


Adolescent Fertilization

by Digdeepenough



Category: My Chemical Romance, The Used
Genre: Cancer, Domestic Violence, Drug Use, First Time, Homophobia, M/M, Mpreg, Religion, Teenage Pregnancy, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-16
Updated: 2014-08-18
Packaged: 2018-01-15 22:21:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 19
Words: 41,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1321327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Digdeepenough/pseuds/Digdeepenough
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It's a form of, uh-- the human body is a form of art. Every piece of art is different and people will find out, but don't be scared... You're my favorite student and when I say this I mean it. You're not a freak... You're different and distinctive art is the most beautiful."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Third base

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Deciding to bring AF over here. I'm gonna' finish it <3
> 
> Enjoy!

They never make it past second base. It was always deep, intimate make out sessions on either one of their beds while their parent's talk downstairs, being very quiet as to make sure their boys aren't getting too 'busy'. 

 

Strict parent's they were, well, Bert's parents were anyway. They were always making sure Gerard and Bert weren't doing god knows what upstairs. It was Bert's father who sometimes kept his ear to the door and had a video camera hidden in Bert's book shelf. Some parents would say that's a bit over the line, and yet they'd agree that's what best, but not Gerard's.

 

Donna and Donald never quite understood the McCracken’s method of keeping an eye on the boys. The Way's believed teenagers (gay or straight) should have the same substantial outlook on society, but they knew... They knew that wouldn't happen just because they believed that was right. Especially when so many see it to be such a dilemma.

 

Arguments from both families didn't tear the boys apart. The Way's would comment on how 'too religious' and degrading the McCracken's are towards their eldest son because of how they would critique that Gerard was too free spirited and liberal, and complain about how his parents were hippies. 

 

Bert didn't agree. Okay, maybe he'd agree about Gerard's parent's being hippies, but he liked them. He liked everything about the Way family. On the other hand, Gerard didn't like Bert's parent's too much. He felt that they had more to say behind his back instead of to his face; that wasn't classy, not one bit.

 

Although the families hated each other and they were never able to make it in the same room for less than ten minutes, the teenage boys still loved each other. They loved each other and that's all that had mattered to them. It was their life and their parents would just have to sit back and pretend they liked each other.

 

It was their first time. Bert and Gerard, they took the opportunity of Bert's parent's not being home and went all out, even though they weren't ready mentally and they didn't have condoms, but the day was warm and they were touching each other in the right spots.. It just seemed like it was the perfect time to please and be pleased. 

 

Bert was a year older then Gerard; he was eighteen while Gerard was seventeen. They worked well together and they loved each other’s company, but they were both teenagers. They weren't ready for it... Any of it.

 

"Mm... Wait, wait..." Gerard gasps, pushing his hands against Bert's chest to break the deep, intimate make out session. "I... Are we?" he couldn't make out a sentence, especially when Bert was groping his own noticeable hard on. 

 

"Y-yeah, if you want... I mean--my parents aren't home and... And they might have condoms and lubes--fuck G, you look so hot right now, on my bed, sweating..." Bert growls, leaning down to envelope Gerard's swollen lips into another deep kiss.

 

"Mm..." Gerard hums into their kiss and runs his fingers through Bert's unruly hair. "Bert... Fuck--listen to me..." He pulls away from his boyfriend’s lips again, causing Bert to trail his mouth down Gerard's throat hurriedly. "We shouldn't... It doesn't seem right." Gerard allows Bert to keep sucking at his skin.

 

"M'parents have got condoms, G... We've been dating for like a year and a couple of months now and we've been going back and forth like this. I love you... I know we'll be together forever and I know it'll be me... Your first time and you'll be mine." Bert says, pulling away from Gerard to stare into his eyes. "You love me... Right?" 

 

"I-I do, Bert. I've never loved anyone like this... But..." Gerard pauses to let out a deep sigh.

 

"But... But what? I want us to do this. I really do." Bert presses on the subject, grabbing Gerard's hand to push it down against his erection. "You make me like this... You make me feel like this... Like I need to be inside of you." Bert holds Gerard's hand there and Gerard gnaws down his bottom lip. Bert was extremely hard and it turns him knowing that he was making Bert feel like that.

 

"Bert, I've never... I don't know what to say. I've never done this before and I don't--I don't want to turn you down. I want to do it too, but I'm scared. I'm scared shitless. I don't want you to think I'm too ugly, or I'm not what you thought I'd be..." Gerard says; his hands shaking as Bert lets him go.

 

"You aren't ugly and I picture you the way you are. I love you... I wanna' make love to you," Bert says and Gerard gasps; his mouth opens goes into a small 'o' shape when he feels Bert's hands trail into his pants. 

 

"I don't know... What if... What if we don't like it? Or what if I'm no good at it..." Gerard continues to say and Bert shakes his head slowly. "I don't want to disappoint you."

 

"You won’t... You won't. I love you no matter what, okay?" Bert says those words and they stay with Gerard.

 

"O-okay.... We'll do it. We'll have sex." Gerard tell him, shakily, and Bert gets up to go get the condoms and lube.

 

When the older boy comes back something was missing, "My parents are out of condoms... We're both virgins so it's okay, right? It's not like you'll get pregnant." Bert uncaps the lube and sets it down on his night stand.

 

"I... Yeah, sure... I'm a little nervous, so... So can you turn off the lights when we do it?" Gerard sits up and bited his bottom lip.

 

"Yeah... Um, sure that's cool. Whatever you want." Bert flips down the switch and shut his door. The room goes completely black and Bert starts to make his way on the bed. "Shit, bumped into the dresser," he laughs and Gerard chuckles nervously.

 

Bert soon makes it on the bed and reaches out and pushes Gerard on his front, "It'll probably be better on your stomach. Less of a hassle..." Bert grunts, working Gerard's skinny jeans off. "Yeah... That's it." Bert whispers, running his hands down Gerard's smooth thighs. "You're so thin, baby," he says as Gerard turns himself on his stomach.

 

"I'm not skinny..." Gerard whispers as Bert's hands works off his underwear.

 

"You are... You are. You're perfect." Bert kisses down on Gerard's lower back, then kept going...

 

"What are you... Doing?" Gerard pauses and gasps when Bert's tongue pressed against him. "Fuck, Bert... What the hell?" he groans in pleasure, "D'you have to do that? Can't we just... Oh god."

 

"I'm gonna' finger you now, okay?" Bert pushes his finger against Gerard's entrance. "Pass the lube..." He sticks his free hand out and Gerard reaches for the lube on the night stand and gives it to Bert quickly.

 

"Okay, yeah... It's gonna' be cold." Bert squirts the lube against Gerard's entrance and rubs it around his fingers. "Okay, I'm going to push it in now, you ready?" Bert asks; his finger tip already making its way in Gerard's body.

 

"Y-yeah. Just do it." Gerard takes an intake of breath and squeezes his eyes shut and presses his face down on Bert's pillow. "Sss... Shit." Gerard groans, because really, it felt awkward.

 

"Just relax... I read it somewhere that it says you gottah be relaxed." Bert manages to pull his gaze away from Gerard's ass. "My eyes are adjusting to the dark... I can kinda see you now." Bert runs his free hand down across Gerard's lower back.

 

"Great, now you'll see how fucking disgusting I am..." Gerard grunts as Bert adds a second finger.

 

"No... Now I'm seeing how beautiful you are." Bert pulls his fingers out and works off his shorts and boxers, then yanks his black flag band tee off as fast as he can. "Okay... I'm going in now... Shit," he gasps. "I'm not gonna' lie. This is going to fucking hurt... A lot," he presses his hand against Gerard's hip.

 

"I know... I know. That's why I'm scared shitless. I don't do pain." Gerard raises his head up and all Bert can see is his messy, black hair.

 

"Well, yeah, but it'll start feeling good really fast. It'll make you forget about the pain, G... If I hit it you'll forget about that aching feeling and you'll beg me to hit it again..." Bert breathes, pushing the head of his cock against Gerard's entrance.

 

"I hope you're right, Bert." Gerard drops his face on the pillow again and grips his fist around the blankets. "Shit... Fuckfuckfuckfuck..." He cringes as he feels Bert's tip enter him.

 

"Goddamn... This feels fucking amazing." Bert grabs a hold of Gerard's hips with slippery hands.

 

All in the moment of it all Gerard folds his lips shut and shys away from the intrusion. "Ow, ow, ow... M'ungh. It hurts... It fucking hurts, Bert," he croaks. "Can we stop for a second, please... I don't think it's supposed to feel like this."

 

"Fuck, G... It hurts in the beginning. You'll get used to it. I'm almost in." Bert sticks his hand up in the air and pulls the string for the ceiling fan light down.

 

He gazes down once the lights were on and notices blood spots against Gerard's pale skin. "Shit..." Bert looks at his dick. Gerard's ass is swallowing it so beautifully, especially when he clenches a little.

 

Fuck yeah...

 

"What's wrong?" asks Gerard; his voice breaking.

 

"N-nothing, baby... Fuck... You're just bleeding a little. S'normal." Bert shuts his eyes and pulls the switch down again to turn the lights back off.

 

"What!? That's normal? Oh my god..." He pauses when he feels Bert nod. "You can... You can try and move now, but slowly, okay?" Gerard swallows the lump in his throat and Bert slides out slowly then pushes back in the same way. He hears the hitch of Gerard's breath and then he feels the tremor that comes after.

 

"Tell me when I hit something, okay?" Bert asks and Gerard nods quickly; his hands tightening on the silky duvets.

 

"It still fucking hurts so much. I don't know how this can be hot... The pain is just fucking unbearable. Fucking god. It hurts." It sounds like he was going to start crying, so Bert stops momentarily. He stops when he's in all the way; his balls against Gerard's skin.

 

"Sshh, quit thinkin' about it so much." Bert starts to thrust a little faster. In no time Gerard's gasping silently and pushing back against Bert like a cat in heat.

 

"Did I get it?" He hit Gerard's spot in that angle again and Gerard moans out loud this time whilst nodding his head. Bert takes it as the cue and starts to slam in and out of Gerard. He's dizzy and he feels like he'll come any minute because he's been inside Gerard for a while now.

 

"Oh fuck... Yes." Gerard whimpers, moving his hips back and Bert can't help but start to fuck him harder, faster, and deeper. "Yes... yes, yes, fucking!-OH-yes!" Gerard chants; his body shaking from the pain and pleasure of it all.

 

"Fucking hell, Gerard... You sound so damn hot." Bert grunts as he deepens his thrusts and squeezes hard on Gerard's hips, hard enough to bruise.

 

He feels himself come--He feels himself explode inside of Gerard and it feels fucking amazing.

 

Gerard soon comes with two strokes of his erection and when he's just laying there, trying to recover Bert pulls out, gently. They stay like that for a while. Bert's chest against Gerard's back, breathing hard.

 

Gerard moans silently, the aftershock of it all still in his system. His body was pulsing and he can still feel the taps against his prostate. "Mm... Mm..." Gerard makes those small sounds for a long time. Bert likes them. He thinks Gerard sounds like a small puppy whining for his attention.

 

"That was awesome." Bert announces, pushing himself off of Gerard's sweaty clothed back. "Shit, that was really awesome. I can try that again right now."

 

Gerard stays silent and hugs Bert's pillow against his face. He could feel the come drying in between his thighs. "It hurts to move," he finally whisperes, attempting to raise his bottom in the air.

 

"Hey, stay still..." Bert pushes him down and Gerard complies, whimpering silently to himself. "Maybe I should get you an Aspirin or something... Would that help with the pain you think?" he was already making his way to his bathroom and rushing into the medicine cabinet and pulled out a small bottle of pills.

 

"I don't... I don't think your parent's will be too happy with the blood on your sheets..." Gerard squeaks out, looking down on the stained blankets. 

 

Bert stops in place and listens to Gerard breathe. "I'm such a shit boyfriend... I can't even... I can't fucking make your parents accept me... They think I'm too fucking feminine, too care free. They don't believe I'm right for you. They think I'm like, some dumb bitch who won't ever make their son happy... They set you up on dates with girls who go to their church, Bert. I get so scared--"

 

"Babe. Don't--please, just..." Bert starts walking over to Gerard, the pill bottle's in his clenching fist. "My parents are assholes and they don't understand how much I fucking love you. No girl can replace you and no fucking boy can either. Don't worry and don't be scared because it isn't even like that... Those girls, they're just friends most of the time. Friends from grade school, G. I don't even know why you're bringing this up. You never cared about what my parent's thought. Why should you start now?"

 

Gerard presses his head down on Bert's thigh once the older boy takes a seat on his bed, "I just lost my virginity to you, Bert, and you lost yours to me... I'm scared because it'll bring us closer together and the closer we are the more your parents want to tear us apart. I'm scared because one day they might actually take you away from me... I'm not afraid of the dates they set you up on... I know you don't like those girls, but you're fucking parents can be so persuasive sometimes, with those goddamn plans of theirs," he sniffs soundly and Bert pets his hair back and moves his hand against Gerard's throat and gently touches the little ball moving up and down when he swallows.

 

"They aren't persuasive... They're wrong and they're just really strict." Bert pauses and uncaps the bottle and pulls out two for Gerard to take. "Here. I'm going to get you a glass of water. I'll be right back," he passes Gerard the pills before he gets up and slips his boxers on and then rushes out of the room.

 

Gerard lays there with the pills in his hand. His mind goes back to the pain he was feeling in his ass and how much it hurt. Bert had done his part and he was good at it. He really was, but that doesn't mean that the pain would have been avoided.

 

It was no mystery that Bert's parents would find out. They keep an eye out even if they aren't in the house at all. It worried Gerard--it really did, because besides that video camera that's hidden Gerard knows there might be something else. Bert's parents were that psycho and their hatred towards Gerard made them more aware around their son.

 

"Here, baby..." Bert sits next to Gerard and hands him the cup of water. "Hopefully it makes you feel better.

 

"Mhm, thanks." Gerard sits up and downs the pills with the waters help. "You should turn that video camera on now... Before your parents get home," he says before slipping into the blankets of Bert's bed.

 

"Yeah... Hey, you going to sleep?" Bert runs his fingers through Gerard's hair and the younger boy nods, biting down on his bottom lip whilst closing his eyes slowly. "Mm, s'okay then... I'ma stay up and clean around the house before the rents get here..."

 

"No..." Gerard whimpers and grips onto Bert's hand. "Don't leave me... Stay. Stay here with me," he sounds desperate to Bert. He needs to be with someone.

 

"I. Okay, babe... I'll stay," he smiles weakly and crawls into his bed next to Gerard. "When my parents get home I'll talk to them, okay?" Bert whispers and pulls Gerard's head against his chest. The younger boy nods and lays his arm down on Bert's naked stomach. "I'll make them accept us and I'll make them leave you alone."

 

Gerard continues to nod and suddenly a deep sleep envelopes him. The last words he hears from Bert were, "I love you and I'll never leave you... I promise," and those words, they stay with Gerard.


	2. Aftermath

Gerard wakes up the next morning to an empty spot on Bert's bed. A strip of light from the middle of the curtains shines across his face and he squints, trying to adjust to the bright light. "M'Bert?" Gerard croaked, pushing the sheets back and stared down at the stains on the mattress. It reminded him of how he and Bert 'made love'. They lost their virginity to each other and it was just as perfect as Gerard could have ever imagined... Painful as fuck, but still perfect.

 

He received no response from the eighteen year old boy, so he decided to climb out of bed and scurry into the bathroom in Bert's bedroom for a nice, cleansing shower. 

 

He needed to go home and explain to his mother in person why he didn't go home that night. He wasn't going to tell her about what he and Bert had did, heavens no! He was going to tell her they had watched a movie and passed out. It seemed a little bit more appropriate.

 

Gerard pulled his shirt off before stepping into the water and drew the curtains down so he wasn't visible to anyone who walked in and wasn't Bert. 

 

He felt like he'd been in there for hours and no one—Bert—walked in. He might have been downstairs or outside... Gerard figured he was talking to his parents and pretending nothing happened, pretending they didn’t lose their virginity to one another and Bert's parents would buy it. As sad as that sounds the McCracken's wouldn't have a clue because they don't talk to Bert like that. They had time to disapprove, but they didn’t know Bert well enough to look at him and tell something went down. They weren't good parents like that.

 

He climbed out of the shower and grabbed Bert's towel, drying himself off then slipped his shirt over his head slowly. He then wrapped the towel around his waist and rushed into the room to search for his underwear and jeans. His hair was wet and caused a damp circle on his back which made him shudder because of the breeze he was getting from Bert's ceiling fan.

 

The sound at the door made Gerard stop moving and his attention turned to it, "Baby?" He whispered, thinking Bert might be the one at the door, and when it opens quickly, Scruffles, the house cat, comes rushing in, rubbing himself against Gerard's wet legs. "Hey, kitty-kitty." Gerard giggles, pulling his underwear on under the towel. He sat on the bed and pulled the towel off to slip his tight jeans on. 

 

Scruffles rushed up on the bed and smashed his cheek into Gerard as he purred loudly. 

 

"Gottah go look for your daddy, boy." Gerard feels his allergies coming on and pushes the cat away gently to get up and head down stairs with the cat following him. Sometimes Gerard thought the cat knew he was allergic and he messed with him because Bert's parents put him up to it.

 

"Bert!" Gerard hollered, looking around the living area and then the dining room, "Bert, where are yo—" he stopped when he saw Mr. McCracken glaring at him from the dining table.

 

"Took advantage of the situation, didn't you Gerard?" He has the Sunday newspaper in his lap and a glass of water in his hand. "Couldn't wait until we were out of the house so that you could have Robert all to yourself... Hmph."

 

"I. It's not like that, Bert called me and asked me to come over. He said he didn't want to be alone," he watches as Mr. McCracken gets up, an intimidating twinkle in his eyes, and walks towards him as he takes off his reading glasses. He felt like a pack of hungry lions crippled prey, like Mr. McCracken was going to attack him at any minute.

 

This is when Gerard got scared. He didn’t do well knowing he was being judged as he stands. Mr. McCracken frightened him more than Mrs. McCracken. The way his graying hair covered the bald spot on the top of his head, his sun spots darted across his face, and the worst part was his height. Mr. McCracken was pretty tall.

 

It never stopped, the way the McCracken's would throw cheap words at him and tell him he wasn’t good enough to be with Bert and sometimes Gerard just felt like blaring out, "At least I give your son an erection, can any girl do that?" but if he said that, the McCracken's would for sure ban him from their religious house.

 

"You aren't anything special... I don't know what my boy sees in you... He's never been in this stage. This 'homosexual stage' of being 'bi-curious'. He's always liked girls, but when you came around... It was when you came around," he was circling Gerard like a shark. Like the fucking predator that he was.

 

"Pops." it was Bert's voice and Gerard feels relieved and hurries towards Bert, taking his hand. "Hey, baby..." Bert whispers, forgetting about his father. He pushes a strand of Gerard's hair behind his ear and pecks him on the lips slowly, "Sorry I wasn't there when you woke up. I went down to talk with my mom," he nuzzles his nose against Gerard's and Mr. McCracken slips his glasses on slowly and coughs agitatedly to catch the boys' attention.

 

"Next time we're not home he's not allowed here. You know our rules, Robert... No one is to be here when your mother and I are away," he exclaims. 

 

Bert rolls his eyes while Gerard nods slowly. "Dad, he's got a name. Say his fucking name for once, goddamn it, you and mom are so rude." Bert says, dragging Gerard through the kitchen where Mrs. McCracken was making breakfast.

 

"Don't you use foul language on me! And I don't have to say his name! He isn't anything important to me!" They hear Mr. McCracken say. Mrs. McCracken looks back and raises a thin brow in confusion.

 

"Oh... Um, good morning, Gerard," she says, unenthusiasticaly.

 

"Good morning, ma'am." Gerard coughs nervously and takes a seat at the breakfast table.

 

"Bert tells me your father got a new job at the local humane society... That's interesting," she starts conversation whilst frying some eggs and bacon.

 

"Yeah, he really likes it... Saving animals and stuff. He says he's glad he quit working in the office at food mart. He's much happier when he comes home." Gerard explains as Bert goes through the fridge and pulls out a gallon of fresh orange juice and a glass cup.

 

Mrs. McCracken doesn't say another word and Gerard looks down on the table nervously.

 

Mrs. McCracken sometimes reminded Gerard of a crazy English teacher. The way her grammar immediately made her superior towards everyone else and how she didn’t acknowledge anything unless you compliment her or exchange feelings on a book. The one cool thing about her, though, is that she likes Harry Potter; she was religious, yeah, but she still knew how to appreciate amazing literature—such as Harry Potter.

 

"Your dad's pretty hardcore, G." Bert smiles, tenderly kissing Gerard's neck and handing him the cup. "Has he like, busted any animal abusers yet? Like illegal pit-bull fights?" Bert attempts to try and break the tension with a conversation and Gerard was thankful for a boyfriend who noticed when he wasn't feeling comfortable.

 

"Well, I think he said he's bringing home a Yorkshire who was mistreated and give 'im to Mikey as a Christmas present." Gerard states, after taking a drink from his glass of juice.

 

"That's cool... Hey, at school tomorrow Quinn's going to bring World of Warcraft. He wants to give it back to you." Bert sits in the seat across from Gerard and watched his mom drop a plate of food in front of each of the boys. "Thanks mom." Bert smiles cheerfully as he starts to dig in.

 

"Thank you, Mrs. McCracken." Gerard says as well and she nods at them both and goes back to the stove to cook up some more.

 

Bert and Gerard continue to talk and laugh about random things until Mr. McCracken walks in and passes them to get into the garage. "When you're done eating, Robert, I want you to come help me fix up the front yard, I saw one of the neighbors dogs using it as a urinal," he sounds pissed and his face was bright tomato red as he eyes Gerard.

 

Fuck... It was so obvious Mr. McCracken totally wanted Gerard dead for 'stealing' their son from them.

 

"Your mother called, Gerard... She said she wanted you home by three thirty today. Something about Michael being ill and returning back from the hospital. I hope he's alright, poor boy. Such a young age to deal with cancer," Mrs. McCracken whispers, shaking her head. Bert looks at Gerard and drops his spoon.

 

"Mikey was in the hospital again?" Gerard gasps and hops off of his seat. "Why didn't you say so earlier?!" He was already tearing up at the thought of Mikey getting more chemo doses and his mother there without him—without him to hold Mikey's hand through it all.

 

"I didn't want to upset you, Gerard. You need to eat your breakfast!" Mrs. McCracken turns away from the stove and watches Bert get up and follow Gerard out of the kitchen.

 

"Robert! Robert, where are you going! Come back here. Come back now! I am talking to you." Mr. McCracken hollers, pushing open the kitchen door.

 

Bert's following Gerard down the street, the younger boy jogging and making turns and shortcuts he and Bert had made up together. He was getting dizzy and when he felt a hand tugging on his wrist he turns around almost immediately. "Didn't know you were following me," he says out of breath.

 

"What the hell d'you expect me to do? Let you leave without giving me a kiss." They start walking, their hands intertwined. When Gerard didn’t reply Bert stops walking and took Gerard's face in his hands and kisses him hard on the lips. "I'm not psychic, but I know Mikey's going to be okay, G..." Gerard's gaze adverts to the ground and Bert sighs, "Look at me, baby... Look, Mikey's a strong kid. He's okay. You gottah keep thinking positive. If you lose faith how'll Mikey be stronger?"

 

Gerard lets out a deep breath he didn't know he'd been holding in and nods his head slowly, "You-you're right."

 

Bert smiles and takes Gerard's hand. "Yeah, so c'mon, Mikey'll be happy to see his big brother."

*

"Mom! Dad! I'm home!" Gerard hollers, pushing the door open and stepping inside of the warm home. "C'mon, Bert. They might be upstairs." Gerard says to his boyfriend when he doesn't get a response from his parents.

 

They came across Mikey's open bedroom door and Gerard hurries in, letting go of Bert's hand. "Mikes, oh my god." Gerard gasps, placing his hand on his little brother’s hairless head. "It's all gone, again... Fuck Mikey." Gerard keeps saying until Mikey's eyes peer open.

 

"G, hi..." He waves as Bert walks in to stand by Gerard who was leant over Mikey's little body. “Mom said you were at Bert's house."

 

"I came back. Mrs. McCracken told me you just came back from the hospital... Fucking god, Mikey. It's getting worse isn't it? They told us it was getting better. How are Mom and Dad dealing with it?" Gerard asks and Mikey shakes his head and sighs.

 

"C'mon, Gerard. We gottah let your brother rest... C'mon." Bert says, taking Gerard's arm and helping him up. "We'll go find your parents and talk with them... Don't stress Mikey out."

 

Gerard agrees and they walk out, telling Mikey to sleep well before shutting his bedroom door.

 

"My parents should probably be in the basement doing laundry. It's Sunday." Gerard says, walking down the stairs near the kitchen and hurried into the basement with Bert following close behind him. "Mom, Dad... It's me." Gerard walks in as Bert stood by his side.

 

"Ah, Gerard..." it was Donald's voice and he was loading the dark clothes into the dryer while Donna loaded the light clothes into the washer. “You're here... Hello, Bert." he goes back to focusing on the laundry.

 

"You saw Mikey?" Donna asks, while pushing the buttons on the washer machine. "He wanted to see you so bad after we got out of the hospital... I called Mrs. McCracken and she said you had been asleep. I didn't want to wake you."

 

"I... I wouldn't have cared, mom. Mikey's more important to me than anything else." The room goes quiet and Bert takes Gerard's hand to show him out of the garage.

 

"Two more years..." Donna squeaks and Donald sits down on a chair and wipes his eyes; he was trying not to cry.

 

"What?" Gerard asks, looking at his parents in shock.

 

"Mikey's got two more years to live, Gerard. Don't make us repeat it." Donald cuts in and Donna nods, wiping the tears away from her face. "It was so goddamn hard to not cry in front of Mikey on our way back from the hospital. We pretended nothing happened... God. What the hell did we do to deserve this... What did he do?"

 

"Dad... Mom. It isn't your fault." Gerard was crying now and Bert was listening to everything, trying not to cry, but it was so hard not to. He had known little Mikey for quite some time now. Before he had ever met Gerard. He use to help Mikey fly kites and Mikey would tell Bert about this 'amazing' big brother he had, but he never came outside. 

 

Bert was so nervous when he finally got to go into the Way's house hold for the first time. Mikey kept saying: "We're gonna' go to G's room and I'm going to make you guys friends--best friends!" 

 

It was because of Mikey that Gerard and Bert had even known each other. Yeah, they went to the same school, but they weren't in the same grade so they never got to see each other. But when Bert first saw Gerard he instantly recognized him and he had opened his mouth and said, "You're the kid that blew the football team!"

 

Gerard had looked shocked because it was just a rumor that had been spread in middle school. He thought he had gotten over that, but the title stuck with him because the boys who had played football in middle school now played it in high school. The torment still hasn't stopped.

 

Bert's first impression wasn't great or romance-novelized, but it was a start. Gerard hadn't said anything to Bert's first words. He merely tugged on his own ear, nervously and pushed his hair away from his face, enough for Bert to see the blush under his cheeks. 

 

That's when Bert knew he'd never say anything like that to Gerard again. Gerard stood there very awkwardly and his face was so red. Bert felt like a fucking idiot, standing there with Mikey at Gerard's door way, but when Gerard had went to close the door Mikey grabbed his hand and said, "G, this is Bert. He's like you." Bert didn't get what Mikey meant, but later, if he recalled, Mikey meant Bert had been 'homosexual'. 

 

Bert wasn't openly gay at the time. He was actually going out with the girl who was captain of the drama club. He didn't get what Mikey meant as 'he's just like you'. And if he did, he wasn't going to disagree. Gerard was just pretty enough to make him gay for as long as he lived. If not, just make him bisexual without even going through the bi-curious stage, because that's just how pretty Gerard was to Bert.

 

Mikey had dragged Gerard outside and sat him down on the swings they had in the backyard and Bert on the one next to him as they watched Mikey attempt to juggle. It was so adorable. That he attempted to entertain them and at the end Mikey had taken Bert's hand and forced it on Gerard's thigh.

 

"Mikey... What are you doing?" Gerard asked as he looked down at Mikey's hand on top of Bert's, which had been on top of Gerard's thigh. 

 

"I want you guys to be best friends and you aren't being fun, G. Bert said that he was just like you so you two should be friends!" Mikey had released his hand and Bert hadn't moved his hand from Gerard's thigh.

 

It had suddenly hit Bert. One day Mikey had described Gerard as a lonely kid who sat by himself and never wanted to be around people and Bert had replied that he was 'just like Gerard'.

 

"I think he means that we're the same... Socially. Erm, like, we don't--that we like being alone." Gerard had looked down at Bert's hand and then up at Bert.

 

"You're Robert McCracken... You hang out with the football team... And every other club on school. You've got more friends than anybody. Stop lying to me, because I hate liars. I really do." At that point Bert had removed his hand from Gerard's thigh, embarrassed, and got up off the swing.

 

"I. Uh-erm. I gottah go, Mikey. See you tomorrow?" he asked the seven-year-old. 

 

Mikey had nodded and waved to Bert as he hurried out of the backyards gate.

 

"You're so grumpy all the time, G..." were the last words Bert heard Mikey say before he left.

 

It was thanks to Mikey Bert and Gerard had even ever met each other in the first place. If it wasn't for that day, Bert would have never approached Gerard at lunch and asked to sit with him. It was all because of Mikey. He was thankful for the little boy.

 

"Two fucking years, Bert... Two years. He'll be ten in two years. You know that, right? Oh my god..." Gerard sobs, laying on his bed as Bert works off his own shoes and jeans. 

 

"Don't think about it right now. Think about this, though. In two years they might be able to cure his cancer... You just never know, baby." Bert takes a seat on the end of Gerard's full sized bed and starts to work the younger boy’s socks off. 

 

"Come here..." Gerard whispers, sniffing soundly, and Bert forgets about Gerard's other sock. 

 

He lays his body down on top of Gerard's and begins to kiss the boy. Their tongues dance together and their quiet moans fill the air. They felt relaxed and Gerard's toes curl up as Bert continues to plant kisses down along his collar bone.

 

"I don't feel sore anymore..." Gerard whispers and Bert stops kissing him and looks into his eyes. "I don't mind if we do it again for our second time... I feel like I wanna' do it again, like, my insides are burning. Is that normal you think? I don't want you to think I'm acting like a needy whore, but--"

 

Bert nods his head quickly and Gerard frowns. "I'm acting like a whore?"

 

"No!" Bert laughs and Gerard chuckles. "I nodded because I do want to do it again too. I would be a fucking idiot to turn you down and keep you sexually frustrated. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I just fucked you when you're too tired or sore or whatever it is you would feel to not want to have sex." 

 

Gerard shrugs his shoulders and Bert smiles. "So are you ready?"

 

"I... Yeah, I am, but should we go somewhere else? Mikey's next door sleeping and my parents can walk by my bedroom door any second." Gerard explains and Bert shakes his head.

 

"We aren't going anywhere else... Plus where would we go? We can’t go to my house that's for sure... And we can’t go to Quinn's or Jepha's.... Maybe... Dan? He lives on his own." Bert suggests as he went down a list of his close friends.

 

"At Dan’s...? Bert I don't know him like that. I can’t just—we can’t just have sex on his bed when he's inside the house." Gerard laughs and Bert sighs, slightly agitated.

 

"So, if he wasn't there you'd do it?" Bert raises a brow and Gerard shakes his head, a small smile on his lips. "Yeah right... You'd do it. You'd bend over and spread em' for me on one of my best friends bed while they aren't home." 

 

"I so wouldn't." Gerard says; his voice serious and strict, but of course he was being as comical as Bert.

 

Bert giggles loudly and presses his face into Gerard's shoulder, wrapping his arms around the younger boy’s waist, "Mmm... God, I love you."

 

"I love you too, but what are we going to do?" Gerard laughs, raking his fingers through Bert's short, blond hair. "I think we can do it here, but we have to be extremely quiet." He concludes and Bert nods his head, still breathing in Gerard's scent. "Turn out the lights, then..." 

 

Bert removes himself from Gerard's body slowly, and stands up to turn the light switch down. "You got lube, right?" Bert asks, going through Gerard's underwear drawer. "Ah, here it is... You sneaky bastard, Gerard." 

 

"That's for jacking off, babe..." Gerard whispers from his spot on the bed.

 

"No wonder why there's so much in here. You hardly do anything... Maybe I should take this, eh?" Bert slips out of his boxers and shirt then dives back into bed with Gerard, "You naked already?" he wonders, running his hands down the side of Gerard's face.

 

"Hold... On. I'm. Working. On. It." Gerard pauses each time and removes his underwear, and his shirt as well this time. "There you go... Fuck—is the door locked?" He panics, pulling the blankets over his naked body as soon as he hears footsteps on the stair case.

 

"Yeah, locked it when I shut the door, babe, relax..." Bert works his own erection in his hand and watches Gerard spread his legs as his eyes adjust to the darkness. "On your back this time, right?" Bert whispers, making sure the Way's won’t hear him. 

 

"Mhm. Hey, give me the lube. S'just gonna' try and prep myself so you don't have to do all the work." Gerard sits up on his lower back and reaches out for the lube Bert had in his left hand while his other hand worked up and down his cock. 

 

"Good idea, here..." Bert groans, letting Gerard take the tube. 

 

They stay silent like that for a moment. Gerard emits small breaths that indicate he was already pressing his fingers inside himself and Bert swipes his hand up and down himself faster to the sound and sight. 

 

Gerard had always been one to enjoy Bert's company, just talking, kissing, and cuddling, but now they can do so much more with each other. It was fun, just good fun and that made Gerard feel like nothing bad could come from it. When he was wrapped up around Bert's heart and Bert around his, they felt like a couple who'd always be that happy—so in love. 

 

School was just one thing that kept them together, they'd pass each other in the hall way and say a hi to each other, then kiss against the lockers like all the other heterosexual students and because Bert was so well known, no one ever mocked or made fun of them. If anything, they hear more wolf whistling then words of hate flying towards them.

 

Gerard was happy. He was thrilled he had Bert to hold his hand when they walked back home from school. He wasn't alone on the New Jersey streets and he was safe. He loved the feeling of being secure and Bert was perfect for the job. He was just a perfect boyfriend.

 

Bert could agree that their relationship was as puppy-lovey-dovey as any brand new couples, because they kept that spark there. The playful kicks and sneaky kisses—they still kept that, because Bert just believed in Gerard and Gerard believed in him and the word ‘love’ was just a word that seemed to keep them together, because Bert was pretty sure if he told Gerard he hated him the boy would never talk to him again. The word 'love' was there to keep them together and the 'love actions' kept them from changing.

 

They were young and naïve, but they weren't stupid.

 

The bed didn't work too well with sex. The sound of the head board banging into the wall matched the sound of the squeaky spring. It was awkward and Bert kept losing his erection, having to stop and change positions so often. In the end they finally decided to do it on the floor. 

 

It was Gerard's idea. At first one pillow had fell on the ground accidentally and Bert stilled inside his boyfriends body, because it sounds like a foot step near the door; then more pillows fall on the floor and Gerard's voice came after, "I've got an idea." He whispers lowering his legs off of Bert's shoulders and sat up slowly. "We can just... Move back real quick." Gerard pauses and Bert groans, sliding out of Gerard's body slowly, which allows Gerard to savor the feel of all of Bert's inches inside of him. 

 

Bert grins as he notices the goose bumps that form on Gerard's skin.

 

"We can do it on the ground. The bed makes way too much noise." Gerard rolls on his side and presses his feet on the ground softly. "Gather up some blankets to make it a little softer." 

 

The older boy got up quickly and pulls Gerard’s bed apart, resting the blankets on the ground. "Yeah, there you go." Gerard piles them up, then got down and laid himself down on his back. "C'mon... This is much better."

 

"Fucking hell, you're eager." Bert gets down and presses Gerard's thighs apart, squeezing himself in between the space. 

 

"It feels way better than last night... Plus I'm not so sore so I took the chance to get used to this feeling... I wanna' do this with you a lot more. Most couples break up because sex is such a high demand and it's hardly ever fulfilled." Gerard grunts and his eyes squeeze shut as Bert slides inside of him.

 

"Ah... Fuckin' Jesus." Bert hisses and lets go of the base of his cock and squeezes Gerard's waist instead. "We don't have to do this every day... Though, I totally wouldn't mind it," chuckles Bert, while massaging Gerard's sharp hips. 

 

"Mmm, yeah." Gerard lets his head tilt back as Bert starts to create a rhythm. "S'feels really good." he moans, squeezing his legs around Bert's waist and raises his arms up to pull Bert down by his shoulders so that their faces were close together. "Fuck me... C'mon, Bert." Gerard whines, pressing a soft kiss against Bert's fuzzy jaw and Bert nods, opening his mouth to catch Gerard's lips in a deep kiss as his thrusts turn into slick jabs against Gerard's prostate.

 

"God, yes... Yes, yes... Harder." Gerard manages to gasp out and Bert complies; his face presses into the crook of Gerard's throat, sucking hard on the skin there. 

 

It was killing them—the urge to moan out and holler in pleasure was fought. Gerard kept himself quiet by folding his lips shut and squeezing on the blankets he lies on while his other hand was fisted at the back of Bert's head. 

 

Bert also kept his grunts to a minimal, but it would slip; the small sounds Gerard made was fucking sexy as hell and it was obvious when Bert hit his prostate. His eyes go wide and he arches his spine to feel it again. He makes a small, scratchy, high-pitch noise and Bert wants him to keep doing it, keep arching, and squeaking and pushing back on him.

 

"Harder, harder, Bert... Fuck--please," He can't hold it in. He tried so hard, but Bert was hitting his prostate like no tomorrow and Gerard wants to keep feeling that tingly sensation he was feeling at the tip of his toes and finger tips. The exploding pleasure moves from his chest down to his stomach and he wants to come; he wants to come for all he's worth.

 

"I'm fuckin' coming, G... Shit." Bert hisses out, and right when he finishes his sentence he comes. He comes hard and Gerard feels it spurt inside him, which causes him to jolt in surprise, and with that, Gerard comes after. 

 

It was after only a few minutes of catching their breath and recovering when the knock at the door startles them both. Gerard gets up and pulls a blanket over his shoulders and flicks the lights on. He waits for Bert to grab everything, throw it on the bed, and climb in under the quilts before he opens the door.

 

"Yeah?" Gerard whispers, staring at his father with saucer eyes.

 

"I wanted to make sure you were okay... About the news and all." Donald says and Gerard shakes his head slowly. 

 

"Mikey isn't going to die like this, Dad. I don't even see why you guys had to tell me. Doctors say shit like that all the time, 'oh you'll never walk again,' or, 'you'll never be able to draw again.' It's bullshit, Dad. I don't want to believe it." Gerard growls, tightening the blankets around his shoulders.

 

"Gerard... This is different. It's cancer, son. Mikey's only eight years old. There's a small chance of survival in that, he's been struggling for too long." Donald responds.

 

"No... No, no, no... Are you saying you're going to stop the treatments? If you do that then he'll die for sure!" Gerard cries in defense.

 

Donald was silent for a moment, giving Gerard a chance to speak again. "I'll do the allogeneic bone marrow transplant, Dad. I'll fucking do it. Me and Mikey have the same blood type, right? It'll work..."

 

"Gerard... You're... You can’t do it. You have anemia, you're anemic." Donald whispers. 

 

To Gerard, his dad was making an excuse because he didn't want to have two weak sons. 

 

"Fucking bullshit! The anemia isn't even that bad. I'm getting better. I am!" Bert could hear Gerard sobbing and he immediately wants to get up and calm his boyfriend down.

 

"You can’t do it, Gerard... Too risky, we'll just pay someone for a bone marrow. Your mother and I are trying as hard as we can. It's hard. It really is--I don't want to lose my youngest son and I don't want to lose you eith--" Gerard doesn't let him finish his sentence; he slams his bedroom door and locks it.

 

"They're crazy, Bert. They're fucking crazy. They can’t stop the chemotherapy..." Gerard sits himself down on his bed and looks around the room.

 

"G, calm down, relax. You have to control yourself... Do it for Mikey. Your dad just said he was going to pay for a donor. It'll work, baby..." Bert sits up behind Gerard and starts massaging his shoulders. "You're so hot headed, babe." Bert kisses down the side of Gerard's neck.

 

"Not right now. Don't touch me." Gerard whispers harshly, shrugging Bert away from him. 

 

Bert sat still for a moment and watches Gerard's back shake each time he let out a small sob. He hardly ever saw Gerard cry and when he did, he felt vulnerable. He didn’t want to say or do anything that would make him even more upset, so he just let Gerard vent, because if he holds it all in Bert's afraid when the time comes and Mikey's gone Gerard will just cry and never stop.


	3. Seed

The days of morning sickness occurs and he starts to miss one day, two days... A week of school, until finally Donna takes him to see a Doctor. They check him and ask for his symptoms.

 

They tell the doctor he's been throwing up in the morning, recent weight gain, and horrible mood swings. The Doctor tells them Gerard's change in diet is what's causing him to be nauseous in the morning, thus the wrenching is causing him to be moody. The doctor doesn't prescribed Gerard any medication besides the advice of taking him to the hospital for an ultra sound to check for any unusual scits.

 

They do just that the next day...

 

The hospital room is cold and Gerard's in a paper gown with an IV sticking into his arm. He doesn't like hospitals, especially since he feels like he's going faint every time they bring the needles into the room.

 

"How long have we been here?" Gerard asks, watching his mom pick her finger nails.

 

"I don't know Gerard, maybe... Two-three hours? Gosh, they're taking their sweet ass time." Donna sneers, staring blankly at the time on her cell phone. "Bert has been calling non-stop. Didn't you tell him you were going to be at the hospital? He should know we're not allowed to use our phones in here."

 

Right on time the Doctor walks back in and he's holding the results in his hand. "Well, the staff and I have looked over these and oh boy... Do we have some shocking news for you folks." He looks a little too surprised and Donna's getting up quickly as the doctor asks for her to join him outside of the room.

 

He can hear them a little, the soft 'mahmahmah' bass noise of their voices sound loud behind the door and it's making him a little nervous.

 

Soon, Donna's walking in alone with a stack of papers in her arms. "Mom, what's wrong? Am I okay?" she doesn't respond so Gerard asks her again. "Ma, am I okay? What's the shocking news?"

 

"Gerard. Please... Not right now... I'm signing a contract--a contract for the hospital to keep this secret from the government so they don't take you for further research experiments," she sounds like she's reading it from a sci-fi movie script and Gerard almost laughs, but he doesn't when Donna doesn't add any further note of the situation being a joke. 

 

The word experiment went through Gerard's mind the most. Experiment like on X-men? When Striker improved Wolverines power and tried to wipe out his memory to make a minion out of him?

 

Gerard had a feeling that this was a bit more serious then that.

 

"Mom. Just tell me what I have. You cant just fucking not tell me my prob—"

 

"Gerard, you're pregnant." she says it fast and it takes a minute for Gerard to take in what she just said.

 

"What? I'm what?"

 

"Pregnant," she says simply, "you're pregnant." 

 

"Mom, that's a joke, right? I can't be pregnant. I'm... I'm not a girl." Gerard protests.

 

"Don't you think I know this? The hospital's pretty serious about this, so let me finish with these papers and then I'll have a word with Doctor Alexander," she exclaims.

 

Gerard believes the hospital mixed his information up with some pregnant chick, so he wasn't too worried about the whole thing—plus, who the fuck ever heard of a guy being pregnant?

 

It's a couple of long minutes later when Donna's finished flipping through papers.

 

"Okay, wait here." she says as if Gerard had a choice. "I'm going to go have a word with your Doctor." she's leaving Gerard alone again.

 

God, I fucking hate hospitals, Gerard thought.

*

"You didn't know your son carried a womb?!" Doctor Alexander hollers and Donna was lost at words. "This is beyond revolution. This boy—this teenage boy is able to produce semen and eggs. He's human of both female and male DNA!"

 

"My son does not have a fucking vagina! Trust me, I've wiped his ass enough times when he was a baby to figure that out. Plus, he's a goddamn virgin. My son's a virgin. This isn't the fucking virgin Mary we're talking about here! It's my son."

 

"Ma'am. May I call you Donna?" she nods quickly and then the doctor continues, "Gerard is however far beyond our intelligence. He's got a living, healthy, breathing, and growing baby inside his very real womb. The ultra sound specialist saw it with her very own eyes! Believe me when I say that many parents these days never really know if their teenagers are still virgins. Many mothers and fathers find out when the daughter comes to the hospital with the same symptoms as Gerard, completely oblivious to the fact of having fetus inside of their womb." 

 

Donna thought about what he had just said and she couldn't believe what she was hearing. "If my son's pregnant... Nothing... Nothing bad is going to happen to him, right?" 

 

"I cant answer that at this moment. We'd have to continue further tests and examinations on him—us as the hospital not a special government or scientist squad." the doctor nods and Donna sighs soundly.

 

"We'd also like to document this for further future knowledge. I'm going to need you to sign this for your permission." He holds out a piece of paper laying down on a clip board and Donna stares at it at least two sentences stare back at her and she signs it. "Thank you. Now shall we go and explain this all to Gerard?"

*

Gerard's about ready to fall asleep when his mother walks in with the Doctor. "Okay, now Gerard. we've got a few news for you." Doctor Alexander says and Gerard allows his mom to take his hand.

 

"Do I have, like, a life threatening disease?" Gerard whispers and Donna shakes her head.

 

"No, Gerard... We've discovered that you've got a womb. A womb being occupied by a fetus at the moment. Now I know this news is stranger to you then it is to us, but it's the truth." The Doctor finishes.

 

Gerard opens and closes his mouth like a fish out of water before he says, "Mom... I--this isn't real. You guys are just joking, right? I mean, how can I be pregnant? There isn't—there's no way for the baby to get out," he jesters down towards his crotch.

 

"Breech access. Seems like the womb is connected to it somehow. It really is marvelous. You know this perverts the bible in so many ways?" the Doctor smiles and Gerard rests his head down on the gurney. 

 

"This isn't fucking possible! Don't tell me you believe these fucking idiots, mom!" Gerard screeches, "How come no other hospitals told us this!?"

 

"This is your first ultra sound, isn't it." The doctor says in a matter-of-fact done.

 

"... I'm not believing this bullshit! That's crazy! Can we sue these people, mom?"

 

"Gerard, now... This is a bit, erm, insane, but it is possible for you to be a hermaphrodite. We were never told of your condition because your birth was secret... In an underground hospital." Donna confesses and Gerard's mouth dropx open to the news.

 

"Wow, well, that may explain a lot to your lack of information." The doctor nods and Donna agrees silently.

 

"I was underage and your father was a couple years older than me. I ran away from home and stayed at your fathers mothers house. I left my parents a note telling them I was leaving to Alaska and that I was going to see them again in twelve months. That was okay enough time to give birth to you at the illegal hospital that was located in a basement with people who were well known to that expert... So, when you were born I went back to my parents with your Father and Elena watched over you for us," she explains and Gerard was shocked, so shocked that he had nothing to say.

 

"So, you see Gerard," the Doctor starts, catching Gerard's attention, "you are in fact pregnant."

*

Donna and Gerard finally make it home from a long quiet drive from the hospital. The whole thing was still impossible for Gerard to grasp so when Donna parked the car in the driveway Gerard rushes out of the car and up the stairs, passing Mikey and his dad who called out to him with their mouths full of pizza as they watched the baseball game on TV.

 

He slammed his bedroom door shut and sat on his bed. The tears he was holding in soon came pouring out. He felt like he was going to explode. His quiet sniffling had turned into sobs, and his sobs turned into fits of outrage. 

 

He was disgusted—disgusted with the fact that his body had been a lie to him and that he wasn't the same as every boy. He was also disgusted with the baby inside of him; his and Bert's baby inside of him.

 

He slammed and threw his things around the room until the knock at his door caused him to stop his terrorizing, it was his mothers voice. "Gerard. let me in... We have to talk about you and Bert."

 

She's going to be so pissed, Gerard thought as he opens his bedroom door.

 

As she walks in she takes a seat on Gerard's bed and looks around the messy room. "When did you guys do it?" she whispers and Gerard takes a seat next to her. 

 

"Three Saturdays ago. At his house." Gerard confesses and Donna shakes her head slowly in disappointment.

 

"Was that the only time? Or—?"

 

"We did it seven more times... Ma, I know that... That Bert and I'll be together forever and he'll support the baby and I, but please, please don't tell his parents." Gerard begs and Donna shakes her head again.

 

"Seven times?" she pauses and places her left hand against her forehead. "I can't promise anything, but I have another question. Whose idea was it to not use the condom?" she asks, rubbing up and down Gerard's spine.

 

"There wasn't any condoms to use and—Bert was a virgin too, we don't have diseases, Mom." Gerard squeaks, standing up and presses his hand against his chest.

 

"Gerard, look what happened. You know how safe sex is important, even if you both are boys... Fuck, this is going to be so hard to explain to your father..." she stands up slowly and watches Gerard stare down at the house phone on his desk. 

 

"I'll let you do what you have to do..." she finally left the room and shut the door behind herself.

 

Gerard picked up his phone and dialed Bert's number as soon as Donna was gone and pressed the phone to his ear once the line started ringing.

 

"Hello?" he hears Bert answer and Gerard takes a deep breath, "Gerard? That you?"

 

"I—uh, yeah, it's me, babe." his voice cracks and tears start running down his face.

 

"What's wrong, you okay? How was the hospital?" Bert sounds worried and Gerard then decides Bert wouldn't mind about having a child with him.

 

"I... It was good and nothing's wrong. I just wanted to hear your voice and say I cant wait to see you at school tomorrow. I'm well enough to go back." Gerard wipes his eyes and sniffs soundly. "I love you."

 

"Man, G, you scared the crap out of me, I miss you too, baby... And you know I fucking love you, but don't scare me like that." Bert sighs and Gerard smiles and nods to himself. "S'that all you wanted to tell me?" Bert wonders.

 

"I—yeah, that's it." Gerard says quickly..

 

"Okay, cool. So, see you tomorrow?" Bert asks.

 

"Y-yeah, see you tomorrow..." he says and Bert gets ready to hang up before he hears Gerard call out to him, "Bert...?" 

 

"Yeah, babe?" 

 

"Bye." Gerard whispers.

 

"Bye..." he says and he hangs up.

 

He wasn't ready to tell Bert and he was scared. More like terrified with how Bert would react, but Bert loved him. Gerard knew that. 

 

He can hear his parents down stairs shouting for him to come down and talk with them and Gerard felt nervous, more nervous then scared or terrified.

 

He made his way out of his room and down the long stairs until finally he met up with his parents in the living room. "Y-yeah?" he croaks, taking a seat on the couch next to his father.

 

"We all need to have a family talk, Mikey's up stairs so your Mother and I can ask you questions. Now, you have to be honest with us. One hundred percent... Okay, honey?" Donald asks, petting Gerard's back. "Now... Did you and Bert have sex?"

 

"I. I already told mom I did, but I didn't think it'd be such a big deal. I mean... If I had known I was a hermaphrodite I would have been more careful... Especially when you and mom had me at some illegal underground hospital." Gerard says, running his fingers through his hair nervously.

 

"Gerard... That-that still doesn't mean you can have unprotected sex! I think you should have this baby as a lesson." Donald nods sternly, removing his hand from Gerard's body.

 

"Don't I already have no choice? I mean, I'd need money to abort it and... And Bert's going to want to have the baby with me." Gerard states and Donna raises a brow up in confusion.

 

"Did Bert say this, Gerard?" Donna asks, pulling her cell phone out of her pocket. 

 

"N-no... But I just know he'll be happy. He loves me. We made love and—I just know he won't leave me, mom..." Gerard looks down and Donald scoffs.

 

"You don't think his parent's would be very angry about this?! Gerard, they hate us and they want Bert far away from you as possible... I'm going to have a word with them and as to why their lovely son didn't use a condom... Fucking think they can make a fool out of you do they?" Donna dials Bert's families house number and waits impatiently for an answer.

 

"Mom! No!" Gerard stands up and looks to his dad, "You're going to fucking let her do this to me?!"

 

"Gerard, his parent's have to know he's no longer a virgin!" Donna shouts, and then goes quiet. "Yes, hello, this is Donna, Gerard's mother, put on one of your parents, dear." she was most likely talking to Bert.

 

"Gerard, have a seat..." Donald takes Gerard's arm and sits him down on the couch next to him. "They need to know..."

 

"No they don't! They don't have to fucking know anything!" Gerard hollers and Donna shushes him.

 

"Hello, Mr. McCracken? This is Mrs. Way. I wanted to talk to you about our boys..."

 

She puts him on speaker.

 

"What's the problem?" he asks, sounding concerned. "Did Gerard do something to Robert?"

 

Donna rolls her eyes and turns to Gerard who crosses his arms over his chest aggressively. "Um, actually no, I'm here to let you know are boys are no longer virgins which means they've lost it to each other... And no condom was in use which is most likely your sons fault since he was the one dominant in the situation."

 

"Excuse me? Robert is still a virgin... Whatever Gerard has told you is a lie. Robert is a son of god, he's going to wait to get married—TO A FEMALE—and lose his virginity then, not with your faggoty little whore of a son." He sounds so sure and Gerard scoffs out loud.

 

"... Faggoty?" Donna pauses and shakes her head quickly. She couldn't believe he used such a childish word. "Um, well, believe it or not Mr. McCracken, our son Gerard, we took him to the hospital and he's um... Well, your son got my son pregnant..." Donna stutters and Mr. McCracken goes quiet on the other end.

 

"You, come here!" he spoke loudly and Bert's voice came on the other end.

 

"Yeah... Um, hello?" it was Bert talking.

 

"Talk to him." Donna passes Gerard the phone and takes it off speaker.

 

"Bert! Hi, it's me, Gerard. I want to tell you something, well, I need to tell you something..." Gerard turns away from his parents. 

 

"Hey, baby, what is it? My dad looks fucking pissed." Bert chuckles and Gerard sighs. "What's wrong? We aren't breaking up are we?"

 

"N-no! Never!" Gerard gasps and Bert makes a sound of agreement. 

 

"So, what is it then?" Bert asks and Gerard takes a deep breath.

 

"Remember... Remember when we said we'd always be together and how we love each other so much and our parents and nothing else can ever break us apart. Well, this is something we've never mentioned and I hope you don't hate me when I tell you this..." Gerard cries and Donna takes a seat next to him and massages his back.

 

"Babe, what is it? You're scaring me, man... Did you cheat on me? Did I do something wrong?" Bert continues to ask.

 

"No, no... It's nothing like that... Bert, god, I don't know how to say this... Fuck—Bert, I'm... I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant with your baby..." the room grows quiet and so does the other line. "Bert, please... Please believe me, I went to the hospital, they say I've got a womb. I didn't believe it at first either, but... But it's so hard not to think about."

 

"I..." Bert starts and Gerard wipes the tears under his eyes and sits up quickly as soon as Bert's voice is present again. "I... Don't. I don't know what to say—"

 

"Robert, Robert, give me the phone." the sound of the phone fumbling stops and Mr. McCrackens voice is now in his ear. "I don't want you anywhere near my son you filthy faggot and next time you and your family have got something to say leave Robert out of it!" and the phone goes dead.

 

"What happened, Gerard?" Donald asks and Gerard drops the phone and runs up stairs to his room.

 

They left him alone the whole night.


	4. Cashier Boy

He doesn't eat for two days, he stays cooped up inside his room, and doesn't acknowledge the knocks at his door. He doesn't even get up when Mikey calls for him. He's truly that upset and on the edge of a nervous breakdown. He doesn't smoke, but Bert left a pack of cigarettes in his night stand from a sleep over a few days ago and he decides to smoke fourteen out of twenty.

 

He didn't care about the baby, because he wasn't suppose to have it. He was doing it a favor and it didn't mean anything, because... He wasn't supposed to have it. He kept telling himself that as he huffed and puffed and coughed his lungs out. 

 

It didn't matter.

 

He was out smoking on his balcony when he heard a shout of his name. 

 

He dropped the cigarette and looked down at the first floor and spotted Bert climbing the tree. "B-Bert? That you?" it was a stupid question, because it clearly was him, Gerard had just wanted to make sure he wasn't imagining things.

 

"Yeah," he finally makes it on the balcony, "hey, um... You didn't go to school? My parent's are pretty pissed at your mom and dad... They don't really like jokes." Bert chuckles and pecks Gerard on the lips slowly. "You been smoking?" he licks at his own lips and grabs the pack of cigarettes off the railing and pulls one out. 

 

"Uhm..." he squeaks and Bert chuckles again. 

 

"I missed you... You know? Are your parents asleep?" Bert asks and Gerard nods and looks up at the sky. 

 

"Pretty..." Bert whispers and Gerard turns to look at him. "You... Not the sky." 

 

"Bert... My parents weren't telling your Dad a joke and what I told you... Before... I'm pregnant. You're the father." Gerard tucks a strand of his hair behind his ear and bites down on his bottom lip as he examines Bert's indescribable expression. "Did you hear what I just said? I'm pregnant. Do you want me to fucking repeat myself like a broken record, Bert? Do you think I enjoy saying this shit?!" 

 

"Babe, calm down, don't you think that that's a bit odd? I mean you can't be pregnant. I had sex with you, you haven't got girl parts." Bert laughs and wraps his arms around the younger boys waist. Gerard allows Bert to hold him and he sighs, shaking his head and leaning into him. 

 

"Mm, I don't feel anything up there..." he kisses the back of Gerard's neck. "You wanna' go inside?"

 

"No. I want you to believe me, Bert." Gerard whispers and Bert lets out a great sigh, unwrapping himself from Gerard's to rub at his eyes in frustration. 

 

"You never take me seriously, do you? Am I just this dumb bitch your parents don't like and it makes you fight harder for me? Huh? Because I'm pretty sure I'm nothing that fucking special." Gerard hisses.

 

"You are fucking special. You're my boyfriend and I love everything about you! Actually, you're so special we lost our virginity to each other! Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Bert asks, squeezing Gerard's arm tightly. "Look at me. Look me in my fucking eyes and tell... Fucking show me."

 

"You could have easily fucked anyone who threw themselves at you like I did. You weren't the one who got fucked in the end, in the ass, and with this kid." he keeps his head down and away from Bert's gaze. "I just want you to tell me you want to be with me even if I have this baby and if you don't you could just fucking walk away..."

 

Bert keep his hands wrapped around Gerard's arm and shakes his head. "No, no... No! I'm not fucking leaving you, G... After all we've been through to keep each other? Fuck that shit, man. You're making me seem like the bad guy here." he growls and Gerard pulls away from Bert aggressively. "Gerard... My parents are fucking idiots and I love you. They can take their bible's and shove them far up their asses. I don't give two shits, babe." he lets out a nervous chuckle. 

 

It was getting darker outside and Gerard can see the moon hiding behind his tree, hiding from the noise he and Bert were making.

 

"You should go..." Gerard shakes his head slowly and Bert stood there silently, a shock of confusion running through his body. "If... If you don't care about this—our baby, then you can go, Bert. You can just leave right now."

 

"Why do you keep insisting that I don't care about you? Gerard, I just cant believe you still think you're pregnant!" Bert hollers, resting his hands down on the balcony railings. "Fuck..." Gerard presses his hands against his eyes and sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. "I didn't... Babe, I didn't mean to make you cry."

 

"I'm not fucking crying!" Gerard screams, letting his hands drop as he stared Bert in the eyes. "Go, leave right fucking now!"

 

"What the hell is wrong with you?! Why are you acting like such a total bitch!?" Bert yells back and eyes Gerard up and down. "If you're pregnant, then you've got the mood swings down right." he starts to climb down the balcony; his eyes on Gerard the whole time. 

 

"Yeah, well, if you don't believe me you can go fuck yourself, Robert!" Gerard hollers, turning around to go back into his room and close his doors with a lock.

 

For the first time in days he's actually leaving his bedroom and his mother watches him as he hurries out the front door. "Gerard, where—?" he doesn't hear the rest of her sentence because he's shutting the front door and walking down the pavement. 

 

"And you can go tell your goddamn parents that they're full of shit and that you and I are fucking over!" Gerard points to Bert who had just stood on the side walk with his hands in his pockets. 

 

"We're over? Are we really, now?! I highly doubt you'd want to be over with me! It's just your hormones talking, G!" Bert laughs as he watches Gerard shake in anger.

 

"Why would you say that, huh? We have nothing in common! You've got friends. I'm a loner. You like people. I fucking dislike everyone I encounter. We aren't right for each other! We're better off apart just the way your parents want it!" he's throwing his arms up in the air and shaking his head dramatically and Bert's rolling his eyes and spitting down on the ground.

 

"That doesn't matter... Our personalities don't have to be the same for us to actually love each other, and I know... I know you care about me and I'll always care about you, but if you want to break up so be it, but if you really are pregnant... Don't come looking for me to be a Father. You drove me away, just let the kid know that much," and with that he's walking off.

 

"Fuck you! I don't need you, you fucking dick! Don't fucking come back around here—you hear me!" Gerard kicks the ground and then turns on his heels and hurries back into his home, breathing loudly through his mouth. 

 

He didn't want his mom to question him so he went back up stairs and into his room where he locked the door again. 

 

He was crying now, sitting on the edge of his bed and letting out these choked sobs and ragged breaths. He sounded like he was beaten up, like someone kicked him in the ribs and stabbed open his heart. It didn't look like he was bleeding, because he wasn't, but it felt like he was.

 

"Gerard, open the door..." it was Donald's voice. He's concerned

 

"N-n-no, go away..." Gerard sobs, pressing his body down on the bed and shoves his face against his pillow. "I want t-t-to be a-a-alone... Right now." he gasps and Donald knocks again.

 

"Open up, Gerard... Your mother and I are worried. You've got to eat something. For you and the baby. You don't want it to die now." Donald says; his voice still very concerned.

 

"I do. I want it to die... I don't need this fucking baby, dad." he chokes out and Donald presses his hand on the door and sighs soundly. 

 

"Do you want to talk to your mother?" 

 

"I... Y-yeah." Gerard nods hard and Donald goes down stairs to go get Donna. 

 

*

 

Donald's standing at the door, hearing his seventeen year old son scream and cry and then finally he's calmed down when Donna walks out, holding wet tissues. "He's going to be fine. I convinced him that it isn't the baby's fault."

 

"We've got to hide all the pills you think?" Donald wonders and Donna shrugs and rushes down stairs and over to Mikey who was playing video games.

 

"Mikey, sweety, ask your big brother if he wants to come to the store with us, okay?" Donna pets his head and Mikey nods, pausing the game and scurries up the steps quickly. "God... I'm so scared for our son... Both of them, Donald."

 

"Me too... Fuck. What do we do?" Donald takes a seat on the couch palms his face. 

 

Gerard was walking down the stairs with his coat on and Mikey's hand in his own. "You boys' ready to go?" Donna asks and they both nod and exit through the front door. "We'll be back soon..." Donna lets Donald know and they share a small peck before she leaves outside to the car.

*

"Not so much junk food, Michael, okay?" Donna parks in the Food-Mart parking lot and climbs out the car as well as Mikey and Gerard.

 

"Okay, mom." Mikey nods and Donna smiles. 

 

"Take my hand, dear." she adjusts Mikey's baseball cap as the little boy takes her left hand. "Okay, Gerard... Come on." she says and Gerard follows behind them slowly, his arm around his body self consciously.

 

They make it inside the store and Gerard swipes his hair away from his face and watches his mother grab a shopping cart. "Get what ever you think we need, okay Gerard?" 

 

"Mhm." Gerard squeaks as a man bumps into him.

 

"So sorry, ma'am..." he stutters and Gerard flushes a light pink and hurries to his mother side.

 

Am I showing that much?, Gerard asks himself as he follows his mother into the cereal isle. 

 

"I think we need some more milk..." she ponders and stares at all the cereal boxes. "D'you want to run down to get the milk, honey?" she turns to Gerard who was still blushing madly.

 

"Yeah, um... Sure." he walks off and hurries to the dairy isle. He looks over all the milks: Low fat, soy, lactose... He didn't remember which one his mom bought most of the time because he never ate cereal or used the milk, because he drank his coffee black. "Uh... Which...?" he looks back to see his mom still picking out the cereals.

 

"Hey, the regular is the kind I see most people get." a guy reaches over and pulls it out and gives it to Gerard. "I mean... You seem like most people." the guy chuckles and Gerard shakes his head slowly.

 

"No... I think my mom gets the soy." he pushes the milk back in and grabs the soy. "Yeah, that's it... Thanks anyways." he turns on his heels and makes his way to his mom.

 

"Gerard... That isn't the right one... Oh well, when we go around you get the regular, okay?" she smiles and Gerard set the milk down in the cart.

 

"Sorry..." Gerard mumbles and mentally smacks himself in the face for not taking what the guy gave him.

 

"It's all right... It isn't the end of the world." she drives the cart down in the other isle and Gerard follows slowly, looking at Mikey stack cans of ravioli in the cart, which he was sat in.

 

They finished getting all what they needed including the switch for the right milk. Gerard was glad the guy wasn't there to laugh at him and say, I told you so.

 

"Oh, look no line right here." Donna pushes the cart against the register and smiles at the cashier.

 

"Hello, ma'am... Oh..." he turns to Gerard and he smiles. "Got the right milk?" Gerard blushes deep red and shakes his head slowly. "That's cool..." the guy says and Gerard looks to his name tag, Frank. Who the hell was named Frank now-a-days?

 

"You find everything well?" Frank asks, starting small-talk.

 

"Oh, yes, of course. Thank you for asking." Donna smiles as she helps Mikey out of the cart. 

 

"That'll be... Eighty thirty eight." he says and Donna retrieves her little wallet out of her purse and pulls out a one hundred dollar bill and hands it over to Frank. 

 

"There you go."

 

"Okay, here's your change..." Frank passes Donna the money as he eyes Gerard with a grin on his face. "D'you go to New Jersey High?" Frank asks Gerard.

 

"Umm, yeah, I do." Gerard nods and Frank smiles. "Why?"

 

"I use to go there." Frank informs and Gerard raises a brow in confusion.

 

"Use to?! Oh my god, how old are you? You look so young. I would have thought you still went there." Donna laughs loudly as she loads the groceries on the cart.

 

"Haha, I'm nineteen. I graduated last year." Frank watches Gerard the whole time as he says that, as if he was letting only Gerard know.

 

"He's seventeen, Junior. Next year he's finished. I'm hoping he graduates and goes to college!" Donna smiles proudly and wraps her arm around Gerard's shoulder. "Isn't that right, baby?"

 

"Y-yeah, mom..." Gerard blushes and let his head drop slightly in embarrassment.

 

"I'm going to the fourth grade next year!" Mikey raises four of his fingers at Frank and smiles with his teeth.

 

"That's awesome, man! You're a big kid, dude!" Frank laughs enthusiastically and sets the last bag down in the cart. "I put the eggs in its own bag so they don't crack. You guys are set. Here's your receipt... Misses...?"

 

"Call me Donna, dear, and this is Gerard and the this is Mikey," she points at each of her boys then stuck her hand out for Frank to shake.

 

He pointed to his name tag and Donna laughed, as he grabbed her hand with his free one. "Nice to meet you all and come again—especially to my register!" Frank says, Donna nods and takes Mikey's hand.

 

"Push the cart Gerard. I've got your brother."

 

Gerard nods and turns back to see Frank biting his lip and watching him. He mouthed good-bye and Gerard waved shyly before exiting the store.

 

Strangely... Frank made him feel less like a freak.


	5. Back to school

Going back to school was something he didn't want to do. His mom had already scheduled a meeting with the teachers to talk about his condition. He had a condition... A sick twisted condition no one else in the world had. He was a boy with a womb. A goddamn womb out of all things—and not just that... He had a baby living inside of it.

 

He couldn't sleep so when his mom came to his bedroom to wake him up he was already aware of the time. 

 

"Finish your cereal... C'mon we're going to be late." Donna watched Gerard push the bowl to his lips and downed the milk quickly.

 

Donald had already taken Mikey to school so she was less rowdy that morning. "Quit rushing me." Gerard got up and allowed his mom to take the empty bowl from his hands and put it in the sink. "The school's still gonna' be there, ma."

 

"I know, but the meeting is at seven thirty. We have to hurry." she rushed to the front door and opened it wide and waited for Gerard to slip his back pack on over his shoulders. 

 

They made it to school at seven ten and no one was around. Gerard thought it was nice seeing the school so empty. It reminded him of a graveyard. 

 

"We're here for a parent teacher conference..." Donna said to the schools receptionist. "Yes, Gerard Arthur Way..."

 

Gerard was seated on the chair near by and placed his hand on his stomach and felt around for a lump that wasn't there yet. He looked deep in thought and when Donna turned to look at him he didn't notice.

 

"Gerard... Come on." she stuck her hand out for Gerard to take.

 

They turned the corner to Mr. Flickers room and entered. 

 

All his teachers were there and they greeted him with warm smiles. 

 

"Gerard! You're alive, man." Mr. Flicker patted Gerard's back. Mr. Flicker was the art teacher, Gerard's favorite teacher. 

 

"Yeah," Gerard chuckled, "I know..."

 

"Okay..." Donna sat down next to Mrs. Youth and folded her arms on the table nervously. "Gerard's been absent for quiet sometime and I spoke with the principal about this and you all should know about his condition... He'll  
need special attention and be allowed to go to the bathroom whenever he needs to." she started to pull the hospital papers out of her purse. 

 

"What's wrong?" Ms. Glock asked, turning to Gerard.

 

"He... Uh, yeah, just look at the papers. Pass it around." Donna passed it to Mr. Brooke and he furrowed his brows together and started to mouth read it to himself. 

 

"Preg... What?" he passed it to Mrs. Youth. "How?"

 

"I'll explain once everyone is finished." Donna nodded and wiped a tear from under her eye.

 

Gerard covered his face and shook his head. He was so fucking embarrassed. They were going to make fun of him... Call him weird and mock him. 

 

Once all the teachers read the papers they went back to Donna and she put them away. "Gerard is... Yeah, he's pregnant."

 

The teachers all looked around in silence, avoiding Gerard. 

 

"It's a form... Of, uh..." Mr. Flicker starts, hesitantly, "The human body is a form of art, every piece of art is different and people will find out..." he finally looks to Gerard. "You're my favorite student and when I say this I  
mean it... You're not a freak... You're different, and distinctive art is the most beautiful."

 

Gerard looked down to avoid Mr. Flickers hard blue eyes and his mom smiled and thanked the teacher.

 

"I just don't know what to say..." Mrs. Youth got up and walked towards Gerard and hugged him. "When I was pregnant... Well, I was scared. I cant imagine how you're feeling." Gerard hugged her back. "Don't worry, kids aren't all that horrible."

 

Mr. Brooke was shaking his head in disbelief and sitting back. "This... This is beyond what the bible has taught us."

 

"That's what the doctor said." Donna mentioned and everyone looked to Gerard.

 

"He's a special boy..." Ms. Glock smiled.

 

"Yeah, he is..." Donna whispered.

*

Gerard made it to his first class in peace. He was so happy all his teachers understood. He didn't feel scared when he made it to Mrs. Youth's class. She smiled at him and gave him his missing assignments. 

 

All the other kids looked at him, surprised with his turn up and asked him where he's been. 

 

Thank goodness Mrs. Youth came to the rescue. "Gerard has been ill... At the hospital. You're better now, right, Gerard?" she asked and Gerard nodded slowly. 

 

"Yeah, um..." he coughed and looked to his history book. "I'm better."

 

He was scared... He usually saw Bert in the halls after third period for lunch and it was time. He met up with some of Bert's friends, Quinn for instance who approached him in the halls and asked if he and Bert were really broken up. 

 

"Yeah." he answered simply and Quinn continued to follow him.

 

"Why?"

 

"Because..." 

 

"People are saying you cheated on him... Saying you sucked Brad off in the locker rooms. That's really fucking low, you know that, right?" Quinn asked.

 

"If you were smart you'd ask yourself... How'd Gerard suck Brad off if he hasn't been to school all week? If anyone was smart enough they'd ask themselves that." Gerard barked and turned to go to the ball field to eat his  
lunch alone like he use to before he ever met Bert.

 

"Bert said that you're pregnant!" Quinn shouted, but Gerard didn't hear him.

 

Gerard sat silently on the bleachers and watched some of the jocks in the senior year stretch and warm up for foot ball practice. They didn't really pay any mind to him as he sat their eating his PB and J sandwich. 

 

"Hey!" it was a voice he recognized. It was Sam. 

 

"Hi..." Gerard waved to her as she took a seat next to him.

 

She usually got on Gerard's nerves, but right now he was happy to see her. "Where the hell have you been? Art class sucks without your emo ass glooming up the place." she giggled and swiped her black hair away from her thin face. "I saw Bert. He looks pretty bummed... Wait, shouldn't you be eating with him right now... Wait! Shouldn't you two be eating each others faces?" she corrected her self.

 

"Uh, yeah, about that. We broke up." Gerard said simply. "Our relationship was pointless."

 

"Bull shit." Sam shook her head and hugged her knees. "You two did everything together... You looked happy."

 

"'Looked' is past tense." he told her and she rolled her eyes. "It's all in the past now."

 

"Nothing's ever left behind in the past. That's why they're called memories and if I can re-call you two had awesome times. You should go talk to him." she touched Gerard's knee.

 

"The situation is more complicated then that..." Gerard stated and took a sip from his bottle of tea.

 

"Yeah... Um, they're saying you blew Brad Marcus... Which is retarded because how would you? You weren't even at school." she laughed.

 

"You're smart." Gerard told her and she looked puzzled, but took the compliment none-the-less. "But, no, we broke up for good. We had a disagreement. Lets just say that."

 

"Hm..." she hummed and shrugged her shoulders. "Okay. Makes sense to me." she was getting up to leave and hopped off the bleachers. "I still think you guys are cute together... Are; present tense." she smiled and walked off.

 

Gerard looked down to his half eaten sandwich and then set it down on the doggy bag. He felt like he was going to be sick.

 

Going to art class was the high light of Gerard's day in school. He felt at home when Mr. Flicker greeted him each afternoon with paint staining his clothes and the smell of coffee coming from the desk. He loved the atmosphere. 

 

"Good afternoon, Gerard." Mr. Flicker smiled and winked at him. 

 

"Hi." Gerard said and took his usual seat. "Did I miss a lot?" 

 

"Don't worry about it... You're excused and what not, but I'm sure if you would have done it you'd pass anyways. You know all this shit." Mr. Flicker waved it off and Gerard nodded. "Your favorite artist is Vincent Van Gogh, right?" 

 

"Y-yeah..." Gerard nodded. "Why?"

 

"As we advance in life it becomes more and more difficult, but in fighting the difficulties the inmost strength of the heart is developed... So he said." Mr. Flicker smiled and Gerard's eyes lit up a bit. "We've got an assignment on him all week."

 

"Awesome." Gerard smiled and actually meant it for the first time that day. "I cant wait to start."

 

Gerard's walking out of art class with a small smile on his face and he feels better. He feels like he can get through the day, but it gets ruined when he sees Bert coming his way. "Shit..." he whispered to himself and turned around to  
go back to Mr. Flicker's class.

 

"GERARD!"

 

He stopped slowly and now everyone was looking at him. "You've been avoiding me. People were telling me you were at school, but I didn't believe them, because I couldn't see you..." he grabbed Gerard's arm and pushed him against the locker aggressively. "What's up with that?"

 

"Bert..." Gerard started.

 

SMACK!

 

"Hey!" it was Mr. Flicker's voice and Gerard's face is turned in the other direction by how hard Bert had slapped him. "Don't hit him!" 

 

"Why not, huh? Because we're in school?"

 

SMACK!

 

"YES! Because this is a school!" Mr. Flicker pulled Bert away. By now everyone in the hall was watching.

 

"There's another reason! Isn't there Gerard... Another reason why I cant fucking kick your ass! Tell everyone. Fucking tell them!" Bert was allowing Mr. Flicker to hold him back. 

 

Gerard was clutching his red cheek. He was still pressed against the locker and now tears were running down his face. 

 

"Gerard, ignore him. He's going to be suspended." Mr. Flicker told him and Gerard shook his head and let go of his face.

 

"I'm... I-I'm..." he felt like he was going to fucking puke up everything he ate for lunch. "I'm pregnant," and with that he did.


	6. Wake up-Make up

"Gerard... Gerard... Wake up."

 

"M'wha--?"

 

"Oh thank goodness..." Gerard opened his eyes to see Mr. Flicker leaning over him, clear blue eyes squinted in worry. 

"He's awake, nurse Michelle, call his parents and let them know, but they're still going to have to pick him up and take him home. He needs to rest." Mr. Flicker's hand was pressed against the side of Gerard's face in a soft touch. "He's got a little fever."

 

"I called. They're on their way already." the nurse said; her voice soft and quiet. 

 

"Ok, good." he pulled away from Gerard and looked down at his watch. "I've got a class I left with Mr. Brooke. I gottah go back. If you need anything call my classroom." he told the nurse as he started to walk out.

 

Gerard laid his hand against his stomach and pressed. He looked over at the nurse who was typing into the computer. "C-can... I go to the bathroom?"

 

"Why of course, sweety! You don't have to ask." she peeled her eyes away from the screen and nodded. "Take your time."

 

Gerard climbed off the bed and hurried into the rest room and shut the door behind him. He was immediately on his knees, vomiting and shivering.

 

"Oh my..." he hears the nurse say. "D'you need my help in there, Gerard?" she asked.

 

"N-no... I've got it." he's standing up and flushing the toilet when he's finished; he washes his mouth before he gets out the bathroom and when he gets out he sees his parents talking to the nurse.

 

"Aw, my poor baby." she approaches Gerard and hugs him as Donald signs him out. "Are you ok? Is everything fine?" she's patting his face and looking into his eyes. 

 

"I'm fine... Just a little nauseous." he nodded, his eyes heavy.

 

"That's normal." Donna whispered and Gerard groaned. "Nothing but the first trimester, sweety. The baby's growing. That's good." 

 

Puking is good? Gerard thinks to himself.

 

"C'mon, let's get you home."

*

The first thing Gerard does is crash into his bed; he's thinking back to Bert slapping him... The slaps to his face. Bert had never put his hands on him. It was weird. He was scared and shocked... And now almost everyone knew he was pregnant, by tomorrow the whole school will know and they'll talk about him and then the world will eventually find out and they'll talk about him too.

 

He couldn't handle that attention. The pressure...

 

"Gerard... Dinner's ready." Donna opens his bedroom door a crack, "Baby, c'mon... Come eat." She pets his hair back and touches his cold, sweaty forehead.

 

"It hurts..." He groans, rolling onto his side. "I'm not hungry... I'll just puke it up."

 

"You have to eat... The baby will appreciate it." She coos, continuing to rake her fingers through his hair. "Y'know... When I was pregnant with Mikey... You liked to wake up at... Fucking ass o'clock in the morning and make me breakfast... Because you knew Mikey needed food. You knew for sure because you'd give me your left overs." Donna says, beaming proudly.

 

Gerard giggles quietly and thinks back at the memory. "Didn't I give you like... A chewed up chicken nugget?"

 

"Yeah." Donna laughs, nodding her head. "You were so cute... Where does the time go..." She sighs.

 

Gerard sat up and let his hand rest against his stomach. "Even though... Bert and I are over I know I can support this baby. I'm kind of happy... I think."

 

"Why are you happy?" Donna asks, moving her hand on top of Gerard's.

 

"Because his parents would be dicks about it." Gerard laughs bitterly. 

 

"I know... God... Those people have sticks up their asses. What's wrong with them?" Donna asks, sounding concerned. "I think they need help."

 

"I know they need help." Gerard hugs his knees when his mother moves her hand away. 

 

"Okay, so... Tell me. How did you like your first time?" Donna smirks. 

 

"Oh god... Ma, I can't talk to you about that!" Gerard shrieks, face palming. 

 

"Oh c'mon! I'm your mother!" She leans in and wraps her arms around her sons shoulders. "And I'm also your best friend. You can tell me anything, baby."

 

Gerard smiles weakly for a second before he says, "It was... Painful, but it got better."

 

"How big was he? Did he use lubricant?" Donna asks all at once and Gerard covers his face again. "C'mon, tell me," she giggles.

 

"Gosh, mom... He... He was a little bigger then me, probably... He was like, seven inches... I think? Or eight. God, I didn't measure him." Gerard blushes, shaking his head. "He used lube, but it still hurt."

 

"Oh lord..." Donna shook her head. "He's a big boy," she mumbles and Gerard nods his head a little. "It's good that he used lubricant. If he didn't I would have marched my ass to his door step and beat him with no mercy," she shakes her fist in the air. 

 

Gerard folds his lips closed and nods. He felt uncomfortable talking about sex with his mother.

 

"My first time," She starts and Gerard glares at her

 

Oh God... Here it comes, he thought.

 

"Was with your Father. I was seventeen... Like you... And I got pregnant."

 

"Like me..."

 

Donna nods, "Yeah, it's funny how that works..." She's staring down at Gerard's belly. "I never in a million years thought I'd become a grandma... You're gay... And Mikey's--" She pauses to wipe the tears from under her eyes. "This baby's a gift, Gerard."

 

There's a knock at the door before it's opening. "Dinner's ready!" Donald chirps, looking over his wife and son. "Am I interrupting something?" 

 

"Um, no... We're done. Lets go eat." 

*

Gerard's walking up the stairs to his bedroom and as soon as he gets in the phone starts ringing. 

 

'ring, ring, ring'...

 

Gerard goes to grab the phone.

 

'ring, ring, ri--'

 

"Hello?" He answers, looking out his window, watching the street light turn on.

 

"Hey, um..." Gerard's heart drops. "It's me... Bert," he coughs. Gerard's silent for a moment, "You there...?"

 

"I..." His voice breaks so he coughs to clear his throat, "I'm here. What do you want?"

 

"I wanted to talk to you about what happened. I regret it, G. I really do. I shouldn't have put my hands on you. I still love you." Bert says; his voice is soft and calm and sincere.

 

"You do?" Gerard asks, moving his hand across the hardly visible bump on his belly.

 

"Yeah, babe... I was just scared. I still don't know what to say about the whole pregnant thing. I mean, I didn't know... I don't know... Are you..?"

 

Gerard let out a deep sigh and nods his head. "Mhm... I'm a few weeks."

 

"Oh..." Bert pauses. "Fuck. The whole school's talking about it. Teachers are defending you. They're telling everyone you're not pregnant. I'm sorry I put you on the spot, babe. I didn't mean to."

 

"It's okay... It's really alright. I don't care about what people think. I'll be showing soon and everyone's going to see. No point in hiding." Gerard explains and Bert makes a noise of agreement.

 

"You're not dropping out?" 

 

"... I cant."

 

"You'll have me supporting you, baby. It's fine. You can do whatever you want." Bert says and Gerard sniffs. He feels happy.

 

"I'm not dropping out. Thanks for the offer though. It's really... It's thoughtful." Gerard smiles, "I love you."

 

He can hear Bert grin through the phone, "I love you too."

 

"Can you come over? I miss you." 

 

Bert wasted no time getting to Gerard's house. He couldn't wait to see him.


	7. Daddy

Bert's climbing the tree that reaches Gerard's balcony and when he knocks on the glass door Gerard's pushing the manor red curtains aside whilst pulling open the french doors. 

 

When there's nothing blocking their way Bert's grabs Gerard by the back of his head and places his mouth over the younger boys lips. "Fuck, I missed you," he says against the kiss.

 

"Y-you too..." Gerard moans, wrapping his arms around Bert's shoulders. "God..." he shudders when they break apart. 

 

"Promise me we'll never break up ever again. I couldn't stand being without you. My parent's were already setting me on dates and fucking calling their friends and asking for their daughters' relationship status." Bert laughs whilst having Gerard lead him to the bed.

 

"Wait until they find me at your house soon... Think they'll happy to see me holding your hand and kissing you?" Gerard rubs his hand over Bert's hard crotch. 

 

"Of course." Bert laughs sarcastically. "They'll throw you a welcoming party."

 

"If only." Gerard leans over Bert and places a kiss against the dip of his chin. "You're growing a beard?"

 

"You jealous?" Bert strokes his own chin, moving his fingers over the blonde fuzz. "It started growing like, last week."

 

"It's sexy." Gerard bit down on his bottom lip seductively before he stroked Bert's cheek with his thumb, "I love your face."

 

"And I love yours too, baby. So pretty and sexy and cute..." He grabs each side of Gerard's face and places a wet, opened mouth kiss against his lips. 

 

"You're full of shit," Gerard lays on his back, pulling himself out of Bert's reach. "I'm none of those things."

 

"Ha. I also love how funny and modest you are." Bert moved on top of Gerard and grindd his erection against his hip.

 

"Bert..." Gerard starts, looking into his boyfriends azure eyes. "Can we have sex... Even though I'm... You know?"

 

"I don't know... I'd have to google that." Bert smirks. "You want my cock?" 

 

"Yeah... I do." Gerard moans, feeling Bert's hands move down to the front of his sweats.

 

"You want me inside of you... Moving, hitting your spot." Bert whispers seductively into Gerard's ear before he nibbles on the lobe. "You like it when I go fast and hard and deep."

 

"Fuck... Yeah." Gerard moves his wrist to his mouth and bit down on his skin there. "Bert..." He whimpers.

 

"Can I finger you?" 

 

"Yes. Yeah, please." Gerard nods his head frantically. He wants to feel something inside of himself. He didn't care what it was.

 

They're moving around the bed, rolling Gerard onto his stomach

 

"I want you to..." Gerard whispers when he's on his stomach; his jeans and boxers off. "I want to have sex with you."

 

"Babe... We don't know if we can."

 

"...We can." Gerard nods, moving his hips up, showing Bert he wanted to do it.

 

"Fine. Okay, yeah..." That's all Bert needs to see before he starts stripping, pulling his shoes off and rolling his socks off his feet. He couldn't resist his boyfriend. Especially when he was practically begging.

 

When he's done stripping he fetches the lube from Gerard's night stand and goes to go turn off the light. "L-leave it on..." Gerard says before Bert can even have the chance to walk over to the switch.

 

"You sure?"

 

"Yeah."

 

Bert's coating his cock with the lubricant and when he's all done and ready he's lining up against Gerard's rose colored entrance and pushes inside, slow and gentle. "That all right?" Bert asks, when he's half way in. 

 

"Yeah, it's good." Gerard lays forward; his head heavy against his pillow as he spreads his legs apart to give Bert more room.

 

"Shit..." Bert's hand rest on Gerard's hips, imprinting them there. "You're tight as hell." He hisses, laying his chest against Gerard's back.

 

Gerard smiles when Bert starts to move. His pace is sensual and when he finds Gerard's prostate he keeps himself pressed against the bundle of nerves for a moment before he pulls back and then moves back in, deeper then before.

 

Gerard's arching his back, moving his hand to his own cock; his grip on it is warm and his jerks are in sync with his quiet moans. 

 

They forget about the world for a second and when Bert starts to move faster the bed starts to make noise, but they pay no mind. "Bert... Yes. Ngh, fuck!" He exclaims, pushing his hips back against Bert's.

 

"Hell. Shit yeah." Bert fucks his hardest, squeezing onto Gerard's hip with one hand while the other one stays buried in Gerard's locks. "I love... You. I fucking love you." He pants, when Gerard's moans turn into breathy whines.

 

"I love you too... I love you, Bert." He lifts his head up and cranes his neck to look into Bert's eyes. 

 

They share a kiss, a neck aching kiss, but it doesn't matter.

 

"Gerard... Michael was looking for the Finding Nemo DVD-- HOLY SHIT!" Donna opens the door, but she's closing it as quickly as she opened it. "What in the world!?" She says behind the door.

 

Bert's pulling out of Gerard quickly, swearing loudly. "Fucking god!" His heart rate is touching the ceiling and he's watching Gerard hop off the bed and grab his clothes.

 

"Who is that Gerard?! Is that Bert?!" She hollers.

 

"Bert's here?" Donald's voice.

 

"Mom! IN A MINUTE!" Gerard shrieks, pulling his jeans on without bothering to put his underwear on first. "FUCK! DOESN'T ANYONE KNOCK ANYMORE?!" His face is red. Bert has never seen him so angry before.

 

Bert's got his boxers and T-shirt on and when they're both ready Gerard goes to answer the door; his hair sticking up in suspicious directions. "What?" He asks when he pulls his bedroom door open.

 

"You better drop the attitude. Who's in there?" Donna asks, trying to look over Gerard's shoulder 

 

"No one." Gerard says blatantly.

 

"I'm not fucking stupid. I saw. Is it Bert?"

 

Gerard's crossing his arms over his chest when his mother pushes him aside to walk in. "Why hello, Robert." She says fakely. "Gerard. Sit." She points to the bed.

 

"Uh... I'll leave..." Bert points to the balcony door.

 

"What's the rush. Let's talk." She takes a seat on the bed; her eyes go to the tube of lube on the night stand.

 

"Mom, it's none of your business." Gerard says; his tone stern.

 

Donald's walking in, glaring at Bert. "What's going on here?"

 

"I just walked in on our son and his ex boyfriend having sex." Donna says, pushing her hair back off her shoulders. "No big deal." She says sarcastically, shrugging her shoulders.

 

Donald's eyes go wide and he gazes at Gerard, a dissapointed glint in his stare.

 

"It's none of your fucking business!" Gerard shrieks, pulling Bert over to him by his hand. "We're back together."

 

"Bert, no offense..." Donna starts. "I'm holding myself back. Right now you're not on my good side. You put your hands on my baby. I shouldn't be sitting here as calmly as I am."

 

Donald's shaking his head, getting ready to walk out. He's had enough drama.

 

"I... I'm sorry Mrs. Way."

 

"Don't apologize to me."

 

"He already apologized to me." Gerard growls, "I love him."

 

"You don't." Donna shakes her head. "You're just attached. You lost your virginity to him."

 

Bert drops his head slightly and lets go of Gerard's hand. "You lost your virginity to dad... You two got married. You had me. You're happy."

 

"You don't know the half of it, baby." Donna stands up. "There will be no sex in my house. Do I make myself clear?"

 

"Yes, ma'am." Bert lifts his head to look Donna in the eyes. "I'm sorry."

 

She shakes her head and leaves the bedroom, her last gaze on Gerard.

 

When her foot steps disappear Gerard drops himself on his bed. "Fuck them." He says harshly. "Fucking ass holes. They think they can tell us what to do."

 

"Y'should listen to your mom, babe... She's right. I'm surprised she didn't kick me out." Bert sighs. "I mean, I'm such a dick. I don't know why you're still with me."

 

"Shut up. Please... Shut the fuck up." Gerard glares at him. "Come here." Bert takes a seat next to Gerard and looks into his eyes. "Give me your hand."

 

Bert sticks his hand out for Gerard to take. "What are you--?"

 

Gerard presses Bert's hand against his belly and holds it there. "We have this... This baby we made together. I'm not leaving you and you aren't leaving me. This is our promise. This baby is the deed, okay?"

 

"That's kind of fucked up." Bert shakes his head, moving his hand away. "I liked to think we'd always be together. Baby or not."

 

"I know, but the baby's gonna' make that will stronger, Bert. I know it is... I can't wait until we find out the sex and name it and... And buy clothes. I want to paint the bedroom when we get a house together. I want us to be parents. Good parents." Gerard smiles. "You'll make a great dad."

 

Bert purses his lips and scratches the back of his neck. "I'm not sure if I... I'll be good enough."

 

"Babe. You will. You are." Gerard grabs Bert's hand. "You're perfect. I can't wait until he or she is born because I really want 'em to meet you."

 

"...Their daddy...?" Bert wipes his eyes.

 

"Their fucking world."

 

"I have to get a job... To... To buy the things the baby will need." Bert presses his hand against Gerard's stomach. "Fuck... I'm gonna' be a dad... A fucking Father." He starts to think about it more. A baby... A person is going to look up to him, cry for him, and call him dad.

 

"Don't worry about the job right now, babe... It's nine months from now." Gerard shakes his head slowly. "We've got time. Worry 'bout school, s'your last year."

 

"No, I need a job now. I wanna' get an apartment... For me and you... And the baby. We'll be a family." Bert pulls Gerard into his lap. "I cant wait." He's pressing small kisses against Gerard's cheek.

 

"I cant wait either... It's going to be perfect..."

*

Gerard wakes up the next morning, his shirt's above his belly and Bert's hand is pressed against it, his palm flat out and cupping the small bump there.

 

"Bert..." Gerard calls out as he pulls his shirt down and moves Bert's sweaty hand aside.

 

"M'wha--?" He groans, rolling onto his side, facing opposite from Gerard. 

 

"It's late... It's one in the afternoon." He pushes his bangs back away from his eyes and stands up. "Fuck... Mikey has a game today."

 

"Baseball...?" Bert asks, sitting up slightly.

 

"Yeah. At three..." He slips his slippers on and leaves the room.

 

He can hear his parents talking in the kitchen. 

 

"I don't know what to tell him, Don. He doesn't seem to understand that Bert acts to... Too young. He doesn't act his age. Gerard doesn't need this boy supporting him. He can find someone else." Donna says, her voice sharp.

 

"Well, Donna, if Bert agrees to helping raise the baby there's not much we can do. He's the father. Just leave 'em be. They'll figure it out." Donald flips the pancake he's cooking and smiles at his wife.

 

"All Bert manages to do right is fuck him. I feel like that's all he does. He doesn't take Gerard out, they're not allowed to be at his house, he doesn't have a job. I don't see how it's possible to raise a baby in that kind of atmosphere." Donna paces back and forth. "You had a job, your parent's loved me, and you took me every where."

 

"It's not about us, Donna. It's about our pregnant son. If he wants to be with this boy then let him. They seem like they really care for each other."

 

"Care." Donna scoffs. "Caring is not enough. What about the baby's food, clothes, home?"

 

"We can help with all that. We've got the money."

 

"Not for the rest of our lives. When do you think Bert'll get his own life?"

 

Gerard walks down the stairs and into the kitchen.

 

"Gerard, good morning." Donald greets, smiling.

 

"G'morning, dad." Gerard goes through the fridge and pulls out the carton of juice.

 

He acts like his mother isn't even there and when he's got his glass filled with juice he leaves the carton at the table and walks off.

 

When it's two thirty everyone gathers in the van and drive off to Mikey's game, where he was already at, practicing.

 

"So..." Donald started, strapping on his seat belt as Donna drives down the road. "You decided on what you two are gonna' do?" He looks back and watches as Bert keeps his hand on Gerard's belly, caressing him there.

 

"Yeah," Gerard nods. "Bert's getting a job. He already knows the manager at the pizza joint down the street. They're close." 

 

"That's great!" Donald cheers, nodding his head.

 

"A pizza joint?" Donna repeats. "You're not going to college, Bert?"

 

"My parent's already have that covered. I'll be going to the University of New Jersey. I wanna' be an engineer. The pizza joint is just for the meantime. Gottah start somewhere, right?" Bert exclaims and Donald nods in agreement.

 

Gerard keeps his legs crossed and his hands folded in Bert's lap as he glares at the back of his moms head. "He's getting an apartment as soon as he graduates high school... We're gonna' live together." He blurts out and Donna rolls her eyes.

 

"It's good you boys have a plan. It'll work out. If anything you have us." Donald speaks to both of them.

 

"Thanks dad." Gerard smiles. 

 

"No problem."

 

They make it to the game ten minutes early and when Mikey spots them he waves, his pale hand high in the air. "Hey, sweety!" Donna shouts out and Mikey blushes.

 

"Don't embarrass him." Donald chuckles, grabbing Donna's hand.

 

Bert and Gerard go to the empty bleachers, where the screaming parents wont be and they kiss. They hold each others faces and kiss. Gerard can feel his mom glaring at them, but it doesn't matter. He's happy with Bert.

 

"I can't wait until the baby starts kicking." Gerard smiles against Bert's mouth. "You'll be the first one to feel it."

 

"After you of course." Bert grins, "I cant keep my hand off your belly," he moves his hand against Gerard's bump for the billionth time that day. "It's hard for me to stay away because I know our baby's in there... Growing."

 

Gerard falls in love with Bert even more (if that's possible) every time he says things like that. "I know... You don't have to keep away, baby. You can touch as much as you like. You're the daddy."

 

Bert beams and presses a small peck on Gerard's lips, "I love you."

 

Gerard knows it's true, so he says it back, "I love you too."


	8. Pause

Bert goes home that night with Gerard's hand in his. 

 

His parents are most likely asleep, or watching television.

 

When they're inside he takes Gerard up stairs and into his bedroom. "I think they're asleep..." Bert whispers, pressing his ear against the wall. "Yeah, I hear dad snoring."

 

Gerard smiles weakly at him and takes a seat on the neat bed. "Looks like we can't finish what my mom interrupted."

 

"Says who?" Bert grins, sitting down next to Gerard. "We can still... Y'know..."

 

"What do you wanna' do?" Gerard grins, running his fingers through Bert's short blond hair. 

 

"I want your mouth around my cock. If that's okay with you, I mean." Bert's light eyes twinkle when he sees Gerard nod. "I'll give you one too... After."

 

"Yeah, okay. We haven't done this before so... So I won't be that good." Gerard reminds him, pressing a kiss against Bert's throat.

 

"I know, baby. We're exploring... You'll get better, and so will I." Bert nods and Gerard smiles at him. "God, I'm so damn lucky." Bert devours Gerard's lips in a kiss.

 

"Why?" Gerard whispers when the kiss is broken

 

"Because... I have you," he says, leaning in to kiss Gerard again.

 

They make out for quite some time. They make noises that indicate the other is doing something right and when Bert starts to pull Gerard's jeans down his hand grips onto Gerard's cock and runs his thumb across the tip; he shudders noticeably and Bert pulls away to push Gerard down until he's in between his legs; his face pressing against the crotch of Bert's jeans.

 

"M'fuck..." Bert groans when Gerard lowers his jeans down past his hips and sticks his hands in Bert's boxers to free him. 

 

Gerard strokes it up and down at first, slowly, familiarizing himself with Bert's manhood up front; he's quite impressed, really. He's seen porn's where the guys' cocks were almost too good to be true, but here he is, staring at his very own boyfriends cock and he's thinking the same thing; he needs to be proved wrong, so he shoves it into his mouth.

 

"Whoa, G... Slow down, you'll choke yourself." Bert tangles his hand in the back of Gerard's head, pulling him up. 

 

"Go slow... My cocks not going anywhere." He laughs. "Well, besides your mouth, so there's no point in rushing... You've got nothing to worry about."

 

"Sorry..." He tries again, starting with the head of Bert's cock, sucking on it and tasting the strong pre-come.

 

"M'that's better." Bert drops his head back and moves his finger tips against Gerard's scalp, moving his head up and down. 

 

Gerard decides to just keep his mouth open and let Bert do all the work, but his jaw starts to ache, so his mouth closes a bit--"SHIT!" Bert hisses, pulling himself out.

 

"Sorry!" Gerard shrieks, "I didn't mean to."

 

"Dude, teeth..." Bert strokes his cock and watches Gerard's worried face. "It's alright... You're doing fine, just... Just like, try and take it further...?"

 

"I'll try." Gerard allows Bert to grab his head and shove his cock inside his mouth.

 

He thinks back to the porn again, how the bottom guys sucked off the tops. They made it look so easy. How they have the top groaning and bucking their hips. Gerard needed to make Bert feel like that.

 

"Oh god..." Bert groans, watching Gerard's head move up and down his lap. "That's fucking--ah!" He hisses as Gerard takes him to the back of his throat.

 

He gags a little and pulls back until he's pressing the head of Bert's cock against the pucker of his lips, smearing the pre-come and moving his tongue against the shaft.

 

"God, you sure you haven't done this before?" Bert moves his hands from Gerard's head and circles it around his base. "Fuck, you're good."

 

"Nuh-uhhh." Gerard hums around his cock and pulls back. "I just taught myself." He smiles, showing his tongue to Bert, wiggling it. 

 

"Damn, you're a good self-teacher, baby," Bert's eyes move across his room, towards the poster of a famous super model wearing a bikini. Gerard's nagged him so many times to get rid of it, but his dad would get mad at him if he saw the wall empty... Hetero-less.

 

"Ahh!" He comes hard, moving his hands against his face.

 

Gerard stays put, his mouth stretched around his boyfriends cock.

 

"Shit, I'm sorry... I should have warned you. How's it taste?" Bert laughs halfheartedly as he watches Gerard pull away; his face scrunched up in disgust.

 

He shakes his head as some of it dribbles down his chin. "Dude, my sheets!" Bert shrieks as Gerard spits down into the palm of his hand.

 

"Damn, shit's strong," he whines, "What do you eat all the damn time to make it taste like that?" He's wiping the corners of his mouth.

 

"I don't know. You don't taste like that?"

 

"NO!"

 

"You've tasted yourself before?" Bert grins.

 

"... Haven't you... Ever, y'know, been curious?"

 

"No!" Bert laughs hard and loud as Gerard's face goes red. "I'm teasin', babe... Goddamn. You did good. Hopefully I can measure up. Get up real fast."

 

Gerard goes to the bathroom and washes his hand in the sink. "I'll pull out when I come!" Gerard hollers, but he doesn't get a respond. "Baby...?"

 

He's walking out the bathroom and sees Bert's parents standing across the room, in front of that poster of the bikini chick. "Uh, me and G are back together..." Bert says, glaring at his boyfriend.

 

"Yeah, we know. We heard you two!" Mrs. McCracken hollers, thrusting her hands on her hips. "What were you thinking, Robert? Bringing him here at this time?!" 

 

"Sorry, but his mom's totally trippin' at the moment so we wanted to--"

 

"SHUT IT!" Mr. McCracken screams, his face red, he's looking at Gerard, in Bert's boxers. "You two. What have you been doing?"

 

"N-nothing." Gerard shakes his head. Mr. McCracken scared him shitless. 

 

"Don't fucking lie to me, you son-of-a-whore!" Mr. McCracken, points at him and he shrinks a little.

 

"DON'T FUCKING TALK TO HIM LIKE THAT!" The words leave Bert's mouth like a flash of lighting. Mr. McCracken's looking to his son; his eyes bulging out.

 

"Excuse me?"

 

"You heard me, dad. Don't talk to my fucking boyfriend like that! You wanna' know the truth...?" He's watching Gerard shake his head, his eyes pleading him to not say it. "He was sucking my dick."

 

Mrs. McCracken gasps; her hand flying to cover her mouth in shock.

 

"We lost our virginity to each other."

 

"NONSENSE!" Mr. McCracken hollers, "NO! YOU ARE A SON OF GOD!"

 

"No, dad... I'm not. I'm Gerard's boyfriend... And before you came in I was about to suck his dick. Accept me for who I am, or I'm gone." Bert gets up, pushing his blankets aside.

 

"ROBERT!" Mrs. McCracken covers her eyes as Bert's cock sticks up and greets them.

 

Gerard's smiling, leaning against the bathrooms door-way. Bert was... Was leaving his parents to be with him.

 

"I'm out, fuck you guys." He slips his cargo pants on. "Come on, babe."

*

"I cant believe you did that!" Gerard hugs him once they're outside. 

 

They've got suitcases by their sides. Bert's suitcases.

 

Mrs. McCracken was crying hysterically, grabbing Bert's hand, telling him Gerard was stealing him away from them. Bert had replied with a simple: 'I know'. It only made her cry harder.

 

Mr. McCracken left to his office to be alone, to smoke or drink or kill himself. Which ever came first.

 

"I'm so fucking... Happy. I feel relieved." They start to walk down the street, approaching Gerard's house.

 

"Wouldn't it be better if we had our own place already? Oh my god. I can't wait!" Gerard smiles.

 

"Yeah, it would... It's gonna' be soon, babe. Don't worry about it." They make it to Gerard's two story house and enter the front door.

 

His family was most likely sleeping so they went up stairs as quietly as possible.

 

When they drop the suitcases on Gerard's ground Bert starts to pull Gerard to the bed. "I love you so much. So fucking much, babe."

 

"I love you too, Bert." Gerard's laying on top of him, his head on Bert's chest.

 

"I didn't get to suck you off..."

 

"It's okay, next time."

 

"How long is next time? We aren't allowed to do it here." Bert reminds him, moving his hands down the bump of Gerard's ass.

 

"It doesn't matter. We weren't allowed to do it in your house either, that's for fucking sure." Gerard laughs, kissing the dip of Bert's chin. "You really liked how I did it?"

 

"Yeah, fuck yeah... Well, up until you bit my cock..." Bert cackles. "I'm kidding, you're good. Too good... You sure you haven't done it before?"

 

"I'm sure... Have you gotten head before?"

 

"Uh, yeah... A couple times. Before we were together of course." 

 

"Oh... From who?" Gerard interrogates, rolling off of Bert.

 

"Uh, no one. It doesn't matter... You're way better." Bert says, shaking his head.

 

"Um, okay... Definitely before we were together, though... Right?" Gerard asks again--to make sure.

 

"Yeah. Of course." Bert nods.

 

"Alright... D'you wanna' go make something to eat...?" 

 

The two boys are in the kitchen, making burgers, they're making sure to be quiet, "I remember, like, when we first met... I totally thought you were this ice queen, sort of. You were totally bitchy." Bert laughs, sticking his finger into his mouth, licking the mayonnaise.

 

"I was not." Gerard laughs, shaking his head. "I was just a little bitter. You did refer to me as 'the guy who blew the foot-ball team'. Wasn't very nice."

 

"It was an honest mistake! I now know to not believe what everyone says. Especially the foot-ball team."

 

"They use to talk about me to you?"

 

"Well, sometimes... Like, when we'd walk pass you when you're sitting under that tree next to hall 5-B." Bert shrugs, taking a seat at the dining table. "It doesn't matter. They're dicks. I don't really talk to them much anymore anyway."

 

"Tell me what they'd say. Please." Gerard turns off the stove.

 

"Babe, c'mon. I cant remember."

 

"Don't lie to me. I know they're dicks, but is it wrong for me to wanna' know?"

 

Bert's silent for a moment before he opens his mouth. "Jeffery said... That when you're older you'll be a druggie-whore with aids, just like all the other gays. His words not mine."

 

"Jeffery. He said that?" Gerard laughs; he laughs when he's mad. "Isn't his mom a former-prostitute and doesn't his dad deal coke?"

 

"Uh, yeah..."

 

"I think he has a better chance to end up like that, don't you?" Gerard scoffs, shaking his head. "What was your respond to that."

 

"I told him get a good look at you, because in a few years your face will be everywhere." Bert says honestly. "I don't take you for granted just because your quiet. It's always the quiet ones that become something because they focus on themselves and not on everyone else."

 

Gerard's smiling, turning around and tucking a strand of hair behind his ears. "Really? You said that?"

 

"Duh, I've always liked you... I just didn't have the balls to approach you. I thought you would have like, shot me down." Bert moves to the fridge and grabbed a carton of juice. "I'm happy Mikey introduced us."

 

"Me too." Gerard grabs the plates and moves them to the dining table. "I love you."

 

"I love you too, G."

 

They eat and talk and when they're done Gerard's taking their plates to the sink.

 

"Hey, Bert." Mikey chirps, walking into the kitchen with his beanie on his head and his footsy-pajamas on. "I thought I heard you guys talking."

 

"Hey, buddy!" Bert goes to pick him up. "We were just talking about you!"

 

"Really?" Mikey asks, whilst having Bert kiss his cheek.

 

"Yeah, really really." Gerard giggles, watching Bert set him down gently. "New beanie, huh? I like the color red on you, little man."

 

"Thanks." Mikey grins.

 

"You hungry, Mikes?" Bert goes to the pantry and pulls out a can of raviolis. 

 

"Nope. I ate before I went to bed. Mom cooked lasagna." He smiles.

 

"That's cool." Bert shoves the can back into the closet.

 

"G." Mikey calls out and Gerard turns to look at him. "I heard mom talking..."

 

"Yeah... About?"

 

"She said that you're pregnant. Am I going to be an uncle?"

 

Bert smiles before he goes to kiss Gerard's cheek; he lets his hands go down to cup Gerard's belly. "It's true." Bert nods. "We're gonna' be daddies."

 

"That's so cool!" Mikey exclaims, "Can I play with him when he's born?"

 

Gerard moves his hand over Bert's. "It can be a girl, Mikey." Gerard reminds him.

 

"Oh... Well, can I play with her-him when they're born?" He rephrases.

 

"Of course." Bert moves away and goes to get on his knees in front of Mikey. "We'll even let you choose him-hers name."

 

Mikey glares at Gerard; his eyes twinkling, "Really?!"

 

"Yeah, of course! Right, baby?" Bert looks back to his boyfriend.

 

"Yeah, it's fine with me. Nothing from a cartoon though." Gerard laughs, looking down at his boyfriend and little brother. 

 

He didn't want that moment to end.


	9. Family Values

Bert wakes up that morning hearing Gerard in the bathroom—throwing up. At first he lets his eyes adjust to the brightness of the room and then he gets up, stretching his arms up and pulling his shorts on. 

 

"Babe, you okay?" Bert pushes the door open a crack to see Gerard on his knees, his face shoved into the toilet; he's naked from the waist down. 

 

They had sex again that night. Really slow, soft, romantic sex. Bert was starting to believe that all he and Gerard manage do is have sex, like Donna said.

 

"I'm... I'm fin—" He's puking again, his body tensing up and his hand clutching the rim of the toilet bowl.

 

Bert goes to tuck Gerard's hair back behind his ears and pat his back. "Fucking sucks... When's the vomiting gonna' stop?" He asks, helping Gerard up once he finishes. 

 

"I don't know..." He wipes his mouth with his arm and walks out the bathroom, shaking his head. "What time is it?"

 

"Like... Seven... We got school today." Bert reminds him and Gerard groans. "Wanna' stay today?"

 

"I... I should go." Gerard pulls his briefs on and then his X-men pajama bottoms. "I can't miss anymore assignments..."

 

"I'll bring it all to you, babe. Stay. I don't want you to stress."

 

"I'd have to ask my mom. I think she's mad at me though, so I'm not sure if she'll say yes." Gerard shrugs, taking a seat on his bed.

 

"You look a little rounder today." Bert points out. "Well, your belly kind of looks less flat."

 

"My mom's force feeding me... Well, it's a bunch of vegetables and fruits and water and stuff." Gerard says, pressing his hand against the hardly noticeable pouch. "It's gonna' be weird when it's all big."

 

Bert nods in agreement. "You'll still be going to school, right? I mean, what's everyone gonna' say?"

 

"I don't give a shit, Bert. I really don't. There's a group of pregnant chicks at our school and no one gives them shit." Gerard sighs, "If anyone's got something to say then can say it to my goddamn face."

 

"They wouldn't dare say it to me. I'd knock them flat, G. I'm the dad." Bert pulls Gerard into a kiss. "You'll have me."

 

"I know..."

 

Donna walks in a few moments later while Bert's grabbing his things and Gerard's laying in bed; his laptop up to his chest as he searches the web about pregnancy.

 

"What's going on here?" She glares over to the suitcases. "What happened?"

 

"Good morning, Donna." Bert greets her, "I left my parents house. Um, they... They were talking down to Gerard again and I couldn't put up with it." He says simply.

 

Gerard sits up and pushes the computer aside.

 

"Uh..." She pauses. "You'll be staying... Here, then, right?" 

 

"Not for too long. I'll probably move in with Dan or something. I don't want to be trouble." Bert smiles weakly. "I'm about to leave for school. G's staying because he's got a bit of morning sickness. I'm bringing his work back though."

 

"You're not suspended?" Donna crosses her arms.

 

"Um, no. My dad... Talked the school out of it. Some how. I don't know." 

 

"Sly mother fucker." Donna leaves the room, shaking her head.

 

"I like your mom." Bert laughs.

 

Gerard rolls his eyes and brings the computer back to his face. "I'm reading shit on pregnancy and it says I'm gonna' be moody. Be ready for that... Oh and I'm gonna' be pissing like hell... And eating weird shit... And we're gonna' see libido changes. Great shit, right?" Gerard's eyes move to look at Bert.

 

"Cant wait." Bert smiles. "I'm gonna' be a dad."

 

"I'm gonna' give birth... What the fuck'll that feel like? Like, I'm gonna' have an ass baby." Gerard shudders.

 

"Nuh-uh!" Bert laughs. "C-section, dude."

 

"My doctor said anal entrance... Or exit... Or what ever." Gerard explains. "I'm gonna' push a baby out of my ass," he says in defeat.

 

"Might not have too, babe. That's fucking physically impossible."

 

"We don't know that. I'm the first pregnant man, Bert. It might be possible." The younger boy reminds him, and he's right, Bert doesn't know what's possible and what's impossible. At least not with a situation like this.

 

"What if... What if you die." Bert swings his back pack over his shoulder. "I mean, what if... You lose so much blood and the baby... The baby can't get out, or if it's too much for y—"

 

"I don't know... They're gonna' run tests at the hospital. I'm running around in the dark right now, babe." Gerard sniffs. "Plus, I rather not think about any of that. I know the baby's going to be healthy and so am I."

 

Bert leaves after he kisses Gerard on the lips one final time. He lays in bed, thinking about his and Bert's conversation. He knows those questions lead to no answers... Yet.

 

Gerard wakes up to a small rap at his door and his Father walking in, a bowl of chicken soup in his hands. "Good morning." He smiles, taking a seat on Gerard's desk chair. "I made you and baby something to eat."

 

Gerard inhales the seasoned smell of the soup and sits up, moving his hair back off his sweaty face. "Thanks, dad." He croaks.

 

Donald passes him the bowl and sits back to watch Gerard eat. "I spoke to your mother and she's a bit concerned... About you and Bert."

 

Gerard shakes his head whilst dipping his spoon back into the bowl. "She has nothing to be concerned about. Bert's the man I'm gonna' raise my baby with. She needs to realize that."

 

"But hear me out." Donald leans in, resting his hand on Gerard's knee. "You're both so... So very young and this is a situation like no other. Some things can happen. Bert's ambitious. I can see that and I know he's happy about the baby, but... He's young, he'll want to explore."

 

"What are you saying? That he'll leave me and the baby? Dad, whose side are you on? Bert loves me and I love him. Mom needs to mind her own fucking business. I'm tired of it." He sets the bowl of soup down on his night stand and crawls out of bed. 

 

"She's your mom, Gerard. She's only thinking about you."

 

"No, she's thinking about herself and how I'm in the same situation she was in." He goes to the bathroom and shuts the door, locking it behind him.

 

He hears Donald sigh and then say, "I love you and I'm even starting to worry... You're both bright and I know you love each other, but..." He pauses, "I just have this feeling." Donald leans against the bathroom door. 

 

"Your feeling is wrong." Gerard snaps.

 

"Alright... So, if I'm not?" 

 

"Then..." Gerard thinks about the possibility. "Then I'll raise the baby alone."

 

"Not alone." Donald whispers, "You have me and your mom." He's walking away not giving Gerard the chance to respond to Donald's statement.


	10. Support

Bert's coming back from school at around three and Gerard's opening the front door for him. His dad left for work at about one and his mom went to take Mikey to a birthday party; he had the house to himself, well, now he and Bert had the house to themselves.

 

"The band's called 'The Used'... I like it. Quinn's on guitar and Jepha's playing bass and Dan's the drummer." Bert sits in front of the television screen, playing Xbox. "I sang like a chorus of this one song we fucked around with in homeroom and I'm in. I'm the singer."

 

"You sing? I didn't know that." Gerard says, munching on a bag of chips. "I mean, I know you play piano and shit, so do I, but... Can you sing me a song?"

 

"Yeah, but... I want to wait until we sing at that gig Quinn got. It's in that bar downtown called "Night Shift". It's pretty rad. S'been there with Jepha and Dan."

 

"That's great, baby." Gerard kisses his cheek.

 

"Whoa, slow down on the junk." Bert snatches the half empty bag of Doritos from Gerard's hands. 

 

"I'm really hungry and I'm in the mood for like, Spaghetti and chocolate ice cream."

 

"Oh, like... Spaghetti for dinner and ice cream for dessert?" Bert grabs a handful of the cheesy chips.

 

"Uh, no... I want the ice cream on top of the spaghetti like, instead of spaghetti sauce." Gerard says, shrugging his shoulders. "I mean, I can smell it practically."

 

"Oh my god... You're craving!" Bert cackles.

 

"Yeah, hard core." Gerard stands up and goes to the kitchen. 

 

"What would you say..." He hears Bert say; his voice meek and hesitant. "If I told you I change my mind about going to college."

 

Gerard's brows furrow together. He walks back into the living room and leans against the wall. "Why?"

 

"I don't know... I have a good feeling about this band, babe. It's... I've been waiting for something like this." Bert turns off his game and stands up. "You'll see what I mean when I play at the bar. You'll agree and I know you'll support me."

 

"I support you now, but... You need another choice. A back-up plan, Bert. I'm pregnant with your child. I can't get a job. I need... I need you to help me." Gerard notes, his brows still deeply furrowed in confusion. 

 

He couldn't understand what Bert was trying to tell him... 'I wanna' throw away my career and future to be a famous rock star'. To Gerard that was a one in a million chance. Chance can happen, but how often?

 

"I know what you're thinking." Bert swings his arms before he clasps them together. "Jepha's dad knows the music producer for the Alternative label 'Burn out'. I'm gonna' be touring and... And making money. Real money to keep you and our baby happy."

 

"Bert... It's just... I don't know. Um, if you think..." Gerard stutters. "I guess you can... Try?"

 

Bert's arms are going around his boyfriends waist, pulling him into a hug. "I knew you'd understand." He whispers into Gerard's ear. "God, I'm so lucky to have you."

 

Gerard's body stiffens. He doesn't feel like anything good will come from this.

 

*

 

"It's called... 'The Used'. Whatever that means." Gerard murmurs to his mother.

 

"A band called 'The Used'..." She echoes. "I can see it already. He'll make it half way, but it'll all crash and burn because of drugs."

 

"Bert's not like that, mom," he starts cutting up carrots, "I just... I was surprised when he told me. I didn't know he can sing, or that he was interested in being in a band. He never talked to me about that. He's always been interested with engineering and... Math and money. I don't know..." He shrugs, dropping the carrots in the pot.

 

Donna hums quietly to her self before she speaks, "We'll see what happens."

 

*

 

"DINNER!" Donna calls out and Donald, Mikey, and Bert come walking down stairs. "Gerard and I made roast with broccoli and garlic bread."

 

"Oh shit... Damn." Bert hisses, looking down at the made dining table. "I'm allergic to garlic."

 

"Oh, yeah, that's right... Make sure to not eat the bread then." Gerard takes his seat and Bert goes to sit next to him. 

 

"Out of luck, Bert. I sprinkled garlic powder on the roast. I don't think you'll be okay just eating broccoli and plain white rice. Want me to order you a pizza... Chinese?" Donna goes to the house phone.

 

"Um, sure... A pizza'll be fine." Bert nods, standing up.

 

"Where are you going?" Gerard asks, watching Bert make his way towards the staircase.

 

"I was writing a song... Y'know, before your mom called us down." Bert explains and Gerard excuses himself from the table.

 

"How long is it gonna' take?" He whispers into Bert's ear.

 

"How long is what gonna' take? The writing?"

 

"Yes, the writing." Gerard replies.

 

"Uh, well, I've got a few songs to work on. Quinn emailed me some rough drafts and Dan's working on this chorus and I have to finish the verse." Bert annotates, nodding his head frantically.

 

"Okay..." Gerard turns around without another word. 

 

When Bert's pizza gets there he goes down stairs and answers the door and pays the guy before he goes back up stairs.

 

When Gerard's done with his dinner he goes to his room, resting his hand against his stomach. He feels like he ate a horse, like his body feels heavy. Heavier.

 

He's pushing open his bedroom door and when he walks in he closes it behind himself, locking it as well. "I wish you weren't allergic to garlic. It was so good, babe." Gerard drops down on his bed next to Bert, who was laying on his back against the head board, scribbling down in a note book. 

 

"It smelt really good. It's cool though. I enjoyed my Hawaiian-ham." He points to the desk, the half empty pizza box open and spreading it's aroma around the room.

 

"S'good to know..."

 

They're silent for a moment before Gerard rolls onto his back and lays his hand on his stomach. "I've got an appointment for the doctor after school tomorrow..."

 

"Really?" Bert asks, moving his hand to push Gerard's bangs back. "Ultra sound...?"

 

"Um, no... They're gonna' figure out how the baby's gonna'... Y'know, enter this world. I'm scared shitless. I think they're going to have to look down there." He blushes, shaking his head.

 

"Wanna' rehearse? I can be the Doctor." Bert jokes and Gerard laughs, shaking his head. "It'll be okay, man. Don't worry."

 

"Will... You be there with me?" Gerard whispers, resting his head on Bert's chest. "For support."

 

"Don't even have to ask." Bert smiles.


	11. Mommy

Gerard and Bert go to school hand in hand and people are staring, wondering what the hell happened, and how they got back together.

 

"We're back together, obviously." Bert tells everyone, "Is it really that much of a surprise to anyone? Gerard and I are meant to be. We can't live without each other."

 

Quinn coos mockingly, "Awwwe! That's so romantic," he pokes Gerard's arm.

 

"Ain't it?" Bert laughs, going through his locker.

 

"It's cool you two settled your differences. S'good for the baby and all... How many weeks are you?" Dan asks, flicking his bangs away from his eyes.

 

"five weeks... I think." Gerard nods, holding his books to his chest. "I'm going to the hospital after school today to figure some things out."

 

"Like... Who the father is?" Jepha cuts in, hiding his smirk. 

 

Bert glares at him as Gerard tips his head to the side. "S'that supposed to be a joke?" Bert asks, crossing his arms over his chest. "Because it wasn't very funny."

 

"I was kidding, man." Jepha chuckles, shaking his head. 

 

"Uh, I'm going to the hospital for tests... Like, where the baby's gonna' come out of and... And if it's safe. I don't know. They didn't say much." Gerard shrugs, leaning back against Bert's locker.

 

Everyone who passes by glances at him and talk in hushed whispers. They're talking about him, most likely saying: 'He's the weird pregnant boy...'

 

He's surprised with himself because he doesn't really care about what people say about him anymore.

 

"S'all cool though, we'll find out when we get there." Bert shuts his locker closed and grabs the back of Gerard's neck and kisses him on the mouth. "See you at lunch, babe."

 

"M'bye..." Gerard hums into the kiss.

 

When they part Bert, Jepha, Quinn, and Dan all leave in the opposite direction.

 

Lunch time is at around ten and when they're released from their classrooms Gerard's walking down the hall, clutching onto his messenger bag. He's starting to feel self conscious because in all three classes it's been nothing but staring and questions and then more staring. He didn't like the attention.

 

"Hey, G! Over here!" Bert hollers, waving his arms in the air.

 

Gerard feels better suddenly, when he goes over to his boyfriend and kisses him on the lips. "Hey, I missed you." Gerard smiles, hugging him.

 

"You too. Hey, I was gonna' leave campus to get somethin' to eat. What do you want?" Bert grabs his wallet from his pants. "Burger Bitch... Shitshi Town...? D'you want some Taco Hell," he jokes and the guys around laugh obnoxiously at the nicknames Bert gave the fast food restaurant.

 

"Uh..." Gerard giggles, shaking his head at Bert's immaturity.

 

"I'm down for some Burger King," he says, taking a seat on the bench under the tree they were gathered around. "Can't you get Dan to go get it. I don't want you to leave me."

 

"Mhm, sure... Let me go ask 'im." Bert turns around and makes his way to his oldest friend. 

 

Gerard sits there, tapping his hands against the table. He feels eyes on him, a lot of eyes and when he turns to see his face is close to Sam's.

 

"Hey!" She chirps.

 

"Sam, hey." Gerard smiles, moving back a bit, away from the girl. "What's up?"

 

"I should be asking! You're back together with Bert, I knew it!" She bounces on the bench. "Dude I heard this weird ass rumor too... They're saying your preggers and shit. S'weird. You're like the school's gossip column."

 

"Uh, s'not a rumor... It's true." Gerard swallows the lump in the back of his throat. "I didn't believe it at first either, but I'm a month pregnant so far."

 

"Dude... No fucking way! Seriously?" She asks; she's waiting for Gerard's expression to change. "Dude! That's... That's so AWESOME!"

 

"Awesome?" Gerard laughs, confused with Sam's excitement. "No... It's not. It's terrifying."

 

"No, I mean... It's cool. You're like a mutant and shit... Like X-Men."

 

"Nah, I'm just a different kind of hermaphrodite. Just slightly different." Gerard shrugs.

 

"Slightly? Dude... You've got a dick, right? You've got semen, right? You have no boobs and no vagina... You're a guy, but you've got a womb. Oh my god. It's Bert's isn't it?" She blabbers.

 

"Yeah," Gerard nods, cringing when his stomach growls.

 

"You hungry?" She asks, looking down. "Or was that the baby?"

 

Gerard laughs loudly and shakes his head, "I'm starving. Bert's getting Dan to go get some lunch."

 

"Sweet... Babys gottah eat." She smiles. "I'm gonna' go talk to Jam. We're thinking about starting a band. Peace out, mommy." She waves, getting up to leave.

 

"Bye." Gerard waves, watching her walk away.

 

"Jepha decided to go get lunch." Bert says, walking over and sitting down next to Gerard. "You can wait a while, right? If you're hungry I'll go buy you a bag of chips." Bert insists, but Gerard shakes his head.

 

"A couple more classes to go then we're out of here, babe." Bert throws his arm over Gerard's shoulder.

 

"I know, it's kind of over whelming. I wanna' just go to the hospital now." Gerard sighs, leaning his head down on Bert's shoulder.

 

"I know..."

 

Jepha arrives with four bags filled with food and passes Bert and Gerard there's. "They didn't have the tea you wanted so I got you a diet coke. S'okay?" He asks Gerard.

 

"Of course. Thanks, Jeph." Gerard takes a bite out of his chicken sandwich.

 

"We gottah hurry up and eat. Lunch is done in like, ten minutes." Quinn tosses some fries into his mouth. 

 

"Awe, my milkshake is all melted." Dan groans, taking a sip.

 

"I had the top down on the car. The sun was blazing, dude. I think I got a farmers tan." Jepha cackles, grabbing a handful of his fries.

 

Bert's laughing loudly, dumping a nugget into the little BBQ container and pushes it into Gerard's mouth. "S'why I didn't ask for a milkshake."

 

They finish the rest of the day and Gerard doesn't feel the urge to puke all over the place again... No, if anything he's hungry again and it's killing him.

 

When Donna picks them up from school Gerard's getting into the back. "Sit in the passenger seat, Bert." Donna says, watching Gerard strap his seat belt on. "You two need breathing space."

 

"No we don't." Gerard mutters, flicking his hair away from his eyes. "We're gonna' be moving in together soon."

 

"More of a reason to keep away from one another." She starts up the road. "Your father and I talked... We decided that Bert's going to sleep downstairs."

 

"Why?" Gerard shoots, jutting his chin forward.

 

"You know why."

 

Bert folds his hands in his laps and looks back at Gerard, "It's cool, G. It's your parents house. We gottah obey their rules."

 

"It's bullshit. You're acting like Bert's parents, mom!" Gerard argues, crossing his arms over his chest. "S'not fucking fair!"

 

"Hey! No dirty language when you're speaking to me! It's for your own good." She makes a sharp turn. "You're lucky I even allow him being in the house in the first place."

 

"C'mon, dude..." Gerard rolls his eyes. "It's not a big deal. We've already had sex. What's the point in separating us now? Should have thought of that before."

 

Bert glares at him, "Babe, respect your mom."

 

"You're one to talk." 

 

The rest of the care ride home is quiet and when Donna pulls into the drive way Gerard's hopping out and rushing to the front door.

 

"Gerard." Bert calls out, rolling his eyes, "C'mon, babe... It's not a big deal!"

 

"It's not FAIR!" He screams, running into the house. 

 

"Let him throw a fit, he's hormonal." laughs Donna, shaking her head. "God, he reminds me of myself when I was his age," she's walking into the house and when Bert enters he sees Mikey sitting on the couch, watching T.V.

 

"Hi Bert." Mikey waves to the older boy.

 

"Hey, Mike's." Bert waves back before he runs up the stairs to catch Gerard.

 

"Leave me alone!" Gerard screams, slamming his bedroom door shut.

 

"G, it's me... Bert. Open up." Bert says quietly.

 

The sound of the door unlocking echoes, but the door doesn't open. 

 

Bert's walking in without question; he sees Gerard on his bed, laying on his front with his head squished into his pillow, "Right where I want you!" Bert laughs, throwing himself on the bed and rolled over on top of Gerard. 

 

"I love your body." Bert whispers into Gerard's ear, "your little butt..." His hands move lower. "Oops-- I mean, your big butt," he makes grabby hands against Gerard's ass.

 

"Stop it..." His voice is muffled behind the pillow.

 

"Say we have a girl, babe." Bert moves his hands up to Gerard's head and starts running his fingers through the younger boys hair. "I think she'll be beautiful mainly because of you... I wouldn't want her coming out to look like me."

 

"Why?" Gerard sniffs, still behind his pillow.

 

"Well," he starts, "I'm not very beautiful to begin with..."

 

Gerard snorts, "Yeah, you are," he's turning his head to the side.

 

"You're too kind." Bert laughs, "I've got a favor to ask you."

 

"M'what's that?"

 

"Go apologize to your mommy." 

 

"No fucking way. She needs to apologize to me. She was totally out of line, man." Gerard sits up when Bert moves off of him. "Telling us to sleep separately, fuck her. She's a fucking bitch."

 

Bert shakes his head, "No, she's not. You're the one acting like a fucking bitch. You have a good mom and she accepts you no matter what. You're lucky to have her, because look at me... I have no one."

 

Gerard chews on his bottom lip and lets out a deep sigh of frustration.

 

"Go apologize. She's the one taking you to your appointment anyway's." Bert's hopping off the bed and turning to leave through the bedroom door. 

 

Gerard sits there silently, debating with himself before he finally gets up and goes to tell his mom he's sorry.


	12. Broken Promises

Gerard fiddles with his fingers when he leaves his bedroom. He can hear his mother in the kitchen talking with Mikey about why he should eat all his vegetables; they'll make him big and strong and healthy...

 

Bert's coughing is coming from the living room and when Gerard turns into the hall way Bert glances at him and kind of nods his head towards the kitchen. 

 

Gerard nods back and starts walking in. "One more bite." Donna watches Mikey stick the broccoli into his mouth.

 

"Hey, G." Mikey says, his mouth full of food, when he sees his brother walk in apprehensively.

 

"Hey, Mikey..."

 

Donna turns and glares at Gerard before she goes back and puts her focus back on Mikey. "Want some juice?" She asks, going to the fridge when Mikey nods.

 

"Mom," Gerard's voice cracks slightly, "Can we talk?" He coughs to clear his throat.

 

"Yeah, Gerard, go ahead." 

 

Gerard sat at the dining table by Mikey and pet the little boy's head affectionately. "I want to apologize for being so bratty lately. I'm not going to blame it on the hormones either, but I do feel like you think my anger is being directed specifically to you, but that's not true. I've been like this with everyone and I'm sorry. I'll try and control myself."

 

Donna's coming from the fridge and pours Mikey some juice in his Spiderman cup. "It's alright, baby." Donna smiles weakly. "I know what you're going through. Pregnancy is tough, but you'll be alright."

 

Gerard sits there silently until Bert walks in; his cell phone against his ear. 

 

"Dude, fuckin' seriously?" He sounds ecstatic, like he'd just took like a bunch of happy pills... Which Gerard totally needs. "What time's it gonna' be?"

 

Gerard's letting Bert kiss the side of his throat when he bends over behind him. "Who're you talking to?" Gerard asks, watching Bert pull away and walk around the kitchen enthusiastically.

 

Bert holds a finger at him and continues to talk, "Fuck, tonight, dude? G's going for an appointment for the baby. Can we like, do it midnight?" 

 

Gerard finds himself even more intrigued with the conversation when he hears what Bert says. "Man, I don't think I can. I told him I'd go with him," he leaves the kitchen and Gerard gets up to follow him.

 

"Tell them you can't make it wherever they're telling you to go." Gerard butts in and Bert gazes at him.

 

"Yeah, that's Gerard... Dude, I'll talk to you later. Peace out," he flips his phone shut and lets out a deep sigh of frustration.

 

"Jepha got a gig for us down at that rock club a bunch of people always go to. They wanted to do it tonight." Bert dropped himself down on the couch and shook his head in disappointment. 

 

"You're not going, right?" Gerard went to go sit next to his boyfriend. "You said you'd go with me to the doctors before they even told you about this."

 

"Fuck, Gerard. I'm deciding to not go to college because of this band and I'm already canceling my first gig and the baby isn't even out yet... S'causing problems already." The words shoot Gerard in the chest and Bert's regretting ever saying it as soon as it left his mouth.

 

"I didn't mean it like that." He shakes his head slowly, "I meant, I want us to be happy no matter what. We need a win-win situation."

 

"Don't come then... Go to your 'gig', or whatever. It's more important to you anyway." Gerard starts to walk up stairs, but Bert's marching after him.

 

"It's not more important to me, G. You are! It's just... I can't miss out on this. I need to make some money so the baby will have a place to fucking live. I need to go. I swear I'll go to the next appointment. Okay?" He grabs Gerard's arm before he can make it to his bedroom.

 

Gerard looks Bert in the eyes and nods his head, "Sure, okay... Fine. It's alright. You can do whatever you want. It's not like you knew I was able to get pregnant. I'm not going to hold you responsible." He walked into his bedroom and pulled his shirt off.

 

"Hey," Bert said, glancing down at Gerard's belly, "You're showing a little."

 

"I know," he glanced at his full body mirror, "S'gross..."

 

"No, it's not." Bert walked over to Gerard and pet the little pouch. "It's nice."

 

Bert always found a way to make Gerard happy, even in a shitty situations.

 

"Promise me you won't stay out so late. I wanna' see you here when I get back." Gerard goes to his closet and pulls out a plain black shirt. "Don't smoke weed, either."

 

"Without you?" Bert grins and Gerard scoffs at him, "I'm not gonna' smoke, baby." he lays back on the bed and runs his hands over his stomach.

 

"Fine." Gerard says, going to the bathroom to fix his hair. 

***

Gerard's hopping into the passenger seat of his mother's car and he can't help, but feel a little angry when Bert comes outside with them to kiss him good bye. He wanted Bert to go. He didn't want to be there talking about the baby without him... He also didn't want to be there alone with his mom. He still felt the tension between them and Bert's presence always made him feel a bit more comfortable.

 

"Okay, Gerard..." The obstetrician smiles, "I talked with your doctor from the hospital and he's agreed to help me with your labor when the time comes." She's walking towards the table to her right. "I bet you've got a ton of questions such as how the baby is being delivered..." She pauses and turns to look back at Gerard.

 

"I, um... I do. Is it a C-section... That I'm getting?" He swallows the lump in the back of his throat.

 

"Well, we don't quite know... But if anything... If the baby feels it's going to come out we can't really keep it from not, y'know... Going through your rectum." She smiles weakly. "We're going to be assigning you a gynecologist..."

 

"Isn't that someone who specializes in... Female anatomy." Donna's brows furrow in confusion. "He doesn't have a vagina."

 

"We know, but this is to be safe." The doctor scribbles something down on a piece of paper. "We're gonna run some tests on you, Gerard, check and see if baby's growing..." Her tongue sticks out of her pink mouth. 

 

Gerard sits on the gurney uncomfortably and nods his head. 

 

"Okay, a few questions..." She starts. "Have you been sexually active during your first trimester?"

 

Gerard glares at his mom, "Uhm." He squeaks, adverting his eyes to the ground with guilt. 

 

"With the daddy, right?" She continues to scribble in her notepad.

 

"Yeah," he nods.

 

"That isn't a bad thing... But try to limit yourselves." She pauses to fiddle with a machine near by. "Okay, we're going to be checking the fetal heartbeat..." She's walking over to Gerard and instructs him to lay down. "Pull your shirt off."

 

"Oh, okay..." He subconsciously does what he's told. 

 

"You're the perfect size for the time..." She pauses, "Wanna' hear your baby's heart beat?" Her blue eyes look into his hazel ones. "It's very healthy."

 

"Sure, yeah." Gerard smiles. The doctor lets Gerard hear it and he coos out loud. 

 

"I can hear it!" He laughs. "Oh my god..."

 

"Wanna' hear it grandma?"

 

Donna stands up quickly and rushes over. She listens and tears immediately start leaking out of her eyes. "Don't cry, mom." Gerard grabs her hand.

 

"That's my grandbaby." She smiles, wiping her eyes.

 

They're leaving the office and Gerard feels better, slightly. He couldn't wait to tell Bert that their baby was healthy and growing and just fucking safe inside of him. 

 

When they get home Gerard hurry's out of the car and storms inside. "BERT?!" He calls out, looking around. 

 

"Bert's not here." Donald says, sitting at the couch with a book in his lap. "He called me to tell you he's gonna' get here late. Something about being on stage last. I don't know." He shrugs, going back to his reading.

 

"Fuck." Gerard scoffs, shaking his head. "I'm gonna' be up stairs." He starts to go up.

 

"Gerard, wait." Donna follows him.

 

"What?" He turns around when he gets to his room. "I'm really tired mom. I want to go to sleep."

 

"I know, but we need to talk about some things." 

 

They're taking a seat on the bed. "About what?" Gerard pulls the blankets over his shoulders. "If it's about Bert... I know he's gottah sleep down stairs."

 

"It's... It's not about that." She shakes her head and glances at Gerard's David bowie poster on his wall. "I just feel like he's... He's gonna' grow distant. Don't get mad at me. It's mother's intuition."

 

"Bert loves me. He isn't going to leave. He wants the baby, mom. He tells me every day and he... He cares." Gerard nods his head frantically. "It's bull shit that you'd say that."

 

"No, it's not bull shit, Gerard. It's just, I look at him and he's not bright like you. He wouldn't know what to do."

 

"Did dad know what to do?"

 

"He knew... He knew that he had to man up. He did everything he could to take care of us." She grabs Gerard's hand. "I'm just worried. He's probably good at other things, but kids..."

 

"How do you know I'll be any good?" Gerard asked her, fisting his free hand in his blankets.

 

"I just know you will."

 

They're quiet for a few seconds before the phone rings.

 

"I've got it." Donna reaches for it and answers, "Hello?"

 

"Hey, Mrs. Way. It's me... Bert!" He's shouting over the loud music in the background.

 

"Bert." She echoes, "Hey, Gerard's waiting for you... You gonna' be home soon?" She watches Gerard's face glow at the mention of the other boys name.

 

"Yeah, that's what I have to talk to him about. Can you put him on...?" The volume of the music goes down as he walks to a more isolated spot.

 

"Yeah, sweetheart, hold on." She passes it to Gerard. "We'll talk again later." She gets up to leave. "Night, baby." 

 

"G'night." Gerard tells her before she shuts his door, "Babe," he says eagerly as soon as he puts his ear to the phone.

 

"Baby, hey, I need to tell you something." Gerard can hear people talking in the background. "I'm gonna' be there by two in the morning... That's like, four hours from now. I know I said I'd be there when you got back, but we're on really late. I'm getting' a ride back with Dan. Stay up, okay? I wanna' talk about your appointment." He coughs.

 

"Four hours...?" the words go through his ears, "Fuck, Bert! No! You fucking said you were gonna' be here!" He shouts. "You never fucking pull through with your goddamn promises."

 

"C'mon, babe. It's not that long." He slurs and Gerard knows he's wasted. 

 

"How much did you drink? Who the fuck bought you drinks?" He snarls, clenching his jaw.

 

"The beard is the proper essential to have if you wanna' look over age." Bert laughs. "I got like, four beers in me. Some guys from the other bands just hand it out to me."

 

Gerard shakes his head in disbelief, "I can't believe you're drunk, man," he sighs.

 

"I love you, G..." Bert sang out randomly. "I LOVE YOUUU SO FUCKING MUCH!" 

 

"Stop. You're probably making a fool out of yourself." Gerard's lips curl up in a smile. "God, if you're drunk when you're here... I'm gonna' fuckin'..." He cuts himself off.

 

"You're gonna' what?" He can hear the grin in Bert's voice. "You gonna' suck my cock?" The words roll off his tongue.

 

"M'no..." Gerard laughs, shaking his head. "I'm not. I'm gonna' slap you and help you pull out the futon down stairs."

 

"Awe, shut-down." Bert cackled. "I'm gonna' fuck you hard tonight. Be prepared." 

 

"You...? You're gonna' fuck me... Me? Me as in Gerard?... Hm...?"

 

"Yeah, I'm gonna' fuck you, babe. I'm gonna' get you wet and smooth and I'm going to press my cock against your hole and just tease you." Bert whispered, his voice raspy and deep. "You'll like that, right?"

 

"I don't know." Gerard feels his cock stir in his pants. "What if I said I wasn't going to let you? What would you do?" He continues to play Bert's game.

 

"You just keep shuttin' me down, babe."

 

"I like being a tease. I push your buttons." Gerard lays on his back and spreads his thighs apart. "Wanna' know what I'm doin' right now?" He moves his hands in his pants.

 

"What?" Bert almost growls. 

 

"I'm touching my cock."

 

"Really now?"

 

"Mhm... It feels good..." He starts to let his hands move to his full balls, then down to the entrance where he curves his index finger inside.

 

"What're you doin' now?" Bert breathes, licking his lips.

 

"I'm fingering myself." Gerard grunts, "I hit my spot," he whimpers.

 

"No fuckin' way." Bert swallows the dry lump in his throat. "You pretending it's me inside of you?"

 

"Yuh-huh... Fuck... Fuck. Shit. Goddamn it." He moves his middle finger beside the one he already has inside himself.

 

"I'm in the bathroom... I'm gonna' jerk off real quick, don't come, babe..." Bert unzips his jeans and works his hard cock out of his jeans. "Keep moaning... I wanna' hear you."

 

Gerard bites down on his bottom lip and shuts his eyes closed. "I already came," he laughs, holding the phone in between his shoulder and ear. "I didn't even jerk off... God. I'm embarrassed," he pulls his jeans down and tosses them towards his hamper; he misses. 

 

"Fuck, seriously? Boner kill." Bert groans, stroking himself. "I was looking forward to listening," he manages to go flaccid in his hands.

 

"I'm sorry... I'll help you out when you get home. That cool?" Gerard walks himself to his bathroom to clean up.

 

"Yeah... S'cool. I gottah go, G. I'll see you later. Don't fall asleep. If I see you in bed I'm gonna' rape you." He jokes.

 

"Promise?" Gerard giggles, digging his hand through his hair.

 

"I promise, bye, babe." Bert hangs up.

 

Gerard tosses his phone onto his bed and looks into the mirror. He has his hand on his waist and his other hand working over the bump of his belly. He's having a pain shoot down his spine and it makes him a little queasy, but he doesn't puke.

 

"Food..." He murmurs to himself and pulls a pair of Bert's boxers on and an over sized Hell boy shirt on and hurry's down stairs to eat.

 

"Gerard." Donna says when she sees her son walk in through the kitchen door. "I'm making you something I use to eat when I was pregnant with you and Mikey... You're going to love it."

 

"What is it?" Gerard looks over her shoulder.

 

"You'll see..." She mashes two pieces of bread together and hands it to Gerard. "Take a bite."

 

"Jelly sandwich?" Gerard examines it.

 

"Just take a bite. You'll thank me."

 

Gerard looks at his mother then glares at the sandwich. "Okay..." He takes it.

 

Donna watches as he chews into the sandwich. "How is it?"

 

He keeps chewing until he swallows. "It's actually really good. What's in it?" He takes another bite.

 

"Well... Jelly sprinkled with salt and pickle juice... A dash of pepper and some turkey meat splashed with hot sauce." She tells him and Gerard gags a little. "I know, weird, but it fixes all your cravings. It's got a little bit of sweet, salty, spicy, tangy, zesty, and sour."

 

"Joy. Everything I could ask for." Gerard laughs. "S'really good, mom. Thanks," he smiles.

 

"You're very welcome, baby... Now if you'll excuse me. I'm gonna' bring Mikey his cookies and milk." She leaves the kitchen with the tray and Gerard goes to the fridge for a bottle of chocolate milk.

 

He thinks maybe he's going to sleep when he finishes eating because there's no way he's going to stay up, for four hours, by himself doing nothing, just waiting for Bert to get home.


	13. Black Hair Dye

Gerard's eyes blink open when he hears a car drive up the drive-way, he can also hear loud, metal music and when the volume goes down the car light dims and the sound of the door of whoever car it is flies open, "Thanks, dude! I'll see you tomorrow. Rock on!" Bert rasps, his voice echoing outside.

 

Gerard sits up quickly and pushes his bangs behind his ears. 

 

"Tell the wife I said what's up." Dan's voice.

 

"Will do..." 

 

Dan's car drives off and Bert's walking to the front door.

 

Gerard glances at his alarm clock: 4:36a.m

 

"Fuck, ungh..." He hears Bert walking up the stair case.

 

Gerard's eye brows stitch together in anger. Bert said he was gonna' be home at two. Not fucking four in the goddamn morning. He had a shit load of explaining to do.

 

"Babe..." He's turning the door knob and when he opens it he's stumbling inside.

 

"Bert, the fuck?" Gerard pushes his blankets aside. "I swear to god, I'm so fucking pissed right now!" He shouts.

 

"W-what...? What, why?" Bert runs his fingers through his greasy blond hair. "I mean, shit, babe... I was meant to call you, but you... I had to get on stage. The crowd loved it. We're in, man... We." He pauses and grabs his head. "The rooms spinnin' real fuckin' fast."

 

"Sit down... Just, fucking hurry before you puke all over the place." Gerard stands up and grabs his boyfriends arm. "What'd you drink...? And what the fuck did you smoke?" He sniffs Bert's clothes.

 

"I drank a shit ton, man... Smoked a bunch of weed... Ciggs... Ate some nachos." He burps. "Were you asleep?"

 

"Of course I was a-fucking-sleep, Bert. I wasn't going to wait for you to get here!" He hisses, shaking his head, "I hope you have the worse hang over tomorrow. I swear."

 

Bert's laying on his back on Gerard's bed and watches as the younger boy goes to his bathroom and pulls out a bucket. "Puke in this if you have to." 

 

"Aren't I... Suppose to not be up here?" Bert sits up and grabs the bucket; he holds it close to his chest and squeezes his eyes shut. "Your mom's gonna' fuckin' kill me, baby."

 

"I'll explain to her what happened. She'll understand." Gerard's crawling in bed next to Bert. "I'm still really mad at you. You told me you were going to be here at two... You lied."

 

"I didn't lie, man." Bert rolls his eyes and lays his arm over Gerard's shoulder. "I lost track of time. After the gig everyone wanted my autograph and shit... Damn, it felt good."

 

"That's no excuse, you dick. You aren't suppose to blow me off."

 

"Really? I haven't even gotten the chance to yet." He lets his hand move to the front of Gerard's sweat pants.

 

"I didn't mean that," he pushes Bert's hand away. "I want you to be responsible, because when we have this baby you're going to have to man up and take care of us."

 

"It's all on me, huh? Greattt..." He draws out. "I can't wait."

 

Gerard sighs and shakes his head, "I love you."

 

"Love you."

 

The two boys fall asleep and when morning comes Bert's looking over to the buzzing alarm clock; six thirty am. He only had two hours of sleep.

 

"Shit, fuck me." Bert groans. He was still a little drunk.

 

"Babe... Turn it off." Gerard cuddles up to his chest, "S'loud."

 

"Well, damn." Bert moves from under Gerard and stands up on shaky legs. "We gottah go to school."

 

"I know." Gerard puffs, "It's just... I have a head ache."

 

"You have a head ache?" Bert rasps, "I'm still wasted." He grabs the half full bucket of vomit and went to the bathroom with it. "Your mom's gonna' fuckin' kill my ass." He says when he's done brushing his teeth.

 

"M'no she won't..."

 

"Says you." Bert comes back and he's shirtless. "I have this urge to dye my hair black... Like let it grow out and shit."

 

"Like mine?" Gerard runs his fingers through his long, dark hair.

 

"Longer, like, collar bones and shit. How'd you think I'll look?" Bert stands in the middle of the room; his hands on his hips. "Think I'll look pretty, like you?"

 

"Mhm..." Gerard laughs. "You'll look like Kurt Cobain if you grow it out and have it blond."

 

"You'd like that, wouldn't you? You're in love with that self-loathing fuck." Bert goes to his suitcase and pulls out a pair of camouflaged cargo pants and a plain green T-shirt. "You'll probably pretend it's him fucking you when we have sex."

 

"Bert." Gerard scoffs. "It's just... I don't know. I think you'd look like him s'all..."

 

"I know... But I'm not gonna' leave it blond. Blond's a fuckin' crappy color for hair. I want it like, pitch black and sleek and sexy and long." Bert motions with his hands when he's done dressing. "I seriously wanna' go get hair dye after school. You'll come with me, right?"

 

"Babe, I'll dye it for you. S'gonna' be easy. Your hair's really short." 

 

"The buzz cut's growin' out though. I can twirl it..." He runs his fingers through his messy hair. "Do I look hot?" He strikes a pose.

 

"Totally..." Gerard climbs out of bed and goes to his walk-in closet to get dressed.

 

Bert's leaving the bedroom to go serve them some cereal and when Gerard's done sliding into his black skinny jeans and over sized black T-shirt which he has to wear to hide his belly, he finally goes to the bathroom to brush his teeth and comb his hair and put on some eye liner.

 

"You done, babe!?" Bert shouts, walking into the room, "Well... Look at you." He leans against the door. "Don't you look like a sexy mofo."

 

"I'm only wearing a pair of jeans and a dirty old T-shirt." Gerard fluffs his hair and goes to his backpack and pulls out a chap stick. "You look good, though... Cute actually, like a little kid."

 

"Do I now?" Bert goes behind Gerard and grinds his hips against his ass. "Do little kids get raging hard-on's against their boyfriend's ass?"

 

"Depends in which type of house hold you were raised in." Gerard stands up straight. "I know I'd do that if I were a kid."

 

"You're so damn funny, babe." Bert goes to grab his back pack. "C'mon, I served you some cookie crisps. It's gonna' get mushy if you take too long." He's walking down the stairs.

 

Gerard's trudging down the steps and when he walks into the kitchen he sees his parent's and little brother sitting at the table, eating toast and eggs. "G'mornin' guys." Gerard shakes his hand into his hair nervously.

 

"Hey, G." Mikey smiles. 

 

"Hey." Gerard goes to his little brother and touches his skinny shoulder. "You had a good sleep, Mike's?"

 

"Yeah, it felt really short though! I opened my eyes and it was morning!" He bounces and Donna laughs.

 

"Yeah, same here..." Bert groans, fixing the coffee machine. "I can't get it to work."

 

"You've gottah press the green button, babe." Gerard rubs his face. "It's not rocket science."

 

"I heard you two shouting at four in the morning. What happened?" Donna asks whilst looking between the two teenage boy's. "Argument?"

 

"Uh, no..." Gerard says, shaking his head. "It's nothing."

 

"I remember telling you two to not sleep together. I woke up and went downstairs and didn't see Bert on the futon. Care to explain why?"

 

"Mom, please... Not right now. I'll tell you later. I really just want to crawl into bed and fuckin' die. I've got this head ache that feels like someone's beating the inside of my head with a sledge hammer." Gerard grabx his bowl of cereal and begins to eat.

 

"Mormon's drink coffee now?" Donald watches Bert take a drink of the caffeine.

 

"Oh, um... Sorry?" Bert sets it down on the counter. 

 

"Bert's not a Mormon, dad." Gerard said, "He doesn't believe in God."

 

"G... I told you not to tell anyone." Bert murmurs, grabbing his cup again.

 

"You don't?" Mikey pipes up.

 

"Um... No. I don't."

 

The room goes quiet. "I'll see you guys later." Bert slips his back pack on and leaves the kitchen.

 

Gerard's setting his bowl on the counter and rushes out to follow Bert. "Babe! What the fuck?!" Gerard hurry's outside after him. "Why the hell are you power walking?!"

 

"Thanks for fucking humiliating me in front of your goddamn parents, G!" Bert stops walking and turns around to glare at his boyfriend. "D'you see the way they looked at me?!"

 

"Babe, what the hell are you talking about?! They don't believe in God either!" Gerard laughs loudly. "They were only like that because they didn't think you'd quit being a Mormon! You use to love God and shit like that!"

 

"Use TO!" Bert screams. "I fucking hate it when you blabber about everything." He starts walking when Gerard catches up to him. "Fuck, man..." Bert leans over and pukes on the side walk. 

 

"Awe, God..." Gerard run his hands through his hair. "D'you wanna' go back home?"

 

"No, I'm not missin' school..." He shakes his head.

 

"Fine." Gerard presses his hand against Bert's back and starts to rub. "I'm sorry I blurted out your personal business... And I'm sorry you have a fucked up head ache."

 

Bert stands up and shakes his head. "It's what ever... It doesn't matter now." He wipes his mouth and spit down at the ground. "I didn't mean to scream at you."

 

"I know..." 

 

The two boys walk hand and hand towards the school building and when they walk inside Bert leans against his locker and watches as Gerard opens his. "I think..." Bert starts, watching as Gerard bit his lip and flips his hair back away from his face. "I think I wanna' marry you."

 

"Shut up." Gerard giggles, "You're drunk."

 

"No, I'm serious... I love you so much."

 

"That doesn't mean that we should get married. I love you too though, but y'know that's not enough." Gerard shakes his head.

 

"Love birds!" Jepha chirps, approaching the two boys, disrupting their conversation. "I'm fuckin' high as a kite!" He flaps his arms like a bird.

 

"Dude, I'm still wasted." Bert high-fives his friend. "It's crazy, man... How're Quinn and Dan? How're they doin'? They holding up alright?"

 

"Dude, Dan's in the parking-lot puking his lungs out and Quinn's in the car, getting dressed." Jepha tells them.

 

"You guys are fucking crazy." Gerard pulls his books out his locker and shuts it closed. "I mean, you get wasted all night and morning when you have to go to school. The teachers are gonna' notice how wasted you all are."

 

Jepha and Bert glare at him before they laugh, "Babe, c'mon... We're seniors. Like they don't already know what we do!" Bert howls, pulling Gerard into a kiss. "The bell's gonna' ring soon. I'll see you at lunch." They part and Gerard watches the two boys stumble away.

*

School's coming to an end and when Gerard finds Bert he's standing by the front gate, smoking a cigarette, talking to a couple guys from the foot ball team.

 

Gerard dreads having to encounter them, all they do is pucker their lips at him and wolf whistle, but Bert tells them to stop and they do... Only for a little bit.

 

"Babe..." Gerard grabs his boyfriends hand.

 

"Well, look at who we have here!" Craig, the quarter back of the team looks Gerard up and down. "Why haven't you sucked my cock again? I miss your lips around my dick." He teases and the other jocks laugh.

 

"Dude, seriously... That's my fucking boyfriend. Stop talkin' shit." Bert tosses his cigarette and pulls Gerard close to his chest. "What's up, baby, had a good day?" Bert kisses his cheek.

 

The guys from the team leave, but they wink at Gerard and walk backwards as they grab their packages and mouth, suck my dick, in Gerard's direction.

 

"Those guys are assholes. Why do you hang out with them?" Gerard sneers at them.

 

"Well, I've known most of those assholes since grade school, G. They're my friends. I know all their parent's and shit." Bert tells him as they start leaving the school campus.

 

"Still..." Gerard murmurs, shaking his head in disgust.

 

"We gonna' go get the hair dye, right?" Bert turns left, opposite from where Gerard lives.

 

"Yeah," he nods, following close next to Bert, their fingers intertwined.


	14. Our Frank

Bert and Gerard walk into the store, their hands still laced together. They go straight for the hair product isle and start skimming the boxes of hair dye on display. 

 

"This one's good... I usually go for the one next to it though." Gerard points. "Too bad I can't dye my hair... My roots are coming out like, really shitty brown," he sighed.

 

"Yeah, hmm..." Bert grabs the dye and examines the cover. "It's so black that it's almost blue... I like this one," he reaches for a more natural black. "This one's good. I'll get it."

 

They start going to the cash register when Bert hears his name being called he turns to look, "Frank! My homie!" He screeches and waves, "Dude, long time no see! You work here now?"

 

"Hey, man..." It's the Frank guy that Gerard had met the last time he was at the store with his mother a few weeks ago. "I know... I haven't seen you for like a full year! I work here now, yeah, and I got my own place." He nods; his smile out rageously stretched out.

 

"Dude, sweet! I live with my boyfriend now and his parent's. You still goin' out with Stacey?" Bert grabs a hold of Gerard's hand.

 

"Dude, boyfriend!? He's your boyfriend," he points at Gerard, "I already met him the last time he was here. And nah, dude. Stace and I broke up. He and I didn't see things straight. Dude, I didn't know you were gay!" Frank laughs, punching Bert's arm. "S'crazy. Your parent's probably pray up the ass! Welcome to the other side of the team."

 

Bert laughs and shakes his head, "Yeah, they pray for my lost soul... Sucks you and Stacey broke up. You guys were a cute couple."

 

Gerard stands there awkwardly and itches the back of his neck. "I'll take you guys to my register!" Frank notices Gerard's posture and brings the boys over to his work station.

 

"Which one of you's is gonna' dye your hair...?" He asks the question and it's directed towards Gerard.

 

"Oh, Bert... He's gonna', um. Do it," he nods, pursing his lips.

 

"Woah, Bert. Blond is out, eh?" Frank smirks.

 

"Blond is boring, dude. I've had this lame ass color for like, all my life and I want somethin' different." He shrugs, "Plus, I'm gonna' let my hair grow out. Don't wanna' keep it blond... I might start to look like Kurt Cobain."

 

"I see... Well... That's not a bad thing..." He scans the little box, "That'll be eight sixty two."

 

Bert pulls his wallet from his back pocket and pulls out a ten dollar bill.

 

"Have fun with the dye, dude." Frank passes Bert his change back.

 

"Hey," Bert says, before he and Gerard walk off, "What time are you off of work?"

 

Frank looks thoughtful for a moment before he fishes his cell phone from his back pocket and glares at the screen, "In ten minutes. I'll be clocking out soon... Why?"

 

"Come with us. I mean, to chill and stuff. G's gonna' be dyin' my hair and we can play video games. Like the good ol' days, Frankie." Bert smirks.

 

"Sure, sounds fun... Just meet me in the front in five minutes." Frank starts to scan the next group of items in line.

 

Gerard and Bert sit out front for a few moments. Bert starts smoking a cigarette and Gerard keeps his distance; he felt like every little thing would hurt the baby.

 

"I'm finished, babe." Bert tosses his cigarette and stomps on it.

 

Frank's starting to walk out the store, clutching onto his coat, with a shopping bag in his hands. "I grabbed a couple snacks," he says, smiling at the two boys. 

 

"Awesome." Bert reaches out for Gerard's hand, "Let's go."

 

They're gathering out of Frank's car and over to Gerard's front door, which is unlocked. "Mom! Dad! Bert and I are home!" He screeches, pulling his coat off and hung it on the rack near by.

 

"We're in the kitchen!" Donald yells back.

 

"Go up stairs guys..." Gerard tells the two boys and they do what they're told. "I'll meet you up."

 

Gerard walks into the kitchen and goes to the fridge to pull out three cans of soda.

 

"Had a good day at school, bud?" Donald asks his oldest son while turning off the stove when he finished frying steaks.

 

"Uh-huh. We went to the store to get some hair dye. Bert wants his hair black now." Gerard says, smiling as he holds the soda cans in his arms.

 

"Black? Oh dear God..." Donna laughs, shaking her head. "You boys got a friend with you? I heard extra talking when you boys walked in."

 

"Yeah, you know that cashier at the Food Mart. The guy named Frank? He's a friend of Bert's," Gerard explains, going to the kitchen door.

 

"Who isn't friends with Bert, the boy knows everyone." Donna rolls her eyes and Gerard shrugs his shoulders.

 

"We'll be up stairs if you need anything," he leaves to go to his bedroom.

 

*

 

"It's going in really good," Frank munches on a chip as he examines Bert's hair. "Super dope."

 

"Is it?" Bert turns to look at himself in the mirror. "Shit, fucking awesome!"

 

"Sit still... I still have to get your bangs, man." Gerard's slightly annoyed. The smell of the ammonia was giving him a headache and his stomach hurts really bad. "I wanna' get this over with."

 

When Bert goes to the shower to wash his hair out Frank and Gerard stay in the bedroom, sitting in front of the television, playing video games... Well, Frank played video games. Gerard just watches.

 

"So," Frank starts, leaning forward into the screen, "how long have you and Bert been dating?"

 

Gerard chews down on his bottom lip for a moment before reply's, "A couple years..." He murmurs and Frank's brow goes straight to his hairline.

 

"A couple years?"

 

"Two years and a month."

 

"Oh..."

 

"Yeah."

 

"I've never seen you around before... Do you go out often?" Frank continues to ask.

 

Gerard lets out a deep sigh and shakes his slowly. "I... I usually had to look out for my little brother because my parent's worked the same hourly shift, but now that my dad has a new job and makes his own schedule I don't have to watch him as much," he explains and Frank hums loudly in response.

 

"You look really uncomfortable." Frank points out and Gerard wraps his arms around himself self-consciously.

 

"Oh, erm... Sorry?"

 

"No, I'm sorry if I'm making you feel that way... Want me to stop talking?" Frank pauses the game and turns himself around so that he's completely facing Gerard.

 

"No... Wouldn't it be even more awkward if we just sat here in silence?"

 

Frank smirks and nods his head, "That's true..."

 

"I WAN'T TO FUCK YOU EVERY MINUTE EVERY HOUR EVERYDAYYY!" They hear Bert sings, morphing the lyrics to The Darkness: I believe in a thing called love, and Gerard face palms.

 

"S'not quite how the lyrics go," Frank laughs.

 

"He likes to sing it like that," Gerard tells him and presses his hand against his belly. "Funny though."

 

"Have you guys fucked yet?" Frank asks and Gerard flushes a hot pink. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to."

 

"... Um, I lost my... Virginity to Bert a few months... Ago." Gerard stammers and Frank blinks at him.

 

"I sort of thought you'd be the type to wait until you'd meet someone special... Is Bert your first boyfriend?" Frank continues to ask and if Gerard's face turns anymore pinker he'll be a fucking valentines card.

 

"He's not my first... I've had a few. But they only lasted a few months." Gerard's starting to get a bit annoyed so he shoots out a question before Frank can ask him another one. "Do you usually harass your friends boyfriends or is it your mission to try and get me to suck your dick?" He couldn't hold it in any longer and when Frank's brows rise his mouth kind of opens and closes like a fish out of water.

 

"I'm not... Dude, it's not like that. I... I don't want you to suck my dick. Why so snappy? I'm sorry if I offended you, but I asked if you wanted me to be quiet and you said it was less awkward if we talked. I just want to get to know you." Frank says, a little hurt by Gerard's rude question.

 

Gerard sits there, bringing his knees to his chest while Frank goes back to playing video games.

 

*

 

"Your friend, Frank, he's fucking weird." Gerard tells Bert, helping his boyfriend pull out the futon.

 

"Weird how?"

 

"He was just asking me about... About us and it got awkward. Like, I don't know..." Gerard beats around the bush and Bert just yawns.

 

"He's just a talker is all... When I first met him we were so fucking drunk, babe... Like, his boyfriend of like two weeks gave me a hand job, but I didn't know he was dating Frank... So we got into this fight, but when I explained myself he broke up with the dude and we became good friends because of that, ha... So fucking awesome..."

 

The only words Gerard manage to hear is... "Hand job?!" He shrieks.

 

"Awe, c'mon! S'only a hand job! Don't tell me you've never gotten a hand job? Or at least given one..." He's waiting for Gerard's expression to change, but it never does. "Dude. Now I feel like a dick."

 

"You seem to like letting people touch your dick." Gerard spat, throwing spare pillows at Bert. "Fuck you,"

 

"Not even a big deal, dude. Get over it G. We weren't even dating so it--"

 

"So it doesn't matter? Yes it fucking does! Don't rub shit like that in my face. If I had sucked some guys cock I would never admit to it when I'm dating you!" Gerard cringes when Bert scoffs at him. "What?!"

 

"That's totally fucked up. So you're saying if we don't last you're going to pretend we didn't lose our virginity to each other when you start dating another guy? Then maybe you weren't a virgin when we had sex... Then maybe you have sucked off other dudes." Bert concludes and Gerard's jaw clenches and his nostrils flair.

 

"I didn't say that. I didn't mean it like that. I meant that I wouldn't admit to it because I would never bring it up."

 

"I'm gonna' ask you a question then, since you brought it up." Bert sits on the futon and pats it so Gerard can join him. He sits. "Have you had sexual relationships with other guys?"

 

Gerard bites down on his bottom lip and closes his eyes. "I... I don't want to talk about it..."

 

"Babe, listen. I'm asking because you got mad at me for being honest. I'm not going to be mad at you. Shit, you're way too fucking hot for someone to not have fucked or sucked you or whatever," he cackles and Gerard sniffs and rubs his hands on his bare thighs. "What's wrong?"

 

"It was... I was fourteen. We were fourteen... And um--" Gerard scrunches his face a bit and shakes his hair away from his eyes. "It was pretty bad."

 

"Who was he?"

 

"Um... I. I can't really say..."

 

"Tell me, G."

 

"Craig," Gerard spits out, squeezing his pale thighs. Bert's shocked. Too shocked to say anything. 

 

"We were in his room... His mom and my mom were down stairs and they were talking, baking cakes for a get-together all the parents and teachers were going to have at the school and... And Craig was so cute. I liked how blue his eyes were and how blond his hair was. He was so boyish... So not me," Gerard pokes himself in the chest and continues. "He kept saying that I should wear his sisters clothes so that way we could pretend to be husband and wife... and when I put her, um, her cheerleader uniform Craig walked behind me and he grabbed my hair and tied them into pigtails with the matching hair ties and when I turned around to look at him he had his hand in his pants..."

 

Bert's leg twitches slightly when Gerard puts his hand on his knee.

 

"He told me that... That since he knew I liked him he'd let me touch him. We went too far. I pulled his... His cock out of boxers and sucked him off... It was awkward, he kept pulling my hair... And he called me... Called me Crystal--his girlfriends name at the time--I felt disgusting, used, pathetic... Every time he walks past me in the halls he grabs his crotch and asks me if I want to suck his dick 'again'." Gerard adverts his eyes to the futon he and Bert   
were sitting on.

 

"Fuck..." Bert whispers, resting his hand on Gerard's thigh. "Babe, you should have told me. I would have stopped being friends with that fuck a long time ago..."

 

"I didn't... I didn't want anyone to know that I did that with him."

 

"Totally understandable... Geeze... Now I feel really shitty telling you about that hand job. You went as far as sucking Craig's dick."

 

"I almost let him fuck me." Gerard blurts out and Bert chokes on his breath. "He kept asking me if I wanted to 'ride his huge dick' and I kept nodding like a whore... Moaning around his dick, pretending like I knew what I was doing. I liked him a lot, Bert. He rolled up the skirt I was wearing and kept touching and slapping my butt... He almost pushed his fingers inside me."

 

"Why didn't he get to fuck you?"

 

"His mom knocked on the door," Gerard laughs for the first time from telling his story. "I had to run into his bathroom and change my clothes. I think she knew what we were doing because she asked me to come help them cook downstairs with the cooking while Craig watched football with his dad."

 

Bert nods. "She totally knew. She was trying to make you a house-wife," he jokes and Gerard rolls his eyes and stands up.

 

"Enjoy being the husband whose gottah sleep in the living room because he didn't do what the wife said to do." Gerard rubs Bert's hair before pecking him on the lips. "Goodnight. I love you."

 

"M'love you too."


	15. Hormones

Gerard's in bed with his blankets wrapped tightly around his body. He hasn't been able to fall asleep... He was beyond cold and he knows the AC has been tampered with. 

 

Bert. 

 

He knows it was Bert because the older boy whines constantly about how hot the house is and it's never even hot. The air's always on 70 degrees, but Bert's just use to 65.

 

Gerard knew why the McCracken house was always kept on 65... It was because they were ice people. They had no emotion, besides anger, and if the house were to be over 60 they would melt. Yes, Gerard believed his hypothesis was fact.

 

Gerard can't stand how freezing it is, so he rolls out of bed at four in the morning and marches down stairs, his blankets tied wrapped around his shoulders like a cape.

 

"Bert," he calls out and when he turns into the living room he hears the television on and Bert laughing under his breath. "Bert, what the fuck?"

 

Bert snaps his head in Gerard's direction and stares at him with giant saucer eyes. "Yo, baby. Whatcha doin' up?"

 

Gerard looks around the area to make sure no one else was around. "I should be asking you that... Who the hell is here?"

 

"Er, no one..." Bert lays his hand down on the lump of his blanket.

 

"Pull the blanket back, Bert. I'm not fucking kidding. I heard you talking."

 

"G, don't get mad..."

 

"Just fucking do it."

 

Bert sighs loudly and pulls the covers back, revealing Quinn. "His parent's kicked him out because he was smoking weed. Y'know how they're all Mormon and shit, so he'll most likely not be allowed back inside."

 

Quinn waves slightly and sits up on the futon; his hands in his lap like an obedient child.

 

Gerard stood there; his jaw clenched and his hips jutted forward like a pissed off mother "Bert, my parent's already have to take you in... Doesn't Quinn have anywhere else to stay?"

 

"Yeah, he does, but Dan's asleep and Quinn texted him like, thirty times, but the dude's a heavy sleeper." Bert explains.

 

"Word," Quinn nods and Gerard rolls his eyes as he turns up the air.

 

"Just please... Please don't turn the air down to 60 again. The light bill will fucking sky rocket and my parent's are gonna' flip." Gerard warns them and they both nod their heads like bobble toys.

 

Gerard stood their for another few seconds and he sees Quinn lay down and Bert joins him. "Baby... Why don't you sleep with me tonight? My mom'll understand when she sees Quinn down here. I want you to warm me up."

 

Bert looks to him and then to Quinn. "You okay out here by yourself, dude?"

 

Gerard sighs at this and starts to walk up the stairs.

 

"Yeah, I'm good... Go get some ass for me, will ya?" Gerard hears Quinn say.

 

"Sure will... If Donna asks you why you're here just tell her what happened," Bert says as he gathers his stuff. "G'night, Quinny." He pecks his best friend on the cheek before he starts to head over to Gerard.

 

They're in the bedroom when Gerard turns on the lights and pulls Bert against him. "My stomach's starting to get bigger... After dinner it was bulging and I thought the bulge would go away but it's still there, feel...." He takes Bert's hand it puts it under his shirt.

 

"M'ah..." Bert hums, rubbing up and down the small, swollen bump. "Yeah, getting bigger already. When are you going into your second trimester?"

 

"At the end of this week..."

 

"Shit, so you're... Twelve weeks?" Bert coos, continuing to rub his hands up and down Gerard's belly.

 

"Someone's been doing their research on pregnancy," Gerard giggles, going to the bed and laying down slowly.

 

"Yeah, actually, I have... I'm totally into this baby process thing." Bert lies next to his boyfriend and kisses his cheek.

 

"I get to find out the gender soon... Like, my next appointment. Exciting, right?"

 

Bert nods quickly and rests his hand on Gerard's belly. "What do you want?" He asks and Gerard shrugs. "You don't care?"

 

"Not really... It's not like we planned for this to happen so what ever we get is okay with me. I just want it to be healthy and shit..." Gerard explains and Bert hums quietly.

 

"A girl would be nice..." Bert decides, under his breath.

 

"It doesn't matter, but we'll see." Gerard tells him and the older boy nods. "I love your hair like this..." He changes the subject and cuddles into Bert's shoulder, running his fingers through Bert's clean, dark locks.

 

"I look so fucking different."

 

"Your parents would each have heart attacks..." Gerard yawns into Bert's freshly dyed locks.

 

"... Yeah... They would. Lets only hope."

*

Gerard's in the kitchen with his mother and when they set the plates at the dining table Bert walks in; his cellphone to his ear and Quinn following close behind him.

 

"Dude... No! No fucking way! Really?!" He shouts and Quinn's bouncing up and down. "You're totally fucking kidding me, right?"

 

Gerard and Donna glance at each other in confusion.

 

"What's going on?" Gerard asks, going to turn off the stove.

 

Bert raises his hand in the air and looks down intently as he listens to whoever it was he was speaking to on the phone. Gerard was getting annoyed with the phone calls and being ignored because of it. He didn't like it one bit.

 

"That's perfect! Hell yeah I'll do it, man. Fuck yeah... Um, let me write the number down..." He looks around the kitchen and then snaps his fingers at Gerard, hastily. "Pen, baby, I need a pen."

 

Gerard rushes away from the stove and goes to pull a pen from the drawer near by. "Here," he hands it to his boyfriend.

 

"Aight, six... Seven, twenty two..." he trails off. "Got it, thanks a ton dude... Yeah, see ya at school tomorrow. Peace." He hangs up and punches the air in excitement. "Got a job interview at the pizza joint tomorrow at five."

 

"Five." Gerard repeats. "My fucking appointment's at four thirty."

 

Bert glares at his boyfriend for a long moment and then shrugs his shoulders. "You're gonna' have a lot more appointments, right? I'll make it to the next one. I need this job so I can support you and the baby... You'll thank me," Bert leaves through the kitchen door and Quinn follows.

 

"Fucking dick." Gerard mutters under his breath and Donna continues to fix up around the kitchen; in her head she's saying 'I told you so'.

 

*

 

After dinner Gerard's running up the stairs, bringing himself into the bathroom and falling down on his knees in front of the toilet. He starts puking up his food and when he's wrenching he feels a warm hand on his back and it's not who he would like it to be. 

 

"Dude, being preggers sucks," Quinn laughs, rubbing small circles on the dark haired boys back.

 

"Q-Quinn, where's Bert?" Gerard manages to wheeze out after he's done vomiting.

 

"In your room... He's going over a few lyrics. He told me to come check up on you."

 

"Oh, great..." Gerard gags, sticking his head back into the toilet.

 

"Let me help you up." Quinn volunteers and grabs the shorter boy by his wrists and yanked him up delicately and when he's standing he kind of hits his head against Quinn's chest and falls forward, like all his weight is on the tall blonde. He doesn't seem to care or think much of it.

 

"M'sorry..." Gerard pulls away, weakly, and looks up at Bert's friend with saucer eyes.

 

"N-no... It's cool. You're fine."

 

"What?"

 

"I said no problem."

 

Quinn lets his hand touch Gerard's shoulder and rubs him there. "I gottah go."

 

Gerard rushes out the bathroom and to his bedroom and when he gets in his slams the door shut behind him and then locks it. "Fuck you, you fucking asshole!" Gerard picks up his Vegas snow globe from his desk and throws it at his boyfriend who now looks startled and less concentrated. "Next time you here me fucking puking my guts out don't fucking send your friends to check up on me!"

 

Bert moves his hands over his face and exclaims for Gerard to 'back the fuck away'. "Dude, you need to fuckin' chill the fuck out!"

 

"NO!" Gerard reaches for his beloved Darth Vader action figure and yanks it off it's perch and throws it directly at Bert, catching him against his eye.

 

"DUDE!" Bert pushes himself on his knees and grabs the younger boy by his arm and yanks him on the bed. "Watch where you throw shit!"

 

"GET OFF ME!" Gerard shrieks out and manages to push his fist out against Bert's jaw. "I FUCKING HATE YOU RIGHT NOW!"

 

Bert does what he's told and the younger boy lays there, covering his face with his hands as he starts crying. "Jesus... Your hormones are out of this world," Bert sighs, pressing his fingers against the bruise forming against his eye.

 

...'knock, knock, knock'...

 

"Yo, guys... Can I come in?" Quinn turns the door knob but it's locked.

 

"Coming, man..." Bert looks down at Gerard and then hops off the bed and lets his friend into the room. "We'll just go down stairs... Gottah leave him alone for a few. He's pretty pissed."

 

"Yeah, okay... Cool."

 

Their voices fade when the door is shut and as soon as they're gone Gerard sits up and wipes his face with the sleeve of his shirt and looks around, sniffling to himself.

 

His eyes come across Bert's lyric note book and when he reaches for it he examines the sketches on the cover, more like doodles... Of random shit too. Like weed plants, guns, pills, and in the middle of said drawings 'The Used' is bold and abrupt. Almost like the boys in the band.

 

Gerard decides to flip open the notebook he reads the first few sentences that catch his eye.

Sound effects and over dramatics:  
When the shirt came off, it was all in time. When a m-m-m-minute turned into a mile. And then I broke that grin, and I cut it out. And you got all turned on by the taste of your sin. When I mentioned blue, all you thought was colour. When you mentioned drugs, all I thought was sober. When your pants came off and I turned you over. When you mentioned blue. Kill. Smile. Cut it out for me this time. Smile, haven't seen him smile in a while.

 

He finishes, but there's more, a lot more to what he sees but that's enough. That's enough for him to want to go downstairs and scream and throw some more inanimate objects in Bert's direction.

 

He clutches the notebook in his hands and stands up on his bed and jumps over to his front door. He's marching down the steps and when he comes into the living room Bert's on the couch with Quinn and they're playing video games and eating chips.

 

"Son of a bitch." He stands in front of the television screen which results in shouting teenage boys urging for Gerard to move out of the way.

 

"Dude, we're about to beat that level! MOVE!" Bert shouts, pausing the game on time before anything happened. "What the fuck's your problem--?" His eyes move on the notebook in Gerard's hands. "What are you doing with my lyrics?"

 

He clears his throats before he begins to read, "Run quick switch sides. Spill the filled up canister. And the room is shaking. Now you're changing places. And I switched my pace. And my breathing races when you mention blue..." He finishes, shutting the book closed and glares down at Bert.

 

"... I was gonna' read it to you when it was finished."

 

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean, huh?" He throws the book at Bert. "Quinn, tell me... Has Bert talked about how it was like fucking me to you and the other guys?" Gerard crosses his arms over his chest.

 

"I... Uh, no. He hasn't," he looks in Bert's direction.

 

"Don't fucking lie to me, man!" Gerard shrieks and the boys advert their eyes to the ground. "Alright... I see how it is... Give me back the fucking book." He attempts to snatch it from Bert's lap.

 

"NO!" Bert screams and pushes Gerard's arm away. "Why are you so goddamn crazy today? You're goin' psycho-ass on me!"

 

"GIVE ME IT!"

 

Donna's running down the stairs in her robe. "What's all this noise going on down here?!"

 

"Nothin'." Quinn and Bert both say in unison.

 

"Bert's writing nasty shit about me in his songs, mom." Gerard says in a tattle-tale tone.

 

"What?" Donna's face distorts in confusion.

 

"Am not!"

 

Gerard's lips tighten and he looks down at Bert with intimidating eyes before he goes back up stairs to lock himself in his bedroom.


	16. Gender

Two months passed by and Gerard's larger. He's four months. Four whole months and that meant he can find out the sex of his child. Funny thing about that... Bert won't be attending the appointment with him. Again. He's deciding to just not count his blessings. Bert says he's busy so Gerard decided to leave it at that.

 

He's too busy for Gerard and their unborn child.

 

His mom was there with him, obviously, and his father eventually. They had Mikey come too, to find out the sex of their new addition.

 

Gerard was nervous; his heart was beating extremely fast and his palms were sweaty. His mother held his hand through out the whole process and he was so thankful to have his family supporting him... Even when Bert wasn't there he was still happy.

 

"Hello, Gerard... I'm Rachel, your assigned sonographer. Today's the big day. Are you excited?" his sonographer asked and Gerard nodded his head quickly. "What are you hoping for?" She started to set up the equipment. 

 

"I... I don't know, but my boyfriend wants a girl. Either's fine with me.I just want him or her to be healthy. That's all that really matters." Gerard tightened his grip on his mothers hand. She squeezed back to reassure him.

 

"Yeah, a healthy child is the over all main objective. When I was pregnant with my son I just hoped I didn't have any malfunctions. I can totally relate." She fixed the wand and smeared the cold gel on Gerard's pelvis.

 

Gerard flinched and the woman giggled. "A bit cold..." she said.

 

"Yeah," he chuckled nervously and shut his eyes closed.

 

"Alrighty..." she glared at the screen and went over the bump of Gerard's belly. "Well... Now... Do you see that...?" she pointed and Gerard opened his eyes quickly.

 

"Oh my..." Donna gasped.

 

"what is it. I can't tell..." Gerard shrieked and squeezed his mother's hand even tighter.

 

"Do you see that, sweetie?" She pointed to a round line and Gerard's mouth fell open slightly.

 

"A boy?" Gerard whispered and Rachel smiled, nodding her head slowly.

 

Mikey hissed out a 'yes' and everyone laughed. Donald had his mouth placed over his mouth in shock and Donna was grinning ear to ear.

 

"Not the girl your boyfriend wanted but at least everything looks fine... His heart rate is normal." she paused and went over the baby boys face. "He's got his thumb in his mouth. Isn't that adorable?" She pointed out and Gerard cooed in awe. "And his legs are stretched out. He's gonna' be a cutie... And apparently a bed hogger." She joked and Gerard laughed, wiping his tears away from his cheeks.

 

"Mom, oh my god..." Gerard continued to stare in awe. "I can't wait to see him."

 

"I'm gonna' be an uncle!" Mikey jumped up and down and Donald pet his shoulder lightly, nodding his head.

 

"I'm gonna' have a grandson." Donna smiled, leaning down to kiss Gerard's cheek.

 

*

They go back home and Gerard's got the pictures of the ultrasound in a folder; he's running up stairs and when he enters he sees Bert spread out on the bed, his head's buried under the pillow and there's a bottle of Smirnoff on the night stand.

 

Gerard holds the folder to his chest and lets out a deep sigh. He had butterflies... He hoped Bert wouldn't be upset. 

 

The past month has been hectic for the 18 year old boy. He had a lot on his plate. He had his band gigs, his job, school, and he was saving up for an apartment to bring the baby home to. It was all on him.

 

"Bert... I'm back." Gerard sat down on the bed and tapped Bert's shoulder. "Baby... I know the sex. D'you wanna' hear it. I have pictures too."

 

Immediately, Bert turned to his side and pulled the pillow off his head. "Babe, hey... Yeah, tell me. I wanna' know," he said, stretching his arms out over his head. "Is it a girl?"

 

"Um, it's a boy." He flipped open the folder and held up the photo.

 

Bert sat up quickly and looked Gerard in his eyes and then at the picture. "Oh my god. Really...?" He let it sink in after Gerard nodded. "Holy shit, babe. That's great!" he pulled Gerard into a hug and Gerard smiled.

 

Well, he wasn't expecting that sort of reaction.

 

"Not upset?"

 

"Fuck no, G. A boy... Wow. He's going to be such a punk." Bert laughed, breaking the hug to stare into Gerard's eyes. "And a fucking stud, I'll tell ya that much. Look at us. Making a fucking dude." 

 

"I'm so glad you're excited, babe. Mom's already out getting stuff... I told her not to get too much blue. Don't really wanna' cliche it, y'know? Like I told her a deep red or maybe green? Some black too... Anything but blue." Gerard rambled moving Bert's shaggy hair from his deep blue eyes.

 

"Yeah, totally... I agree. Red. I like red. Green too... Especially black."

 

Gerard sat there silent for a moment, just smiling and looking into Bert's heavy lidded eyes. "I wanna' name him something good... Something special."

 

"What'd you have in mind?"

 

"Robert."

 

Bert frowned and shook his head. "No," he couldn't keep a straight face. "No Bert jr. We don't want him to be anything like me... Let alone have my name," Bert laughed.

 

"Oh c'mon! Robert McCracken-Way. I like it!" Bert just glared at him. "Okay then... What do you want?"

 

"How about... Michael."

 

"... Mikey?" Gerard whispered.

 

"Yeah."

 

Gerard's eyes fell and his heart dropped. "I... I think it's perfect. Just, lets put his middle name Robert. Michael Robert McCracken-Way. Good?"

 

"Deal."

 

They kissed on it.

 

Gerard makes a sound of discomfort and shifts. "What's wrong." Bert broke the kiss and palmed Gerard's cheek tenderly. "Is everything okay?"

 

"Yeah, no... I'm good... I just. I really have to piss." He stood up quickly and hurried to the bathroom.

 

Bert watched as Gerard slammed the door shut. He had the biggest smile on his face.

 

*

The two boys decide to head out to Dan's to tell everyone the great news.

 

As soon as they walk in Bert's screaming from the top of his lungs. "A BOY MOTHERFUCKERS!!! I'm gonna' have a SON! IT'S A BOY!!!" Gerard covered his ears as he laughed at his boyfriends outburst.

 

"NO FUCKING WAY!" Quinn screamed from the couch. He jumped up and pulled Bert into a hug. "Congratulations, dude. You're gonna' have a little prick! Man, I'm so happy for you guys." He hugged Gerard next. He even started palming Gerard's belly and gently rubbing. 

 

"Hey there little guy." He got down on his knees and smiled.

 

Gerard's brows furrowed together in amazement as he watched his boyfriends best friend show so much interest. "Hey... It's uncle Quinn... I can't wait to meet you little buddy."

 

Gerard looked to Bert and smiled sheepishly.

 

"Man, that's way awesome..." Quinn's pressed lightly on Gerard's belly.

 

Something in that moment sparked and Gerard felt something... It felt sort of like gas... Like his stomach just shifted. "Oh." He gasped and pressed his hand onto the spot... Over Quinn's hand. "I... I felt him."

 

Quinn's eyes widened and it happened again. "Bert. holy shit. He kicked!" Quinn grinned.

 

Bert's mouth dropped and Quinn quickly moved out of the way. "No way, man..." Bert pressed his hand on the spot and waited.

 

"... It'll come." Gerard said anxiously. "He'll do it. Just wait."

 

A few minutes passed by and Bert has this look on his face. It looked like someone died.

 

"I'll feel it next time... Sheesh, Quinn. He's not even born yet and he already hates me. Are we sure you aren't the father?" Bert joked. He joked to mask the pain.

 

Dan and Jepha were near by, they both watched the scene.

 

"Don't say that." Gerard frowned. "Quinn was just there at the right time. You'll get your turn."

 

"Maybe... Maybe not." Bert walked off into the kitchen. "Round of shots boys!"

 

The guys follow Bert into the kitchen and Quinn looked back at Gerard. He had an apologetic look on his boyish face.

 

Gerard shook his head and went to take a seat on the couch. He touched his belly the whole time.


	17. Kicking

The party progressed to loud, obnoxious teenage boys running around the house like lunatics and Gerard remained on the couch. He had his hand on his belly, rubbing gently. Michael was awfully still and Gerard just figured he was comfortable in the position he moved into after Quinn had massaged him.

 

He had his mind wrapped around that event. He moved for Quinn and not for Bert. He didn't know the meaning of that... Maybe Michael felt safe...? Gerard felt safe when Quinn got down and talked to his belly. He felt cared for and he enjoyed the moment they shared. But it could have just been a coincidence.

 

He didn't have feelings for Quinn. Of course not... He just didn't expect that from Bert's best friend. He liked him a little more after that. How could he not?

 

"So, the name. Have you guys decided on it yet?" Jepha sat atop the bar and swigged down his beer, looking in Gerard's direction.

 

"Yeah, his name's gonna' be... Michael Robert McCracken." Bert hiccuped, throwing his arm over Dan's shoulder drunkenly. "My little bastard."

 

"Way." Gerard added from his spot on the couch. "McCracken-Way."

 

Dan laughed and Quinn glanced over at Gerard as he sat still on the couch.

 

"Yeah, yeah... Of course." Bert rolled his eyes. "Quinn, why don't you go and keep Gerard company. Talk to my kid some more. He likes you."

 

Gerard cringed and looked down at the floor. He examined the ridges on the carpet.

 

"Dude, relax. You'll get a chance to feel him. Your with G twenty four seven. It just happened. I didn't intend on it." Quinn said defensively. 

 

Gerard looked up and stared over at Bert as he leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. "Well, y'know... That's the thing. I'm bummed because of that fact."

 

"About being there twenty four seven and not getting the first feel?" Dan asked, he's going to the kitchen and when he came back he had two shots in his hands. He passed one to Bert who downed it as soon as he got it.

 

Bert made no face as he downed the rum and licked his lips whilst nodding his head. "He said I'd be the first." he nudged his head in Gerard's direction. 

 

Gerard let his head fall back and he stared at Bert. He just glared at his boyfriend. His eyes begged him to shut the fuck up and stop his bitching. It was an accident. A _fucking_ accident.

 

"Any who!" He clasped his hands. "When's my buddy Frank getting here. He's bringing weed."

 

Jepha pulled out his phone and checked. "He said he'd be here in ten minutes... So in like, five... I guess." He put his phone back in his pocket.

 

Oh great, Gerard thought, not Frank.

 

"Oh man, that's my fucking bro. I love that dude... My fucking brother." Bert swiped his hair away from his forehead. "I'm ready for another shot... Dan and Jepha. Join me."

 

Quinn watched his friends head into the kitchen. He wasn't invited so he made his way over to Gerard.

 

"I wanna' apologies." He whispered, hanging his head. "I didn't mean to be the first to feel him. Now Bert's all pissed at me."

 

"Quinn... Don't sweat it, man. It's not your fault. He'll get over it." Gerard touched Quinn's shoulder. "Lately he's been in a shit mood. He's got a lot on his plate. I mean... With me being pregnant, he's working a job, going to school and he's in a band with you guys. He's stressed... So every little thing is gonna' tick him off, y'know?"

 

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Quinn nodded and the knock at the door causes him to get up and answer it.

 

"Yo, amigo!" It's Frank he had a pack of beer under his arm. "My dad gave me this for the fuck of it." he laughed and stepped inside. "Gerard, hey lady-boy," he winked and Gerard waved weakly.

 

"Bert and them are in the kitchen. I'm out here talking to G..." Quinn said, shoving his hands into his pockets.

 

"Alright, awesome. I'll hang with you guys in a few." Frank walked into the kitchen.

 

Gerard followed him with his eyes and when he disappeared he moved his gaze over to Quinn who was biting his bottom lip and scratching the side of his head. His bleach blonde hair was messy and Gerard thought he looked adorable.

 

"Don't let it bother you Quinn... If it makes you feel better I'll talk to Bert right now." Gerard stood up carefully and Quinn ran over to him to help him. "Thanks..."

 

"Don't strain yourself."

 

"Don't worry about it Quinn, really." Gerard laughed, placing his hand on his lower back. "God this baby's growing fast."

 

"You look amazing." Quinn smiled. "I mean, being pregnant isn't a bad look on you. It's so natural..." 

 

Gerard smiled a genuine smile and pulled Quinn into a hug. "You're the nicest person I've ever met... You know that, right?" Gerard whispered.

 

"Hm... HM!" Bert coughed and Quinn broke the hug quickly. "What's this?"

 

"Bert..." Gerard shook his head at his boyfriend. His eyes were pleading. He didn't want him to make such a big deal out of this.

 

"What the fuck Quinn. Didn't you have enough? You get to feel my kid kick and now you're all over my boyfriend?" Bert approached the two teenage boys; his shoulders were bulked up and his stance made him appear taller then he actually is.

 

"It's not like that, man. I care about your relationship. Gerard's a friend. Like a brother, dude." Quinn stuck his hands out in defense.

 

"Bert." Gerard said again, this time a lot sterner than before. "Calm the fuck down. Really. We were just hugging. We're friends."

 

"Shut the hell up." Bert pointed and Gerard scoffed at him. "You shut your fucking mouth, G. I know you're needy and shit but that doesn't mean you need to be all over my friends."

 

"He's my friend too, Bert." Quinn stated. "And don't talk to your boyfriend like he's a piece of shit."

 

Gerard sat back down quickly. "I'm not getting in this." he said quickly and crossed his arms over his chest. "You're over reacting."

 

The rest of the guys come from the kitchen. "What's going on here?" Frank asked before he pressed a beer bottle to his lips and took a quick swig.

 

"My fucking boyfriend obviously prefers Quinn over me." Bert slurred pointing at his best friend. "You know what... Fuck you both. Fuck 'im, Quinn. Fuck 'im tonight for me--"

 

"BERT!" Gerard stood up abruptly. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Today we find out we're having a fucking son and you treat me like this? I can't believe this shit."

 

Quinn has this look of disgust on his face and Bert's eyes are red and it's all hazy and everyone's quiet.

 

"You're having a boy?" Frank asked from the back and Gerard nodded slowly. "That's so cool."

 

"Thanks." Gerard sniffed and took his seat back on the couch.

 

Bert glared at Quinn and then at Gerard before he made his way back to the kitchen. Dan and Jepha go with him.

 

"So..." Frank went to sit next to Gerard on the couch. "How's it feel being pregnant?"

 

"Weird." Gerard said simply. 

 

Commotion's coming from the kitchen and Bert's obnoxious raspy voice. He's yelling and most likely slamming his hand against the counters. "I'm so fucking PISSED!" They heard him scream and then Dan's telling him to calm down.

 

"He's always rowdy when he drinks." Quinn stated.

 

"Yeah..." Gerard wrapped his arms over his chest and looked down. "I sort of wanna' go home."

 

"I'll take you." Frank said quickly. "I mean, if that's okay with Bert... And yourself, of course."

 

"uh, yeah, that's cool with me. I don't need Bert's approval." Gerard stood up and grabbed his coat off the arm of the couch.

 

"He's my friend. I don't want any problems." Frank started to go to the kitchen.

 

"Yo, Bert. I'm taking your boy home. He wants to head out." Frank shouted, walking near the kitchen door.

 

"Take him... Please get him the fuck out of my sight!" Bert hollered and Gerard heard him.

 

"Asshole." Gerard said loud enough for Bert to hear him. "That's what you fucking are." He hurried out the house and he knows Bert's chasing after him to scream some more.

 

"And you're a fucking insensitive fuckhead!" He shouted after Gerard who just ignored him and got into the passenger seat of Frank's car when it was unlocked.

*

"You okay?" Frank turned his head to stare at Gerard. He had his hand palmed over his eyes.

 

"No. I'm not." he sniffed. He was pregnant and his hormones were going crazy. "I never do anything right... To Bert I'm just made of mistakes. I know he thinks this pregnancy is a mistake. I can tell."

 

"Hey, don't say that." Frank made a smooth turn until they exited Dan's neighborhood. "Bert's just drunk... If anyone's wrong it's him. He's not himself right now and he's going to realize that in the morning when he's sober. He'll admit he was the wrong one."

 

Gerard shook his head slowly and let out a deep, quivering, breath. "I don't want him to be like that when he drinks. Why can't he keep his judgement?"

 

"Not everyone can do that." Frank said and Gerard bit down on his bottom lip. "Listen, not everyone's strong enough for that. Bert, when he's drunk he lets it all hang out. He likes to be in a pit. I mean, he's kind of a shit starter... It's pretty obvious that he's bored."

 

"Yeah... You're right." Gerard wiped his hands down his face and stared at Frank for a brief moment. "Thanks."

 

"No problem."

 

The car ride is quiet now and Gerard's placing his hand on his belly on more than one occasion. Frank noticed.

 

"He kicking?" They're at a red light.

 

"Mhm... Really hard right now, actually." 

 

"Can I feel?" Frank wondered and Gerard nodded.

 

His hand is pressed on the noticeable bump and he palmed the spot where it stuck out more. "Oh wow... He's strong. How many months are you?"

 

"Four... I'm on my second trimester."

 

"And he's this strong already? Well damn. You've got yourself a little macho-man." Frank laughed; his hand was warming up the spot where Michael was pressed against and Gerard melted against it.

 

They don't notice the light turning green until they hear a shit ton of cars honking. Frank quickly teared his hand away with a giggle and hit the gas. "Got lost in the moment." He grinned at the younger boy.

 

Gerard grinned back.

 

They're in Gerard's neighborhood and Frank's getting out the car when he parked in the drive-way. "Don't move." He said, going to open Gerard's door.

 

"Thank you..." Gerard took the hand Frank had extended for him and let the shorter boy help him out. "I appreciate it, Frank." Gerard smiled as Frank held onto his hand a little longer than necessary.

 

"Don't thank me." Frank walked him to the front door.

 

Gerard blushed at that and nodded his head. "Um, thanks for driving me home then. I couldn't sit in that house with Bert talking to me the way he was. He doesn't usually... Y'know, say things like that. I don't know what's gotten into him."

 

"He gets jealous... It's in his nature." Frank leaned against the column. "what he said was pretty... Um, like it's not something I'd imagine him saying to someone he loves. Especially since you're pregnant with his child. It's weird. I wouldn't... I would never yell at someone I was having s baby with like that." he admitted and Gerard smiled at him.

 

"You're sweet... But I mean, like you said. It's in his nature." Gerard crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the column opposite from Frank. "I love him though."

 

"I know you do... I just think he needs to go easy on you. You are pregnant." Frank chuckled, tucking his bangs behind his ears.

 

"I'm glad you think that." Gerard said, and Frank smirked at him. "I kind of think you're less of a douche now."

 

"Ditto." Frank retorted and Gerard wrinkled his face at him.

 

"I was kind of rude to you... I know you don't want me to suck your cock." Gerard laughed.

 

"Well now... Don't get ahead of yourself. I find you super attractive. You're just my type too. I totally dig that nerdy, girly, long hair on a dude thing."

 

Gerard was shocked at Frank's honesty. "Really now?" He was taken aback.

 

"Oh yeah, for sure." Frank winked. He pealed himself off the column and jingled his keys. "Nice seeing you G. I'm glad we're not totally creepy around each other like our first impression." He cackled and made his way over to his car.

 

"See you Frank... I still think you're creepy." Gerard called out to him.

 

Frank let out a loud hyena like laugh as he got inside his car. He lowered his window to wave and Gerard waved back before opening the front door. He let himself in when Frank disappeared down the street.

 

Something felt odd... In his stomach. He didn't want to tell Frank, but the whole time they were talking Michael couldn't stop kicking.


	18. Signs

He's in bed when he hears a knock at his balcony door. His eyes peered open and he sat up slowly. He held onto his belly until he pulled open the french doors. "Bert... D'you know what time it is?" He glared over at his Star Wars clock. The bright, neon green lights read '4:46am'.

 

"Yeah... I wanna' apologise to you babe. I was... I was a total dickwad. I didn't mean anything I said to you. I apologized to Quinn too. We're cool. I don't want to ruin any of my friendships because of my jealousy. I know Quinn gives you that attention I lack to give you. I'm so sorry." He pulled the younger boy into a hug and then a quick kiss.

 

Gerard melted into it. Bert always knew what to say and that was one of Gerard's weaknesses. He forgave too easily. He never liked to hold grudges. "It's okay... I love you." Gerard wrapped his arms over Bert's shoulders. "I forgive you."

 

Bert took Gerard by his hand and guided him to the bed. "Down..." he whispered.

 

"Mhm..." Gerard murmured; grabbing Bert by his face and kissed him in small pecks, over and over again.

 

"Sex?" Bert asked huskily in between the kisses Gerard was giving him.

 

They moved onto the bed, Gerard bit down on Bert's bottom lip gently as he hummed out what was supposed to be a 'yes'.

 

Bert wasted no time getting Gerard's Star Wars pajama bottom down and onto the ground. He then worked on his own jeans and tossed it across the room. He wasn't wearing any underwear so he was in luck.

 

"Hold on a minute." Gerard placed his hand against Bert's shoulders. He used the other boy to keep balance as he rose his hips up and yanked down his briefs. "Mmm, there."

 

No time was wasted as Bert rummaged through the nightstand and pulled out a bottle of lube. He squirted a fair amount into the palm of his hand and then worked it up and down himself.

 

They were unusually silent at first, Gerard just tipped his head back and bit down on his bottom lip as he waited for his boyfriend to push inside of him.

 

Lately, their sex has been weird. Bert was always drunk and Gerard was always tired. He didn't know which one of them was worst in the situation. 

 

A week earlier Bert had pushed into him with little to no lubricant and he groaned out in pain and asked Bert to slow down. He didn't, he acted like he didn't hear Gerard groaning in and pain and pushing against his chest to get him off. Gerard didn't bring it up. He didn't even know if he could even classify that as rape, but it still bothered him to this day... 

 

He was surprised Bert decided to use a generous amount of lubricant this night. Bert positioned himself over Gerard's body and brought the younger boys legs around his waist. He had his cock in his hands as he hunched over and pushed his face into Gerard's hair. "Ooh shit..." he gasped as he slammed smoothly into Gerard's body in one quick stroke.

 

Gerard placed his hand into Bert's hair and moaned quietly into the silence of the room. "Go faster..." he whispered once he noticed Bert kept the rhythm slow.

 

"Seriously?" Bert half moaned and laughed. "Okay..." he said once Gerard nodded against him.

 

He did as he was told and Gerard's mouth fell open once Bert struck his prostate dead on. "Oh god, fuck." he cringed a good kind of cringe and tightened his grip on the back of Bert's hair. He took a few strands of his hair in between his fingers and pulled.

 

Bert placed one of his hands against Gerard's pudgy hip and his other against Gerard's calf which was touching his lower back.

 

The bed started to squeak obnoxiously and Gerard gnawed down on his bottom lip to keep quiet. The bed was making enough noise for them.

 

Bert obviously couldn't contain himself since he was drunk. "Shit... I'm gonna' cum. I'm gonna' fucking cum." He groaned out obnoxiously.

 

Gerard let his hands fall from the back of Bert's head and down on his shoulders. He wrapped his arms around Bert and pressed his lips against his to keep him quiet.

 

"Shhh... Baby, shh... M'parents and Mikey are asleep." Gerard whispered into Bert's ear once the kiss broke.

 

Bert came to a halt and groaned out in annoyance. "Thanks for giving me a boner kill... Here, instead of me fucking you how 'bout you suck my dick." Bert pulled out of Gerard roughly and sat back on the headboard.

 

Gerard looked up at him and frowned. "No... Look, c'mere." he sat up and climbed into Bert's lap. "Let me..." he gripped Bert's erection and pumped at it for a few seconds until Bert let his head hit the headboard.

 

Gerard's eyes are glued to Bert's face. The older boy had his mouth open and his eyes closed. He was letting out this gaspy sigh and Gerard loved it.

 

"Better?" Gerard kissed his jaw as he sunk down onto Bert's lap slowly. "Oh god that feels fucking good. I feel all of you." he worked his elbows down on Bert's shoulders and pressed his nose against Bert's.

 

"This is way better." Bert said, opening his eyes... And when he does he sees Gerard's hazel colored orbs staring into his hazy blue ones and it's nice. He feels like he's never seen eyes until now. He can't look away.

 

"What're you thinking right now?" Gerard whispered; his lips lightly touched Bert's as their noses nuzzled against each others.

 

"M'thinkin' of how beautiful you are and how lucky I am..." He purred as Gerard rode him.

 

"Are you really?" Gerard moaned out and Bert nodded. "I'm thinkin' about how nice you feel inside of me." he laughed against Bert's fuzzy cheek.

 

Bert laughed and worked his hands on Gerard's hips. "That too." he agreed. "Also... I'm admiring your tummy against mine. I love it. I love our son and I love you."

 

Gerard stopped riding Bert in that moment and licked at his dry lips. "I love you too... So much." he pet down the side of Bert's face and stared into his eyes. "Why do you... Why do you..." he stopped midsetence to pout.

 

"Why do I--what?" Bert caressed Gerard's cheek. Their faces were literally an inch apart.

 

"Why do you love me? I'm sort of pathetic."

 

Bert's brows furrowed together in confusion and adverted his eyes to the side. "Well, I'm pathetic too... Maybe that's why?"

 

Gerard smiled a lopsided smile and leaned in and pressed a small kiss against Bert's chin.

 

"We're pathetic together." he said and Bert nodded stiffly. "We don't normally talk during sex... This is different. I like it."

 

"we're doing a lot more talking then actual sex." Bert giggled and tipped his head to the side.

 

"Yeah..." Gerard paused and rested his head on Bert's shoulder. "Y'know... You're right on my spot."

 

"Am I now?" he thrusted his hips up and Gerard moaned. "Lay back..." Bert whispered into Gerard's ear and with help Gerard was on his back and Bert was slamming into him.

 

They both finally reached climax and Bert pulled out gently. "Y'Good?" Bert asked as Gerard breathed in and out harshly. His legs were up and his feet were planted heavily onto the bed. "Babe... Are you okay?" he patted Gerard's thigh once he didn't reply.

 

"I'm... Fine... Just out of... Breath." He dropped his legs flat on the bed and moved on his side.

 

"Need anything? Like water or something?" Bert took a seat next to Gerard and rubbed at his back.

 

"N-no... I just, oh God," he said as he stood up quickly and ran to the bathroom.

 

He got down on his knees in front of the toilet and started to vomit.

 

"Awe man, babe..." Bert dragged himself over to Gerard and continued to rub his back and hold his hair back. "Shit... I hate see you like this."

 

Gerard just shook his head and pulled his head out of the toilet when he was finished. "M'need... I wun' guh t'bed," he murmured incoherently but Bert understood him perfectly.

 

"Okay... C'mon," he brought his hands under Gerard's arms and hoisted his naked body off the ground and over to the bed. They stumbled on the way but Bert saved him from falling. "There..." He pulled the blankets back and brought them up to Gerard's chin. "Get some rest beautiful." he kissed the tip of Gerard's nose and got into bed with him after he turned off the light.

 

*

 

The next day is Saturday and The Used has a gig at a night club called 'Bat Cave'. Gerard decided that he wanted to see his boyfriend in action... Maybe it'll make him feel better about the fact that Bert's dropping college for this.

 

They take Gerard's parent's car and the ride there Bert's quiet, being cautious on the road since Gerard was in the passenger seat.

 

"I can't wait to see you perform. It's gonna' be awesome." Gerard grinned and Bert just nodded his head slowly.

 

They arrived in ten minutes and it's not too busy since it's nine at night. 

 

"Wanna' wait at the bar while the boys and I set up?" Bert held his hand on the way in and Gerard agreed.

 

"Yeah, um, sure..." He was at the bar when Bert disappeared.

 

He's standing there alone for a moment until someone he recognizes shows up.

 

"Hey geegee." It was Sam and Gerard smiled at her. "What're you doing here?" she got up close to him and threw her arm over his shoulder.

 

"Bert's band is playing tonight. What about you? You and the girls are on today?" he asked her.

 

"Yeah, Jam and I are waiting on Pam to get her with her drum set. Late like always..." 

 

"That's unfortunate. Bert didn't tell me you guys were playing here."

 

"Last minute thing."

 

"Oh..."

 

"Any who!" She removed her arm from Gerard's shoulder and leaned against the bar. "How's the baby? Everyone's saying it's a boy."

 

"New spreading that fast?" Gerard placed his hand on his belly. "But yeah, he's a boy."

 

"That's so cool. He's gonna' be a cutie." she smiled and Gerard nibbled on his bottom lip. "What's wrong? You look unsure."

 

"I'm just scared."

 

"About what?"

 

"I don't know... About the process. I'm like, puking everything I eat. I can't sleep... I can't focus. I can't stop thinking about the day I give birth." Gerard hung his head and Sam frowned.

 

"Don't think about it too much, man. It's gonna' be okay. You're strong." She rubbed his shoulder and pushed her self off the counter. "I gotta go set up. I see Pam." She started to walk off and Gerard watched her leave.

 

He was alone again.

 

By ten-thirty the club was getting packed and Gerard no longer alone at the bar. He was sitting on the stool and talking with the bartender about tattoos and art and whatnot. The guy was super attractive and taking a liking in Gerard.

 

"You're really cute, y'know. Has anyone ever told you you kind of look like a prettier version of Billy Corgan?" The guy was mixing a drink for a chick nearby, but conversing with Gerard and he couldn't help but blush.

 

"Sometimes..." He giggled and the guy winked at him. "I really like the Smashing Pumpkins."

 

"Me too... Do you have a boyfriend?"

 

Gerard was taken aback by how bold the bartender was. "Uh, yeah, I do... He's performing tonight. He's in a band called The Used."

 

"The Used? Oh man, great band! I read about them in the newspaper Thursday! They're getting big here," he said and Gerard looked at him with a confused look on his face. "Yeah, they did an interview on the radio and A&R's are hounding their asses."

 

"Really?" Gerard leaned over the bar. He still had that confused look written all over his face. "The Used?"

 

"Yeah! The Used." He laughed and Gerard leaned back again. "Which of the guys are you dating? Is it Bert the singer?"

 

"Yeah. Bert. We've been together for two years."

 

"Man, hold onto him. Chicks are going crazy. Don't want to lose him. He's gonna' be the next big thing I reckon."

 

The conversation ends there and Gerard hopped off the bar and started to make his way near the stage. He wondered if Bert knew of the success they were gaining.

 

"Hey!" Gerard shouted when he spotted Jepha near the set. "Jeph! C'mere!"

 

Jepha turned and spotted him and started to head on down. "What's up G? Everything okay?" His hand found Gerard's hip but Gerard shrugged him off.

 

"I'm fine... This guy at the bar was telling me that you guys have an article in the newspaper. Did you know?" he leaned into his boyfriends friends ear.

 

"Uh, yeah! We know!" He smiled and stuck his hands in his pockets. "We're so psyched. People from a few record companies are gonna' be here tonight. We're planning on signing with Burn Out. My dad knows people."

 

"Why didn't Bert tell me? Is that why he's so quiet today?" Gerard asked and Jepha nodded his head.

 

"Yeah, most likely. He's backstage right now in the bathroom. I think he's drinking with Dan. I just took a shot like, a minute ago." He rubbed his hands together.

 

"He's fucking drinking?" Gerard frowned and shook his head. "You know what... Can I go back there real quick with you?"

 

"Yeah, c'mon." Jepha took his hand and showed him backstage where a bunch of equipment was being set up by the crew.

 

"Who's your girlfriend, Jeph?" It was a random guy who asked and Gerard snarled at him.

 

"This is Gerard. Bert's boyfriend. Watch yourself Nic." Jepha gave him the look and the guy laughed. "BERT!" he hollered and they can hear Bert laughing like a maniac.

 

"No WAY!" they heard him shout and Gerard's getting Jepha to let go of his hand. "Tell that motherfucker FUCK-TO-THE-YES!"

 

"We're on the phone with Graves!" Quinn came out of the bathroom and jumped up and down.

 

Jepha's mouth dropped and he started to run in the bathroom.

 

"He wants to The Misfits and The Used to tour together on Christmas!" Quinn continued to holler.

 

Dan and Bert exited the bathroom. Dan's holding the cellphone to his ear and Bert's next to him, looking wasted out of his mind.

 

"Bert. you fucking kept me waiting so you can fucking drink? You douche!" Gerard grabbed his boyfriends arm and shook him. "Why didn't you just say so?"

 

Bert ignored him and watched as Dan spoke with Michael Graves.

 

"Yes sir. It would be the biggest honor. We're looking forward to it... Yes sir. Yes, for sure. Alright... Yeah, see you soon." He hung up the phone and air-punched. "Motherfucking Christmas show sons of bitches!"

 

All the guys cheered and Gerard just stood there; his arms crossed over his chest.

 

"C'mon babe! Be happy! I told you it would work out!" Bert kissed Gerard on the cheek and Gerard shrugged him off.

 

"I'm mad at you." He said simply and started to head off the stage.

 

"What I do now?" He heard Bert ask the guys as he walked off.


	19. Better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Supah-dupah short.

Gerard's seated at the bar again and the hot bartender is talking to him about Star Wars and bands he likes. Gerard and the guy share mutual interests but it's best to keep it at that.

 

The show was starting soon and Gerard decided to leave the bar and head back stage to watch the show.

 

Bert and the guys were in a small circle, their arms were wrapped around each other. Gerard can hear Bert talking saying a few words encouragement... Then they exchanged I love you's and they broke apart. 

 

Gerard leaned against the wall nearby as Bert started to make his way over to him. "Hey..." he greeted, pulling the pregnant boy into a small hug. "I love you, okay? And I know you're mad at me for drinking but... I'm still doing what I gotta do. Go easy on me."

 

Gerard scoffed and shook his head. "It's not about liquor, you idiot. It's about lying and keeping things from me." he explained and Bert broke the hug. "Why didn't you tell me about the record label."

 

"I wanted it to be a surprise..." Bert slurred.

 

"You had me stressed because you wanted to surprise me? Bert, you know I'm pregnant. I'm not supposed to be stressing." Gerard said to him and Bert shrugged. "I know you weren't trying to do that... But you know how I am."

 

"Thought it'd be nice is all."

 

Someone called out Bert's name and he told them he'd be there. "I gotta go babe. I'm on. I hope you like the show."

 

Gerard nodded and Bert walked off. He stayed put because he had a good view of the stage from where he was.

 

The curtains rose up and the guys were all ready. They had their instruments and Bert had the mic in his hand.

 

The crowd out in front of them was surprisingly big and Bert greeted them, "We're The fucking Used! Those of you who've seen us before and managed to memorize a few songs sing a long. This song is called Maybe Memories."

 

When Bert started to sing Gerard's face lit up... He was still upset though... But his voice. It was fucking magical.

 

Out of no where Gerard feels arms wrapped around his midsection and he tensed up. "Hey!" Frank yelled into his ear and Gerard turned around.

 

"Hey you!" He shouted, pulling him into a hug. "I didn't know you were coming!" the hug lasted longer than necessary.

 

"Bert called me like, twenty minutes ago. He wanted me to." He said into Gerard's ear. "You smell good..." He took a deep breath and said loudly. Gerard pulled away quickly and gave him a weird look.

 

"What?" He had heard him but he was confused.

 

"Nothing!" Frank laughed and turned to watch the guys on stage. "They're fucking amazing!"

 

"Yeah, they are."

 

The song is coming to an end and Bert started talking to the crowd. 

 

"I'm a little mad at him." Gerard told Frank.

 

"Still?"

 

"Something else. He lied to me and hid things from me."

 

"Really? Like what?" Frank leaned against the wall Gerard near and stared intently at his vacant expression.

 

"He didn't tell about being signed soon... And he just let me stress over our future security, y'know? Like... I feel better now but I'm upset because he didn't reassure me. I was starting to get depressed and he just let me." Gerard confessed, crossing his arms over his chest.

 

"Well, that's harsh." Frank stated simply and Gerard nodded. "Any reason he did that?"

 

"To 'surprise' me." Gerard rolled his eyes.

 

"That's a shit reason."

 

"Yeah. I know..."

 

"Is he drunk now?" Frank watched Bert hop around stage as he started up the next song when the guys started playing.

 

"Yeah. Shocker." He said sarcastically and Frank chuckled.

 

They go silent for a moment and the song is done.

 

"Wanna' head to the bathrooms and talk?" Frank shook his bangs from his eyes and Gerard glared at him for a quick second before nodding his head quickly.

 

*

 

"Vent, dude... Vent." Frank sat atop the bathroom sink counter and Gerard stood in front of him, with his arms crossed over his chest.

 

"No, I mean... I'm upset. Yeah, but like... Bert's not being as involved as I want him to be y'know? I'm the one that's pregnant. I'm the one going through this physically. It's tough, man. I can't do it alone-I just can't." Gerard nibbled on his bottom lip when he finished 'venting'.

 

"You don't have to. You know you can contact me if you ever need anything, right? I'm pissed at Bert right now. He's like a little brother to me but I'll knock some sense into him if you need me to." Frank half laughed as he munched on his nails. "I'm on your side."

 

"It's not about that. I just want him... I want him to already have those senses. He just have them already, Frank. Not have them beaten into him. That's what frustrates me about him." Gerard shook his head. 

 

The music behind the door softens and Bert's letting out a mind rattling screech. Frank laughed at the sudden out burst.

 

"I feel you, babe... I'm still gonna' kick his ass."

 

Gerard glared at his new friend and rolled his eyes.

 

"No, really. I like you and I like Bert but this is ridiculous. He needs to treat you better. Not even because you're pregnant. He always needs to treat you special... Because you are. You're perfect and he's lucky to have you in his life. I wouldn't let you go if you were mine." Frank had his hand against his own chest; he's got an intense look in his eyes.

 

Gerard didn't know how to properly respond to that, so he just says, "Thanks."

 

He said thank you like someone would if a person said 'bless you' after a sneeze. He felt like an utter fool.

 

Frank smiled though. He smiled with one side of his mouth and then nibbled on on his lips.

 

Gerard kind of felt dirty in that moment. Like they shared a deep, dark secret. Frank made him feel different... Better, actually. He could get use to this.


End file.
